ALDUB 3rd EB Awards: Search for the Next Yaya

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The ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode aired the search for the next yaya before the De Explorer entourage goes to the Broadway Centrum for the said event. Divina and the grannies were shown dancing to Rihanna’s “Work” before switching to Dawin’s “Dessert”. Donya Tinidora later felt a little shaken with the upbeat tunes. “Umaalog ang katawan ko.” (My body felt like trembling.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Bossing Vic was joined in the KalyeSerye commentary panel by Ms. Ruby Rodriguez and Mr. Ryan Agoncillo. “Hindi pa ba kayo pupunta rito, mga lola?” (Are you not coming over here, grannies?) Donya Tinidora confirmed their attendance for the event later at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Naku, bossing. Mamaya. Antayin nyo lang kami. Alam nyo naman kaming importanteng nakalimutan nyo na ba yung mga yaya?” (Later. Just wait for us. You know that it’s important that we pick the next nanny.)

Lola Nidora echoed Donya Tinidora’s alibi. “May gagawin lang muna kami, Marvic.” (We’d just do something here, Marvic.) Divina was a little concerned though at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Teka lang po, lola. Tingin nyo po ba kakayanin nila talaga yung challenges na ipapagawa ninyo?” (Wait, granny. You think they can endure the challenges that you’re about to make them do?)

Donya Tinidora recalled how Lola Nidora had done this before. “Alam mo naman yang si ate. Nakita mo yung ginawa sa yo ni Alden?” (You know elder sister. You saw the things that Alden did for you?) Divina remembered it at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode too. “Opo.” (Yes.) Donya Tinidora remembered the hardship that Alden went through way back before Donya Tinidora and Donya Tidora returned to the Philippines. “Si Alden ha? Ganun na kahirap. Eto pa kayang mga yaya. Naku. Sigurado yan. Good luck sa kanila.” (For Alden. It’s really hard. What more for these nanny applicants. For sure.)

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Lola Nidora found Donya Tinidora and Divina harsh. “Wow! Grabe naman kayo sa akin. Kailangan lang natin gawin ito para malaman kung sino ang karapat-dapat na makakasama natin sa mansion.” (You’re too much when it came to me. We just need to do this to know who is worthy to be with us in the mansion.) Donya Tinidora’s sarcasm was also felt at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Naku! Pano natin makakasama kung mamamatay agad dito sa challenge mo?” (How can [the winner] be with us if she would die quickly with your challenges?)

Lola Nidora didn’t think that they’re cause to worry at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Wag kayong mag-alala. Kayang kaya nila yan. Alam ko, hindi makakasama yan. Kasi kung may mangyayaring masama, papano pa natin mapapakinabangan?” (Don’t worry. They can handle it. I know it won’t be bad for them. Because if something bad happens, how can they be of use to us?)

That was Donya Tinidora’s concern at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards. “Yun na nga.” (That’s the point. Lola Nidora was confident that the applicants can make it. “Kayang kaya nila yan.” (They can do it.) Donya Tinidora pushed for the challenges to kick off. “Umpisahan na natin ito? Patatagalin pa ba?” (Let’s get this started. Does it really have to take that long?)

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Divina begged some additional time. “Sandali lang po. Parang may kulang pa.” (Please wait. It’s as if there’s still something lacking.) Donya Tinidora saw the applicants present at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Andyan na sila. Kumpleto na yung apat.” (They’re already there. All four of them.) Divina’s neck got stretched again while checking the monitor. “Iba po. Kulang pa po, lola. Lalabas din po yun.” (It’s different. He will soon come out.) Soon, Donya Tinidora got the drift. “Ah si Alden.”

Alden was then shown at the Broadway Centrum’s nearby gym. Divina realized Alden was having a workout.“Hala!” (Oh no!) Donya Tinidora saw Alden’s attempts at practicing how to use a surfboard. “Walang dagat diyan. Ang meron diyan, ilog.” (There is no sea there. More like a river.) Divina asked Alden at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ano, Alden? Kasali ka din?” (You’re in the contest too?)

Lola Nidora asked Divina instead. “Bakit nakaganyan yan si Alden?” (Why is Alden doing that?) Divina was clueless. “Di ko po alam diyan. Baka po susunod. Huy, Alden!” (I don’t know to him. Maybe he’d like to follow. Alden!) It took awhile for Alden to notice Divina and the grannies at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Andyan na po pala kayo.” (You’re already there.)

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Lola Nidora asked Alden directly. “Bakit nagwa-warm up ka din?” (Why are you warming up too?) Alden then asked Lola Nidora back. “Lola, baka puede rin po ba akong mag-apply?” (Granny, maybe I can apply too?) Lola Nidora knew of the nanny job opening. Not a bodyguard job opening at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Mag-apply?”

Alden elaborated his query. “Mag-apply po na tagapangalaga ng puso ni Maine.” (I’d like to apply as the caretaker of Maine’s heart.) Alden may have addressed Divina as Maine. But she did not forget her adlib at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Inaano ka ba?” (What have I done to you?) It led to a DUBsmash exchange that doesn’t come that often in the KalyeSerye anymore.

Divina tried to butt in a knock knock joke. “Huy! Mamaya ha? Punta kami diyan. Knock knock.” (Later, okay? We’d be coming over. Knock knock.) Alden asked in reply. “Who’s there?” Divina answered. “I missed.” Alden replied. “I missed who.” Divina’s knock knock joke at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards turned out to be cute. “I missed you.” Donya Tinidora thought it was Divina slipping her greeting through a joke. “Hindi naman knock knock yun. Message yun eh.” (That’s not a knock knock joke. That’s a message.)

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Divina explained. “Pasimple lang po, lola.” (I just tried to butt it in.) Alden then came up with a joke that he prepared prior to the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Maine, anong tawag sa taong walang baga?” (What do you call a man without lungs?) Divina asked back instead of guessing. “Ano?” (What?) Alden replied. “E di LALUNGS.” Divina can’t force a laugh out of her. “Alam mo, Alden. Buti na lang naka-sleeveless ka. Kahit corny joke mo.” (Good thing you’re wearing a sleeveless jersey. Even if your joke failed.)

Alden then told Divina. “May nalaman ako sa yo.” (I learned something about you.) It almost turned Divina pale albeit half-laughing. “Ano yun?” (What is it?) Alden played mind games further with Divina. “Secret.”It got Divina even more nervous at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Hoy! Ano yun?” (What is it?) Alden laugned. “Ano pala ha?” (So you were?)

Divina was at the verge of tearing up. “Hoy! Lola, si Alden. Inaano ka ba? Ano ba?” (Granny, look at Alden. What have I done to you? What the heck!) Alden let the topic slide at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. He addressed her again as Divina. “Divina saka sa mga lola po. Kita kita po tayo dito sa Broadway para sa EB Dabarkads Awards po.” (Divina, and to the grannies. See you later here at Broadway for the EB Dabarkads Awards.)

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Donya Tinidora tried to avenge in behalf of Divina. “May alam ako diyan. Naipit sa elevator yan. Nakulong sa elevator.” (I know something about him too. He got stuck in the elevator.) Alden just laughed it off. Divina asked Donya Tinidora further. “Kelan po, lola?” (When was it, granny?) Donya Tinidora didn’t reveal it on cam at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode.

Lola Nidora found Alden playful at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Alden, kung anu-anong nalalaman mo.” (Alden, you’ve been learning various stuff.) Alden had to apologize for scaring Divina. “Sori po, lola.” (I’m sorry, granny.) Lola Nidora gave Alden something else to do at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Mabuti pa, tulungan mo na lang kami sa pagja-judge.” (It would be better if you would just help us with the judging part.)

Alden agreed. “Sige po. Okay po.” Donya Tinidora took this as a signal to roll call the applicants once again at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Simulan na to. Nasan na ba sila? Mga yaya, go!” (Let’s get started. Where are the nannies?) [In the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards, the words “yaya” and “kasambahay” are interchangeably used to mean domestic helper. The succeeding challenges will reveal it.) After Donya Tinidora called each contender, she gave them the opportunity to introduce themselves once more.

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Yaya In was at her talkative self at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode.“Yaya In! Yaya In! Ang itawag sa akin. Ako po si Kit Marikit. Kahit saan, sumasabit. Maputi’t maliit. Mahilig sa pakbit. Tunay na kaakit-akit at mabait. Mapagkakatiwalaan dahil hindi nangungipit. At may kasabihan ako si Yaya In. Daig ng madaldal ang masipag. Dahil ang masyadong masipag, laging pagod. At tandaan! Ako si Yaya In. Kayong mga lola, aalalahanin. Woo! Yaya In!”

(Nanny In! Nanny In! That’s what they call me. I am Kit Marikit. I stick wherever may be. White and small and I like pakbit [cooked vegetables Ilocano style]. Truly lovely and nice. Trust-worthy because I don’t omit. And there’s a proverb that I am Yaya In. And I say the talkative trumps the industrious. Because people who are too industrious are always tired. I am Yaya In. You, grannies, would always be my concern.)

Donya Tinidora heaved a sigh of relief once Yaya In is done talking. “Hay salamat. Tumigil din siya.” (Thank goodness. She’s done.) Lola Nidora found Yaya In’s opening speech at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode as pleasant. “Maganda.” (That was nice.) Donya Tinidora then gave the floor to Yaya Glo. “Ikaw. Pakilala ka naman.” (It’s your turn to introduce yourself.

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Yaya Glo went with the polite route at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Hi! Hi everyone. Good afternoon. I’m Yaya Glo. Short for Yaya Glota. And I am confidently beautiful in my own. And I’m extravagant. In cleaning. And in washing. In taking good care. Because it circulates the blood. So always remember. I’m a simple girl with a simple dream.”

Yaya Pak spoke once given the signal at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ako naman po si Yaya Pak. Pak sa ganda! Pak sa lahat! Kaya sa mga nasa studio, kung ayaw masapak, palakpak! At ako po ay naniniwala sa kasabihan na kung pangit man ako sa inyong paningin, tingnan nyo ang susunod sa akin.” (I am Yaya Pak. I pack beauty. I pack a lot of things. So people in the studio, if you don’t want to get smacked, please clap! And I believe in the proverb that if I am ugly before your eyes, look at the person next to me.)

Divina somewhat laughed. “Grabe siya.” (That was harsh.) Donya Tinidora found it funny too. And so she let the next contender introduce herself at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Eto na nga yung susunod sa kanya. Yaya Git.” (Here’s the person next to her. Yaya Git.)

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Yaya Git tried to rebut Yaya Pak’s shade at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Hi everyone. My name is Yaya Git. Ang may misteryosong armpit. At ako rin ay may kasabihan. Kung pangit man ako sa inyong paningin, bakulaw yung nauna sa akin.” (I am the one with the mysterious armpit. I have a proverb too. If I am ugly before your eyes, the person that spoke before I did was a beastly creature.)

Donya Tinidora liked the steaming animosity among some contenders. “Naku, mainit yung laban na to ha?” (Oh my, this would be a heated competition, huh?) Lola Nidora foresaw an interesting competition at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Puede. Walang personalan at pisikalan ha?” (Possible. Nothing personal and physical, okay?)

Lola Nidora then gave some more words of wisdom at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Sana ay buo ang loob nyo sa anumang mangyayari ngayon. Eto lang ang paraang naisip ko para suriin kung sino sa inyo ang pipiliin namin bilang bago naming yaya. Alam nyo, ang pagiging isang kasambahay ay mahirap. Ngunit dakila. Hindi lang bahay ang inyong aalagaan. Kundi ang mga taong piniling pagsilbihan. Ngayon pa lang, saludo na kami sa inyong mga kasambahay ay tunay na maaasahan at mapagkakatiwalaan. Handa na ba kayo?”

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(I hope your will is strong in whatever happens today. This is the only way that I thought to scrutinize which among you will be chosen as our new nanny. You know, being a domestic helper is hard. But it’s a noble job. You are taking care of not only homes. But also the people that you have chosen to serve. As early as now, we salute the domestic helpers that are truly reliable and trust-worthy. Are you ready?)

All contestants at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode replied. “Handa na!” (We are ready.) Yaya In ended up talking more than she should. “Handang handa na po kami, mga lola! Kami po ay laging handa!” (We are so ready, grannies. We are always ready!) Donya Tinidora cut off Yaya In before she gets carried away again. “Hoy!” Divina had to distance the microphone from Yaya In. “Okay na. Okay na. Okay na.”

Donya Tinidora had to admit that she wasn’t impressed with the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode contenders’ opening statements. “Puro kayo salita. Tingnan natin ngayon kung sino talaga ang magaling sa inyo ha? Eto ipaliliwanag natin kung ano mga una ninyong gagawin. Ganito lang yan.” (You’re all words. Let’s see now who among you is really great. We will explain what would you do first. It’s just this.)

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Donya Tinidora gave the floor to Lola Nidora “Ang first challenge. Physical challenge. Una naming susukatin ang inyong liksi at lakas. Dito malalaman kung kakayanin ninyo ang mga gawain sa mansion.” (The first challenge is physical challenge. We will measure your alertness and strength. This is where we’ll know if you can endure domestic work at the mansion.) The details were then provided by Donya Tinidora at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode.

Donya Tinidora stood beside one of the monoblock chairs for the first task in the first challenge. “Meron po kami ditong mga bunot. Tiga-tigalawa po kayo. Isusuot ang bunot sa inyong mga paa. Wag sa kamay, okay? Tapos niyan, tatakbo kayo.” (We have here a couple of coconut husk brushes. Wear the husks on your feet. Not on the hands, okay? After that, run.)

Donya Tinidora moved to the next task at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Pangalawa dito sa pangalawang istasyon. Merong mga labada rito. Dahil ang mga yaya, siempre naglalaba. Bukod sa pagbubunot. De color at puti. Paghihiwalayin. Pero ang gagawin, hindi ninyo ilalagay. Gagamitin ang kamay. Isu-shoot ang puti at de color dun sa mga palanggana. (Second task at the second station. We have the laundry here. Because nannies do the laundry. Apart from scrubbing the floor with husks. We have the coloreds and the whites. Separate them. But use your hands. Shoot the whites and the colored on the designated basins.)

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The next stop at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode involved water. “At ang pangatlo naman. Meron kaming mga tubig dito. Ang mga yaya, pag nawalan ng kuryente, umiigib sa poso. Kukuha kayo ng tubig dito. Ililipat nyo dito sa baldeng nandito.” (And the third stop. We have a pail of water here. Nannies, whenever there isn’t any electricity, you need to fetch water from the deep well pump. Get water here. Transfer per bucket to the pails here.)

Donya Tinidora explained the closing task after the water job at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Kapag puno na, mauubos na ang tubig niyan. Puede na kayong tumakbo papunta naman kayo dito sa inyong mga damit. Dahil tapos na kayong magtrabaho, magbibihis na kayo ng inyong mga damit dahil eto ang inyong mga pantulog. Okay?” (Once it’s full, chances are you get to consume all the water [on the big pail]. You may run here for your clothes. Because you’re done with work, you’d change into your sleepwear.)

Lola Nidora referred to the clothes found at the end of the physical challenge as the official chambermaid uniform. “Yan ang kanilang uniform.” (That will be their uniform.) Donya Tinidora referred to the same clothes shown at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode as sleepwear. “Uniform nila para pantulog. Pag tapos na, pupunta kayo dun sa mga platform kung saan andun ang inyong mga pangalan. Okay?” (It’s their sleepwear. Once done changing clothes, go to the platform where your name is written. Okay?)

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Bossing Vic suddenly thought of Yaya Git. “May paramedics ba tayo diyan?” (Do we have paramedics?) Donya Tinidora replied. “Meron po. Kumpleto. Bago po tayo mag-umpisa, lahat po tayo, taas muna mga kamay.” (We have. It’s complete. Before we begin, all of you hands up.) Divina repeated Donya Tinidora’s command to make sure everyone at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode heard. “Taas ang kamay.” (Hands up.)

Yaya In commented about her underarms. “Maputi kilikili ko. Pero may amoy.” (My underpits are white. But they smell.) Lola Nidora almost rushed the challenge at the ALDUb 3rd EB Awards episode. “Bibilisan natin ito.” (Let’s get this done quickly.) Donya Tinidora had to check Yaya Glo’s underarms too. “Bakit hindi mataas? Uy! Naglalawa na agad. Taas! Taas!” (Why isn’t raised high? Hey! They’re immediately wet! Up! Up!) Yaya Glo could only laugh it off.

Ruby saw the way Yaya Git raised her hands. “Yung nasa dulo, lola.” (The one at the end, granny.) Donya Tinidora declared an ultimatum at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ang problema, ang hindi magtaas ng kamay, disqualified na po.” (Whichever raised hands that are not high enough will get disqualified.)

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Yaya Git took it a little personally. “May problema ba?” (Do we have a problem?) Divina tried begging Yaya Git to raise her hands higher at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Yaya Git, isa lang.” (Please. Just once.) Bossing Vic overruled Donya Tinidora’s ultimatum.“Me pilay. Me pilay.” (She has sore armpits.) With Bossing Vic’s decision, the challenge was set.

And so the challenge started with Yaya Pak taking the early lead. She doesn’t have a problem walking with coconut husks as step-ins. Yaya Glo and Yaya In closely overtook Yaya Pak at the laundry task. Yaya Pak had difficulty shooting the clothes to the basin. Yaya Glo got the advantage against Yaya In and the rest at the water task. She got the advantage again upon wearing the chambermaid uniform quickly. She got to her podium first.

Yaya Pak almost got the uniform wrong if not for Divina’s tip at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. Yaya In was next to step in. Yaya Git got to her podium last. She almost walked. Tired and exhausted. Upon wearing the uniform, she found the courage to stretch her arms up. “Taas kamay! Argh!” (Hands up!) It covered her armpits well enough.

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Divina saw who made it first to her podium. “Nauna si Yaya Glo.” (Yaya Glo was first.) Bossing Vic saw who made it last to her podium at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Walang apron si Yaya Git.” (Yaya Git is not wearing an apron.) Yaya Git played dumb. “Teka, paunahan ba to?” (Is this about who makes it first?) Divina somewhat muttered. “Ay! Hindi na-orient.” (She wasn’t oriented.)

Unlike Divina, Donya Tinidora didn’t see clearly who made it first to their podium. “Sandali. Ikaw ba sa tingin mo, ikaw ang nauna?” (Wait. You think you made it first to your podium. Yaya Glo struggled to explain at the ALDUB 3rd ALDUB EB Awards episode. “I think I deserve the …” Donya Tinidora didn’t let Yaya Glo finish. She turned her attention to Yaya In “Ikaw? Sa tingin mo?” (What do you think?) Yaya In was honest though. “After Yaya Glo, I’m in.”

The audience knew who was Donya Tinidora’s bet as early at the ALDUB 37th Weeksary episode though. “Eh papano naman si Yaya Pak?” (How about Yaya Pak?) Yaya Pak sounded irate. “Eh papano yan? Nauna na sila diyan. Tapos bigla.” (How about that? They made it first. Then suddenly.) Donya Tinidora interrupted Yaya Pak too at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Kausapin mo sila.” (Talk to them.) Yaya Pak started growling. “Rawr! Di pa pala kayo tapos.” (You’re not done yet.)

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Donya Tinidora almost scolded Yaya Git for getting her uniform wrong. “Ikaw naman. Kulang kulang pa yang mga nakalagay sa yo.” (And you. You lack the accessories.) Yaya Git repeated her alibi at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode earlier. “Kala ko kasi yung pinakamahuli yung panalo. Hindi pala.” (I thought whoever made it last wins. Not after all.) Donya Tinidora asked. “Kaya binagalan mo?” (So you slowed it down?) Yaya Git replied. “Oo.” (Yes.)

Donya Tinidora told Yaya Git to complete the chambermaid ensemble. “Kunin mo muna yung mga nasa gamit mo.” (Get your things.) Yaya Git was allowed to complete the chambermaid ensemble despite making it last. The uniform’s color reminded Donya Tinidora of someone not present at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode.. “Ayan. Nahuli tuloy si Barney.” (Barney got late.)

Donya Tinidora obviously enjoyed watching the contenders. “Alam nyo, napakaganda ng challenge na ibibigay. Nakita namin kung gaano kayo kasipag. Sino nauna?” (You know, the challenge given was amazing. We saw how industrious are you. Who made it first?) Bossing Vic relayed the observation at the Broadway Centrum. “Si Yaya Glo daw, sabi ng mga tao rito.” (According to the people here, it’s Yaya Glo.)

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Donya Tinidora repeated Divina’s claim. “Yaya Glo ang nauna. Pero may mga technical pa tayo.” (Yaya Glo made it first. But we still have some technical dispute here.) Lola Nidora noted the footage to be reviewed. “Ire-review pa natin yung ginawa nila.” (We have to review what they did.) Donya Tinidora killed some time by talking to Yaya Git at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Sa tingin mo ba, papayag ka na matatalo ka sa laban na to?” (You think, you can allow yourself to lose in this fight?) Yaya Git replied. “Siempre hindi.” (Of course not.)

Donya Tinidora asked. “Bakit?” (Why?) Yaya Git’s answer was bitchy. “Sumabay ka pa.” (Try me.) Donya Tinidora didn’t like Yaya Git’s snarky tone at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ay naku! Lumalaban sa amo.” (Oh my! She fights her boss back.) Yaya Git was snapped back to reality. “Ay sori po. Sori po.” (I’m sorry. I’m sorry.) Yaya Pak had to intervene albeit with a tinge of name-calling. “Wag mo sila sinasagot, Kung Fu Panda.” (Don’t talk back at them like that, Kung Fu Panda.)

Donya Tinidora almost snapped. “Eto kasi. Nakikipagsigawan sa amo. Pangaralan mo.” (It’s her fault. She’s yelling back at her boss. Preach!) Yaya Pak did as she was told albeit not part of the challenge at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Oo nga. Wag kang ganyan, Majin Buu. Kung naka-pink ka, ganyan talaga.” (Yes. Don’t do that, Majin Buu. If you’re in pink, it really happens.) Yaya Git replied with some name-calling too. “Hoy! Hoy, Sakuragi!”

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Yaya Git may be the last to reach her podium. But she was the most tired. She asked Donya Tinidora. “Kelangan ko po ng pagkain. Pang-energy lang.” (I need food. For energy.) Lola Nidora set aside Yaya Git’s request at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Bago yung pagkain. Hindi pa natatapos itong challenge. Meron pang pangalawa.” (Before having food. You haven’t finished the challenge. There’s still a second one.)

Donya Tinidora tried scaring the contenders. “Okay. Ilabas yung mga cobra.” (Release the cobras.) Divina had to mention the disclaimer at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Biro lang. Biro lang.” (Just kidding. Just kidding.) Lola Nidora had to speak up. “Sunod na challenge naman tayo. Eto ang mental challenge.” (Let’s go to the next challenge. This is the mental challenge.)

Donya Tinidora realized where they are. “Naku. Malapit tayo dun ha?” (We’re just close by.) Donya Tinidora is referring to the National Center for Mental Health in Mandaluyong City. Lola Nidora wasn’t referring to that institution though. “Hindi.” (No.) Donya Tinidora had to verify if a written exam is present at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ate, wag mong sabihing mage-exam pa sila.” (Don’t tell me they’d end up having an exam.)

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Lola Nidora disagreed. “Hindi. Hindi sla mage-exam. Siempre. Bukod sa magiging mabilis kumilos sa bahay, gusto ko yung makukuhang papalit kong yaya ay mabilis din mag-isip. Mabilis mag-decision para maaasahan. Okay ba sa inyo yun?” (No. They’re not having an exam. Of course. Apart from being quick at home, I’d like the replacement nanny to be a quick thinker too. A quick decision-maker to be reliable. Is that okay with you?) All contenders at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode agreed. “Okay po. Okay po.”

Lola Nidora detailed the mental challenge at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Para sa susunod nating challenge. Kayong apat ay magdedebate kayo para sa search for the next yaya 2016.” (For the next challenge. All four will debate for the Search for the Next Yaya 2016.) It was then implied that it’s almost a parody of the PiliPinas Debates 2016. The one that had 4 contenders. Except that no one is directly parodying any of the presidential candidates.

Donya Tinidora realized how hard it can get. “Naku. Mahirap yan.” (That’s hard.) At the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards. Lola Nidora didn’t thnk so. “Madali lang. Meron kaming tanong o isyu na kailangan nyong sagutin. Bibigyan namin kayo ng 30 seconds para sumagot. Pag narinig nyo ang bell, time is up.” (It’s easy. We have questions or issues that you need to respond to. We will give you 30 seconds to answer. Once you hear the bell, time is up.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Donya Tinidora implied some leniency at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “At may pagkakataon din kayong maipahayag ang inyong nararamdaman sa inyong mga kasamang kasambahay.” (And you have the opportunity to express yourself to your fellow domestic helpers.) Divina echoed Donya Tinidora’s statement. “Puede kayong mag-comment bilang debate nga ito.” (You may comment as this is a debate.)

Donya Tinidora mentioned that some order would still be in place. “Pero sasabihin namin na mag-comment. Kagaya ng iba, magtaas ng kamay kung sino ang gustong mag-comment. At puedeng puede ka na diyan.” (But we will tell you when to comment. Like the others, raise your hand whoever wanted to comment.) Yaya Git was too distracted at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode though. “Nagugutom po ako.” (I’m hungry.)

Donya Tinidora had to tell it like it is. “Hay naku. Ang comment namin sa yo, mamatay ka diyan sa gutom. Walang pagkain dito. Challenge nga.” (Our comment to you is die starving. There’s no food here. That’s why it’s a challenge.) Donya Tinidora, along with Lola Nidora and Divina, turned to the rest of the contenders at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Simulan na natin ang The Search for the Next Yaya Debate 2016.” (Let’s start The Search for the Next Yaya Debate 2016.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Lola Nidora motioned the contenders to come closer. “Lumapit kayo sa inyong mga mikropono.” (Come closer to your microphones.) Donya Tinidora signaled for the first question. “Ang unang topic.” Lola Nidora read the first topic at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Kung ikaw ay magiging panlinis sa bahay, ano ka at bakit?” (If you will be a house cleaning tool, what is it and why?) Divina gave the floor to the first contender. “Yaya In!”

Yaya In maximized the 30 seconds that she was given at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ako po ay magiging vacuum. Dahil po ang vacuum, kahit saang sulok. Puede pong higupin ang mga dumi. At kahit po hanggang sa mga kasuluk-sulukan ang hihigupin ko. Yung mga libag. Kaya ko rin pong higupin ng aking vacuum. Kung ako po ay magiging vacuum. Kasi all around po siya. Puede po siya sa bubong. Puede po siya sa sahig. Puede sa dingding. Puede din po sa mga CR. Puede rin po sa labas ng bahay nyo.”

(I will be a vacuum. Because a vacuum, in any corner. It can suck all of the dirt. And no matter how cornered, I will suck it. All of the grime. It can be sucked by my vacuum. If I will be a vacuum. Because it’s an all-around tool. It can be used at the rooftop. It can be used on the floor. It can be used on the wall. It can also be used on the toilet room. It can also be used outside your house.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya Pak raised her hand to interrupt Yaya In. “Saglit lang. Saglit lang. Gusto kong magsalita.” (A moment please. A moment please. I want to speak.) Donya Tinidora gave the next opportunity to speak to Yaya Pak. “Ikaw, Yaya Pak.” Yaya Pak tried to maximize her time at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode too.

“Ang daming paliwanag ni Yaya In diyan sa vacuum cleaner. Dahil ako vacuum cleaner din. Tama nga. Mabisa nga. Pero ang maganda niyan sa vacuum cleaner na yan, pag nasira, bilang bagong yaya nyo, puede pong gamitin ang aking bibig. Dahil mabisa po itong panghigop ng mga alikabok at kung anu-ano pang mga dumi.”

(Yaya In’s explanation on the vacuum cleaner was too much. Because I am a vacuum cleaner too. Correct. It’s effective. But the good thing about that vacuum cleaner is, if it’s broken, as your new nanny, you can use my mouth. Because it’s an effective sucker for all of the dust and all kinds of dirt.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya In complained against Yaya Pak. “Gaya gaya ka.” (You copied my answer.) Yaya Git went forward with her reply at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Panghigop ba? Sample nga ng panghigop.” (You mean sucker? Let me hear a sample.) Yaya In seconded the motion. “Sige nga.” (Go ahead.) Yaya Pak then tried to make the sound of a vacuum cleaner. Yaya Git was not impressed. “Yun lang pala panghigop mo.” (So that’s your all your vacuum sound was.)

Lola Nidora somewhat dared Yaya Git then. “Bakit? Ikaw, Yaya Git?” (How about you, Yaya Git?) Yaya Git found this part in the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode as another opportunity to brag. “Sa kin, turbo. Turbo ito.” (My vacuum is turbo. This is turbo.) She then imitated the sound of a vacuum cleaner. She ended up sounding like a carburetor. “O kaya mo yun?” (Can you do that?)

Donya Tinidora let Yaya Git have the spotlight that she asked for in the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. She made Yaya Git pretend like a vacuum cleaner that works with a turn knob. “Number 1 lang muna. Konti lang alikabok.” (Level 1 of the knob first. For the few dust.) Yaya Git sounded like a vacuum cleaner again. Donya Tinidora added instructions as if Yaya Git was a voice-operated vacuum cleaner. “Eh kung makakapal na yung alikabok na gagamitan.” (Now the dust has thickened.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya Git’s vacuum sounds didn’t change much. Donya Tinidora intensified the situation provided at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ngayon. Nagpunta ako sa garden. Kelangan yung mga alikabok dun at mga putik, tanggalin ko na. 3.” (Now. I went to the garden. I need to remove the dust and mud there.) Yaya Git’s vacuum sounded more like a choke. Donya Tinidora immediately got the drift. “Pumutok na yun. Nag-overheat.” (The vacuum has imploded.)

Yaya In then would like to change her answer. “Alam ko na. Alam ko na.” (Now I know. Now I know.) Donya Tinidora chose to move on to the last contended though. “Pakinggan naman natin. Sandali. Pakinggan naman natin ito. Wala pang sinasabi itong si Yaya Glo.” (Now let’s listen. Wait. Let’s listen to her. Yaya Glo hasn’t said anything yet.) Yaya Glo then tried to answer the question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Okay. The three of you. Very well said. But for me, I will go in the main sure thing. And that will use broom.”

Donya Tinidora thought that Yaya Glo was imitating the automotive’s sound. “Broom? Motor?” Lola Nidora understood it better though. “Ah, walis.” (The broom.) Yaya Glo elaborated her reply at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Because broom, not only can clean inside. But also outside. And you know the stick of the broom? The broom. When there is not good heart, kidnapper. We’ll use the stick to fight for them for you. So I think I should be … I should be in this place.”

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya Glo’s English may be broken. But Donya Tinidora understood Yaya Glo’s point at the ALDUB 3d EB Awards episode. “Ah. Ipaglalaban niya daw. Kasi puede daw panghampas.” (She said that she would fight for us. Because you can hit [robbers with the broom’s handle].) Lola Nidora liked Yaya Glo’s answer. “Puede.” (Possible.)

Yaya Git tried to outdo Yaya Glo’s answer. This despite answering the first question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode awhile ago differently. “Ako. Ako. Ako naman. Papanigan ko siya. Kung ako maging isang panlinis, gusto ko maging walis tingting.” (Me. Me. My turn. I agree with her. If I will be a cleaning tool, I want to be a stick broom.) Donya Tinidora asked. “Bakit?” (Why?)

Yaya Git tried to outdo even her earlier answer at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Isa lang sa patunay na walang laban ang kahit sinumang dumi pag isa. Walis bilang marami. At saka hindi lang siya panlinis. Isa rin siyang transportasyon. Matipid sa gas. Kasi sasakyan siya ng mga mangkukulam.” (It’s one proof that nothing can clean alone. A stick broom has many sticks. And it’s not just for cleaning. It’s also a mode of transportaion. Saves on gas. Because it’s the vehicle of witches.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya In can’t shut up. “Di ka kaya nuon.” (That [stick broom] can’t handle your weight.) Yaya Pak thought of a better cleaning tool analogy for Yaya Git at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Yaya Git, hindi bagay sa yo ang walis o washing machine. Okay? Ang bagay sa yo, sponge. Dahil ikaw si Spongebob.” (You don’t fit the profile of a broom or a washing machine. You are more like a sponge. Because you are Spongebob.)

Donya Tinidora finally allowed Yaya In to butt in again. “Meron naman si Yaya In.” (Yaya In has a comment.) Yaya In’s answer was more of a shade to Yaya Git at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Sabi ko nga, lahat ng lilinisin ko. Itatago ko sa kilikili ni Yaya Git. Para matago talaga at di nyo makita.” (Like what I said, all the dirt that I will clean. I will hide them under Yaya Git’s armpits. So that they will be kept and you will never see them.)

Yaya Git didn’t take Yaya In’s comment lightly. “Bakit? Anong akala mo sa kilikili ko? Tokador?” (Why? What do you think of my armpits? A closet?) Yaya In then dared Yaya Git. “Patingin.” (Let me see them.) At the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. Yaya Glo wanted to see too. “Can we see?” Neither of them got the chance. Yaya Git found the chambermaid uniform’s long sleeves helpful.

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Donya Tinidora then gave the next question. A pseudo-IQ test delivered at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ayan. Napagusapan na natin kung ano silang panlinis ng tahanan. Ngayon naman. Ang tanong natin. Kung ikaw naman si Sisa, sino ang una mong hahanapin? Si Basilio o si Crispin?” (There. Since we have discussed various cleaning tools. Now. The question is. If you are Sisa, who will you look for first? Basilio or Crispin?) Lola Nidora reminded the contenders. “Isa isa lang.” (One by one.)

Donya Tinidora chose to start at who raised her hand first. “Okay. Nauna itong si Yaya Pak.” (Yaya Pak will be first.) Yaya Pak replied to the next question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Kung saka-sakali po, ang una ko pong hahanapin ay si Basilio. Hindi si Crispin.” (If ever, I would look first for Basilio. Not Crispin.) Donya Tinidora asked. “Bakit?” (Why?) Yaya Pak replied. “Alphabetical dapat. Basilio muna bago Crispin.” (It should be alphabetical. Basilio first before Crispin.)

Yaya Git isn’t done with her dish of late lunch/early snack. “Ako. Kelangan ko ng tubig.” (I need water.) Donya Tinidora snapped back at Yaya Git for slightly violating the rules. “Bahala ka.” (You’re on your own.) Yaya Git answered the next question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode anyway. “Kung ako ang papipiliin, gusto ko si Crispy.” (If I am made to choose, I like Crispy.) Donya Tinidora corrected her. “Crispin.”

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya Git tried to start over again. “Crispin pala. Kung siya, alphabetically, sa akin chronologically arrangement.” (I mean Crispin. If Yaya Pak chose to go alphabetically, I chose the chronological arrangement?) Yaya In tried to make Yaya define what she said. “Ano yung chronologically arrangement?” Yaya Git chose to be defensive at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Inaano ka ba?” (What have I done to you?)

Donya Tinidora found Yaya Git’s defensive stance at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode as funny. “Hindi niya kayang ipaliwanag. Ikaw? Sino hahanapin mong una?” (She can’t explain. You? Who would you search first?) Yaya Glo took Donya Tinidora’s look as an implied signal to speak. “Crispin. Because of the alphabet. And the chronological. Me because of the …. The how I say it. Time-consuming like Crispin, 2. Basilio, 3. So I will go for Crispin.” Yaya Glo used syllable count in her choice.

Donya Tinidora found it impressive. “Bah! Matindi sa oras ito ha?” (She’s time-conscious, huh?) If ever there was one contender in the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode that understood the question better than any other contender, it’s Yaya In. “Ako. Ako. Wala akong hahanapin kay Crispin o Basilio. Nawawala nga ako sa sarili ko. Kaya hahanapin ko muna ang sarili ko di ba?” (Me. Me. I will find neither Crispin nor Basilio. I am not myself. So I have to find myself first, right?) Donya Tinidora realized it too. “May katwiran.” (She has a point.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya Git was really hungry. ”Mas masarap pag lutuing Crispy.” (Food is still better when Crispy.) Donya Tinidora was appalled at how hunger stunted Yaya Git’s understanding of the question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Hindi Crispy. Crispin. Pagkain na naman yang nasa utak mo. Ano masasabi mo sa gusto niya?” (It’s not Crispy. It’s Crispin. You’re thinking about food again. What do you say to what she wanted?)

The question was for Yaya Pak. “Hay naku. Napakasiba mo. Kainin mo na lang agad yan. Buti hindi ka nag-yellow.” (Oh my. You’re such a glutton. Just eat that. Good thing you’re not in a yellow outfit [anymore].) Lola Nidora heard the bell ring. “Okay. Time is up.” Donya Tinidora braced the contenders for the next question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “May isa pa. Maganda ha? Dikit ang laban.” (One more. This is good. Competition is stiff.)

Lola Nidora pulled Divina and Donya Tinidora aside for the meantime though. “Mag-usap-usap muna kami ha?” (We’d just talk it over, okay?) In hushed tones, Divina asked Lola Nidora. “Lola, may napili na po ba kayo?” (Have you made a choice?) Lola Nidora tried throwing the question at Alden too. “Ikaw, Alden?” Alden can’t make a choice at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode either. “Mahigpit po ang laban, lola. Daming mga alam.” (The competition is close, granny. They are very knowledgeable.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Lola Nidora was about to run out of questions. “Kelangan pa nating magtanong.” (We need to ask more.) Donya Tinidora liked what she saw so far at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Mahirap. Parang magagaling sila. Masisipag naman. Yung isa lang, masiba.” (It’s tough. Seems like they’re good. Industrious even. It’s just that one of them is a glutton.)

Divina feared that the Snorlax-like Yaya Git would hear Donya Tinidora. “Lola, baka marinig po kayo.” (Granny, she might hear you.) Alden knew what Divina is pertaining to. “Mukhang palaban eh.” (She looked mean.) Lola Nidora let her sister take over some of the questions at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Tinidora, bahala ka na kung ano itatanong.” (I leave to you what else to be asked.)

Alden thought of a ruse. “Lola, baka magkaalaman na lang po sa pataasan ng kamay.” (Granny, we might finally know once they raised their hands.) Donya Tinidora looked at Yaya Git while replying to Alden. “Eh pabor na siyang magtaas ng kamay ngayon.” (But she’s fine with raising her hands now.) Divina threw Alden’s retort at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards back to him. “Teka, Alden, ikaw muna.” (You do it first.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Yaya Git thought Alden was being a little too personal. “Alden, crush mo ba ako? Kanina ka pa eh.” (Do you have a crush on me? You’ve been picking on me since awhile ago.) Alden just laughed it off. Donya Tinidora then declared the next question. “Okay, eto. May tanong pa uli. Kung masusunog ka …” (Okay, here. Another question. If YOU get burned …) Lola Nidora almost laughed when Donya Tinidora pointed at Yaya Git at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Bakit naman siya?” (Why her?)

Donya Tinidora then revealed the real question. “Hindi. Kung masusunog ang mansion, sino ang una mong ililigtas at bakit? Umpisahan natin dun.” (No. If the mansion will get burned, who would you save first and why?) Yaya In was at her overzealous self again at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ako! Ako! Ako! Ako! Yaya In! Ang una kong ililigtas ay si Divina. Kasi kawawa naman si Alden kapag nawala si Divina. Pag naligtas ko na si Divina, susunduin ni Alden at ililigtas ang mga lola. That’s all. Thank you.” (Me! Me! Me! Me! Yaya In! I would save first Divina. Because I’d feel bad for Alden if Divina perishes. Once I save Divina, Alden would save the grannies.)

Divina found Yaya In’s answer as impressive. “Galing.” (Great answer.) Donya Tinidora then turned to Yaya Glo. “Okay. You next.” Yaya Glo struggled with her answer at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Me. Me. Divina also because lola has short life anyway. And … And Divina continue the legacy of the lolas. That’s why I will save younger.” Alden saw Lola Nidora’s bitter reaction. “Lola, relax lang po.” (Granny, relax.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Donya Tinidora faced Yaya Glo. “Nakalimutan mong kami ang tatanggap sa yo.” (You’ve forgotten that we will be the ones who will accept you.) Lola Nidora chose to let it go. “May point siya. Tanggapin natin.” (She has a point. Let’s just accept it.) Donya Tinidora just can’t even. “E di tanggapin mo. Di ko matanggap yan.” (Then you accept it. Not me.) Lola Nidora was resigned to her fate at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Matanda na tayo.” (We are old.) Donya Tinidora still chose to think they’d live longer. “Kahit matanda. Mahaba pa ang buhay ko.” (Even if we’re old. I still have a long life to live.)

Yaya Pak spoke once she was allowed to answer. “Alam ko namang makakaligtas po kayo dahil maliliksi kayo. Kaya ang ililigtas ko na lang po yung susi ng mansion. Para po pag nawala yung sunog, makapasok pa rin po tayo.” (I know that you can save yourselves because you are agile. So I would just save the mansion key. So once the fire is gone, we can still enter.) Yaya In became suspicious at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Sabi ko na. Akyat bahay ka talaga.” (I knew it. You’re a house robber.) Yaya Pak was sarcastic. “Talaga.” (For real.)

Yaya Git’s answer at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode was half-evil, half-tongue-in-cheek. “Ililigtas ko ang sarili ko. Pag nailigtas ko ang sarili ko, sure ako na maililigtas ko sila. At ipapasok ko ‘to sa mansion para masunog ito.” (I will save myself. Once I saved myself, I am sure that I will save them. And I will take her [Yaya Pak] in the mansion for her to burn.) Donya Tinidora checked if she heard Yaya Git right. “Sino?” (Who?) Yaya Git then adjusted her answer. “Sila pong lahat para wala na kong kalaban.” (All of them so that I no longer have any competitors.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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The fair-complexioned Yaya In tried to hit Yaya Git’s comment back to her. “Bakit ikaw? Matagal ka nang sunog.” (Why you? You’ve been burnt for so long.) Yaya Pak went further in verbally bullying Yaya Git at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Oo nga eh. Yang armpit mo. Tingnan mo oh. Yung batok niya, crispy batok.” (Yes. Your armpits. Look at them. And the back of her neck, looks toasted to a crisp.)

Donya Tinidora asked Yaya Pak. “Ano masasabi mo sa mga kalaban mo?” (What can you say about your competitors?) This is the part in the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode where Yaya Pak snapped. Again. “Ang mga kalaban ko, magagaling. Pero ang hindi ko lang maintindihan. Pag nagsasalita yung isa, kayo naman nagsasalita din. Ikaw din. Ikaw, Yaya In.” (My competitors are great. But what I don’t understand is if one speaks, you all speak too. You too, Yaya In!)

Yaya In was just as aggressive as Yaya Pak. “Sinasabi ko nga sa yo eh. Masyado ka rin namang maingay. Hindi mo naman pala kaya yung bibig ko eh.” (That’s what I’ve been telling you. You’re so noisy too. Turns out that you can’t handle my mouth.) Yaya Pak went growling at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Rawr!” Yaya In’s motor mouth refused to stop. “Bakit ba lagi ka na lang nang-aano?” (Why do you keep doing that?)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Poor Yaya Glo was left to calm down Yaya Pak and Yaya In. It didn’t help that she stood between them at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. Yaya Git quipped. “Grabe!” (Damn!) Yaya In was just nagging as opposed to Yaya Pak. “Sinasabi ko na nga sa yo! Ako ang tatanggapin dito!” (I’ve been telling you! I will be accepted here!)

Because Yaya Glo stopped Yaya Pak from physically attacking Yaya In. She turned to Yaya Git instead. “Isa ka pa! Salita ka nang salita!” (You too! You keep talking!) Yaya Git’s next line makes you wonder if the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode is the right episode for her with her wayward reply. “Wag kang magsasalita ng ganyan! Ako ang tunay mong ina!” (Don’t speak to me like that! I am your mother!)

Yaya Git made gunshot sound after pointing her finger to Yaya Pak. Yaya Pak fell as if she really got hit with a bullet. Yaya Glo wasn’t fast enough to catch her. But she managed to keep Yaya Pak’s head from hitting the concrete. Yaya In realized how Yaya Glo is the only non-confrontational contender at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Pagsalitain nyo ito ng English.” (Let her speak in English.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Divina sat down laughing her ass off at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. Yaya In then realized how bad Yaya Pak’s fall was. “Wasak ang bungo!” (She broke her skull!) Donya Tinidora found it hard to restrain the contenders. “Sandali.” (Wait.) Yaya Pak almost lost consciousness. But she got to stand up. “Ang sakit nun ha?” (That hurt.) Yaya Git mocked Yaya Pak. “Isang bala ka lang pala ha?” (So you’re just good for one bullet, huh?)

Yaya Pak resumed her verbal diarrhea. “Salita kayo ng salita. Pinagsasalita nyo ako. Debate nga ito! Dapat rawr!” (You keep talking. You let me go on talking. This is a debate!) Yaya Git repeated the gunshot sound and the hand gesture. Yaya Pak acted like she was hit. But she didn’t fall anymore. Yaya Glo might fail in catching her again at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode.

Divina can’t take it anymore. Literally can’t stand this riot. Lola Nidora was hiding from the camera to burst out laughing too. Donya Tinidora suddenly realized how fast things have happened at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Anong nangyari?” (What happened?) Yaya In stared at Yaya Pak. “Dapat yung duguan na siya.” (She should be bloodied.) Seeing how Donya Tinidora struggled in restraining the contenders. Lola Nidora had to step in upon regaining her composure. “Hoy! Hoy! Dapat hindi kayo nagaaway!” (You should not be bickering!)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Lola Nidora ended up becoming collateral damage to Yaya Pak’s verbal diarrhea at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Isa ka pa, lola. Tanda mo na. Nagsasalita ka pa ng rawr!” (You too, granny! You old hag! And you had the nerve to talk!) It got Yaya Git’s attention. “Wag mong inaaway si lola!” (Don’t yell at granny!) Yaya In saw it too. “Nagagalit sa yo, lola, oh.” (Granny got upset with you.)

Yaya Pak suddenly looked like someone splashed with ice cold water. “Pasensiya na, lola. Nakainom lang po ako.” (I’m sorry, granny. I’m just drunk.) Donya Tinidora confronted Yaya Pak at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Kapatid ko yun.” (That’s my sister.) Yaya Pak was apologetic again. “Ay sori po! Di ko alam.” (I’m sorry. I didn’t know.) Yaya Pak tried to retaliate again Yaya Git though. She made a gunshot sound. Yaya Git ignored her.

Yaya In scolded Yaya Pak. “Galangin mo si lola. Bad ka.” (Respect granny. How bad of you.) Lola Nidora was too dumb-founded to speak. Donya Tinidora had to do the talking. “Sandali. Kayo! Masyado kayong bayolente!” (Wait. You all! You’re all too violent.) Yaya Pak and the rest of the contenders apologized at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Sori po.” (Sorry.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Donya Tinidora’s blood pressure might shoot up. “Hindi puedeng ganyan. Okay, ate. Naiinis ako. Gugulpihin ko ‘tong mga ‘to.” (You can’t be like that. Elder sister. I am irritated. I’d beat the crap out of them.) Lola Nidora was more worried of Donya Tinidora’s health at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Konting tiis lang. Kung ako nga, nadadamay. Inaaway ako. Eto.” (Just a little more patience. I ended up getting dragged into the melee. I got yelled at.)

Donya Tinidora regained halfway her composure upon resuming to the Q&A. “Eto. Matinding tanong ito. English ito.” (Here is a tough question. It’s in English.) Lola Nidora looked at Yaya In. “Unahin na kita. I want an English answer. Why should we hire you, not them?” (You go first.) Yaya In slowness showed in the part of the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “English po.” Donya Tinidora confirmed Yaya In’s query. “Oo.” (Yes.)

Yaya In doesn’t sound ready. “Kelangan po ba English yung sagot sa tanong nyo kasi English po yung tanong nyo?” (Do I have to answer in English because your question is in English?) Lola Nidora replied. “Oo.” (Yes.) Yaya In pushed her luck here at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “You should hire me, mga lola and Divina, because I am super confident. And I am super … I’m not tired easily because I speak always. And always. As you can see I want to speak in always. And I want this job talaga.”

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Divina had to interfere before Yaya In stuffs her answer with fluff. “Thank you. Thank you.” Lola Nidora looked at Yaya Glo. “You’re next. Why should we hire you, not them?” Yaya Glo has the advantage. Or so it seemed at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “I think I’m good in the spot because as you can see. The three of them. They are weak. And I’m more younger. And the age. I’m more stronger. And as I say, it runs in the blood. My lola way way back. I’m a grandkid. I know how to extravagant the three of you.”

Lola Nidora was content with Yaya Glo’s answer. “Okay. Basta naintindihan ko.” (I got it.) Donya Tinidora tried to rephrase what Yaya Glo said at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Nasa dugo daw nila yung trabaho. Pagiging yaya.” (She said that housework runs in their family. Being a nanny [runs in the family].) With the 2 remaining contenders looking calm. Donya Tinidora signaled Yaya Pak to answer.

Yaya Pak’s grammar at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode turned out to be good. “Well, you should hire me because I do believe that I have the capability, ability and responsibility to take care of the amenities. And of course the utility of this society. If I will not be hired, I will join the fraternity. Rawr!” Lola Nidora was shocked with the growl. “Bakit may ganun?” (Why that growl?) Donya Tinidora explained to Lola Nidora. “Ganun talaga yung last line niya.” (It’s her signature last line.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
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Finally, Lola Nidora asked Yaya Git. “Ikaw naman. Why should we hire you, not them?” Donya Tinidora didn’t feel like letting Yaya Git answer. “Wala nang oras.” (We have no more time.) Yaya Git felt miffed again. “Ha? May problema ata kayo sa akin eh.” (What? Seems like you have a problem with me.) Lola Nidora diverted Yaya Git back to the topic. “Answer the question.”

Yaya Git’s grammar wasn’t any better than that of Yaya Glo though. “Well I am capable to be a yaya. A lifetime yaya. I very much hard work. And if you hire me yaya. You have nanny. At the same time, you have bodyguard.” Lola Nidora liked Yaya Git’s English answer at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Puede. Puede.” (Possible. Possible.) Alden tried to chide Yaya Git again. “Taas kamay. Taas kamay.” (Hands up. Hands up.)

Bossing Vic asked permission from the grannies. “Puede ba ako naman magtanong?” (May I have my turn in asking them?) Donya Tinidora gave the floor to Bossing Vic at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Si Bossing naman magtatanong. Victor, ano gusto mong itanong?” (It’s Bossing’s turn to ask. Victor, what would you like to ask?) Bossing Vic asked a classic beauty pageant parody question. “Kung mamamatay kayo bukas, ba’t di pa ngayon?” (If you’re going to die tomorrow, why not now?)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Yaya In let the other contenders answer first. “Sila na lang po mauna.” (They should go first instead. Yaya Git answered Bossing Vic’s question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Because today is not tomorrow.” She points at Yaya Pak. “But if you’re in a hurry, you can go ahead. I’ll just follow.” Yaya Pak ignored Yaya Git’s shade to answer the question instead. “Because I’m under therapy. I am sick. Cancer. Level 27.”

Yaya Glo’s answer was almost serious. “Because I think I don’t deserve it.” Donya Tinidora tried to pry further. “You always deserve di ba?” Yaya Glo elaborated her answer at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “No. I don’t deserve to kill my life. For now. Because under therapy the arm. This one [armpit]. I want to prioritize.” The therapy she’s referring to is the glutathione therapy.

Yaya In’s answer was dramatic. “Pinapatay nyo ako eh. Buti pa ang mga sinisilya electrica, pinapapili ng pagkain. Eh ako? Pinapatay nyo na ko. Mga wala kayong kwentang kapatid.” (You’re killing me. At least those who are sentenced to the electric chair are made to choose their meals. How about me? You’re killing me. You’re useless sisters!) Donya Tinidora found Yaya In’s answer very familiar. “Sandali. Dialogue ko yan eh.” (Wait. That’s my dialogue.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

It turns out that Yaya In saw the Lenten episode that featured the Zobeyala sisters. “Napanood ko po yun. I’m a fan.” (I saw it.) Donya Tinidora was impressed. “Magaling. Magaling. Palakpakan natin.” (Great. Great. Please clap for them.) Lola Nidora was just as impressed. “Magaling. Magaling kayong lahat. Nakaya nyo yung mga binigay namin sa inyong challenge.” Amazing. Amazing. You have endured the challenges that we gave you.)

Lola Nidora then had to huddle with the rest of the audition committee. “Ngayon, Tinidora, Divina. Ano decision natin?” (What’s our decision?) Donya Tinidora chose to let Lola Nidora take the pick. “Ikaw na ang bahala. Tutal, ikaw naman ang mayordoma.” (It’s up to you. You’re in charge of the mansion.) Divina can’t decide either. “Magaling po lahat, lola. Palaban po lahat.” (They were all good. All of them are in fighting form.)

Donya Tinidora thought Divina should be more proactive. “Ikaw, Divina. Kelangan meron ka rin sina-suggest. Basta ako, magu-utos lang ako ng magu-utos.” (You need to be making suggestions too. As for me, I’d just be giving orders.) Lola Nidora was visibly undecided at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Eh kasi magaling naman silang lahat. Pero hindi natin puedeng kunin kasi baka mamulubi naman tayo sa pagsahod niyan.” (They are all brilliant. But we can’t hire them all or we’d go poor in paying them their salaries.)

ALDUB 3rd EB Awards
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora thought it’s a consequence of the job hunt they staged at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Eh talagang ganun. Nagpa-audition tayo eh.” (That’s the case. We conducted an audition.) Lola Nidora asked Divina for Alden’s opinion. “Tanungin mo nga si Alden.” (Go ask Alden.) Divina relayed Lola Nidora’s message. “Alden? Ano sa tingin mo? Wag kang maingay. Baka marinig nila.” (What do you think? Don’t talk too loud. They might hear us.)

Alden had other things in mind. “Wala talaga. Ba’t di kaya magsama na lang tayong dalawa?” (Nothing at all. Why don’t we stay in one roof?) Divina was caught off-guard with Alden’s question at the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode. “Ano ba? Seryoso ito.” (What? This is serious.) Alden feared that Lola Nidora heard him. “Lola, joke lang po.” (Granny, just kidding.)

Lola Nidora diverted Alden’s attention back to the nanny audition conducted at the ALDUb 3rd EB Awards episode. “Alden? Yung mga yaya.” Alden’s answer was safe. “Magagaling po lahat.” (They were all astonishing.) Divina chose to whisper her pick to Lola Nidora. “Lola, eto po tip ko.” (Here’s my tip.) Lola Nidora in turn whispered Divina’s choice to Donya Tinidora. Donya Tinidora liked it.

Lola Nidora was then expected to declare the chosen nanny. “Magaling kayong lahat. Pero ang napili namin manalo para sa Search for the Next Yaya 2016 ay si …” (You were all brilliant. But our chosen winner for the Search for the Next Yaya 2016 is ….) The truck horn honked off. Ending the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode on a cliffhanger.

With the decision implied as unanimous, who could it be? Tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode replay. Subscribe to their official YouTube channel for the KalyeSerye playlists.

Ruby felt short-changed. “Bitin.” Bossing Vic half-expected it. “Sabi na nga ba eh.” (I knew it.) What lies ahead of the upcoming KalyeSerye episodes after the ALDUB 3rd EB Awards episode? Like our official Facebook page, The Philippines Web. Episode recaps are posted there. Follow us on Twitter @pinasamazing. We’d be expecting you.