ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama: ANSERA Volume 7

The ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode opened with a rather sweet number. A DUBsmash performance by Donya Tidora to the tune of Jim Brickman’s “The Gift”. She didn’t DUBsmash the male part of the song though. That was done by the man [not seen] who gave her flowers and a paper bag of food. Donya Tidora was so happy to accept both. She quickly walked towards her sisters.

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Tinidora immediately saw Donya Tidora come close to their table. “Kumusta ka na? Ang tagal mong nawala.” (How are you? You’ve been away for so long.) Donya Tidora was just as happy to see them again at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Mga sisters. Kumusta na kayo?” (How are you both?) Lola Nidora gladly replied. “Eto. Okay lang kami. Halika’t umupo at kumain na tayo. Nakapagsupot kami ng pagkain galing sa kasal.” (Here. We’re okay. Come and sit and let’s eat. We packed some food from the wedding.) They still have some food left from the Vic-Pauleen wedding featured at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode.

Donya Tidora saw the packed lunch as focused by the camera at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode.“Ah ito yung galing sa kasal.” (So these are from the wedding reception.) Donya Tinidora confirmed Donya Tidora’s quip. “Oo. Ito yung galing sa kasal. (Yes. From the wedding reception.) Donya Tinidora then turned her attention to Lola Nidora. “Ate? Hindi kita nakita sa picture sa kasal, ate. Bakit wala ka dun?” (I didn’t see you at the wedding photos. How come you’re not there?)

Donya Tidora remembered it too. “Oo nga.” (Yes indeed.) Lola Nidora tried to find her alibi at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Eh kasi naman …” Allan K confirmed seeing someone else. “Andun si Wally.” (Wally was there.) Donya Tinidora reiterated Allan K’s statement. “Andun si Wally. Wala ka dun.” (Wally was there. You’re not.) Lola Nidora clarified her presence at the wedding. “Andun ako. Eh walang tumawag sa akin. Nakatulog ako.” (I was there. But nobody called me [when it’s photoshoot time]. I fell asleep.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Tinidora chided Lola Nidora further. “Ate, kitang kita kita dun. Kung makaiyak ka, akala mo ikaw yung magulang nung ikakasal.” (I can see you clearly there. You cry as if you’re the parent of the one getting wed.) Donya Tidora was a little surprised. “Talaga? Umiyak ito?” (Really? She cried?) Lola Nidora downplayed the tears she shed at the wedding. “Ano ba? Naiyak ako sa tuwa. Tuwang iyak yun. Hayaan nyo na ako.” (What now? I cried out of joy. They’re happy tears. Let me be.)

Lola Nidora had to remind Donya Tidora. “Teka nga muna. Tidora. Kumusta yung pinaayos ko sa yo?” (Wait, Tidora. Any updates on the errand I asked you to do?) Donya Tidora shared a little at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Ate, ang dami dami pa palang aayusin na papeles para maibenta natin yung farm sa Zambales. Kailangan pa natin ng malaking halaga para pambayad dun sa mga abogado.” (Elder sister, there are still so many documents to process to sell our farm in Zambales. We need a large amount to pay the lawyer.)

Lola Nidora is cash-strapped herself as of the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Anong gagawin natin? Alam mong makakatulong yan para makakuha tayo ng medyo maganda-gandang bahay. At para sa mga pangangailangan natin. Pero ang dasal ko talaga ay maibalik sa atin yung mansion. Pero mukhang malabo na.” (What will we do? You know that it will help in order for us to get a decent home. And for our needs. But I’m really praying that the mansion be returned to us.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Tidora comforted her sister. “Ate, ayan ka na naman eh. Habang may buhay, may pag-asa.” (Here you go again. While there is still life, there is hope.) Donya Tinidora agreed. “Tama. Nasaan nga pala si Divina?” (Correct. Where is Divina by the way?) Lola Nidora addressed Divina’s absence at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Pauwi na yun. May report daw sa school. May inaayos sa klase.” (She’s on her way home. She said she’s got to report in class. She had to arrange something.) Donya Tinidora thought otherwise. “Nagbabakasyon na ha?” (Taking time off, huh?)

Donya Tinidora took the opportunity to get the story continued at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Naalala ko yung kwento ha? Akala ko masaya yung Sabado. Pero biglang dumating yung si Mama.” (I remembered the story huh? I thought it’s already fun last Saturday [ANSERA Volume 6]. But Mama suddenly arrived.) Donya Tidora was perplexed. “Ha?” Donya Tinidora tried to pack the story as quick as possible to Donya Tidora. “Ang ganda na. Nagsasayawan na eh.” (It was already going great. There was dancing.)

Donya Tidora checked if she heard Donya Tinidora right at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Dumating si Mama?” (Mama came?) Donya Tinidora confirmed it. “Yung kwento ni ate. Nagbabasa siya. Kinukwento niya. Eh ang ganda na ng kwento. Nagsasayawan na sila dun sa caracol. Biglang dumating ngayon si Mama. Ang sungit ni Mama. Ang salbahe ni Mama.” (That is according to elder sister’s story. She read it. She narrated it. The story already was great. They were dancing at the venue. Then Mama arrived. Mama was mean. Mama was savage.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Tidora tried to mention Donya Ariana’s positive attributes. “Pero maganda di ba?” (But she’s beautiful, right?) Donya Tinidora disagreed at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Hindi rin. Alam mo ang tao, kahit gaano kaganda, pumapangit pag pangit ang ginagawa.” (No. A person, no matter how beautiful, becomes ugly whenever their deeds are ugly.) This was consistent to Lola Nidora’s claim in the ALDUB Love On Top episode that Donya Tidora was their parents’ favorite child. Donya Tinidora still remembered how Donya Ariana mentioned her at ANSERA Volume 6 like a topic worth sweeping under the rug.

Donya Tidora remembered the main attribute she got from their mother. “Mana ako kay Mama eh.” (I inherited it from mom.) Donya Tinidora thought Donya Tidora is referring to Donya Ariana’s bad genes. “Yung masama ugali?” (The mean streak?) Donya Tidora clarified at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode which genes though. “Hindi. Yung ganda.” (No. The beauty.) Allan K acknowledged their similarities as mother and daughter. “Carbon copy ka nga ng Mama n’yo eh.” (You are your Mama’s clone.) Donya Tidora mentioned an actress that looked a little like Donya Ariana though. “Bumi-Bing Loyzaga. Ganun.” (She reminds me of Bing Loyzaga [mole-wise].)

Donya Tinidora went back to pestering Lola Nidora at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Ate?” (Elder sister?) It took awhile before Lola Nidora snaps back to the present day. “Alam nyo ba, mga sister, pag ako’y nalulungkot, binabalikan ko ang mga alaalang dala ni Anselmo nung sumasayaw kami sa baile. Kung minsan, may mga alaala tayo ng ating nakaraan na nakakagaan ng ating kasalukuyan.” (You know, sisters, whenever I am sad, I look back to the memories of the dance party with Anselmo. Sometimes, we have memories that make light of our present situation.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Halfway through Lola Nidora’s nostalgia, the events at the dance party in ANSERA Volume 6 are shown onscreen. It reminded Boss Joey of another classic love team made famous by their dance shows. “Parang Nida-Nestor.” (Just like the days of Nida Blanca and Nestor de Villa.) Lola Nidora recalled being with Anselmo. “Yung panahon na sumasayaw kami ni Anselmo. Sana tumigil na lang ang mundo.” (At that time when I danced with Anselmo. I wished that the world would stop spinning.) Allan K expressed in the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode how great Nidora was as a dancer. “Lola, ang galing mo dun sa boojie.” (Granny, you were great at dancing boogie.)

Donya Tidora soon heard music even where she sat. “Ayan o! Naririnig ko na. Mag-boojie ka nga. Patingin.” (There! I can hear it. Do the boogie. Let me see it.) Donya Tinidora doesn’t remember the steps that much though as of the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Paano ba yung boojie mo?” (How was your boogie again?) Lola Nidora summed it up best through her feelings. “Nakakakilig at ang saya saya.” (It gets me giddy and so much fun.)

Donya Tinidora can’t help but observe though. “Alam mo, nung bata ka pa, mahaba ang biyas mo. Umiksi ha?” (You know, when you were young, you had long legs. They got shorter, huh?) Donya Tidora’s heart-stopped upon seeing Lola Nidora’s death-defying dance move for the first time in the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “AY!” KalyeSerye commentator Ryan was optimistic that it can be done again though. “Tingin ko, kaya pa ni Lola yan.” (I think granny can still do that.) Boss Joey disagreed. “Hindi na kaya. Maiksi na ang biyas niyan eh.” (No she can’t. Her legs have gotten shorter.)

Mr And Mrs Sotto

Donya Tidora is already worried if Lola Nidora can even do the cartwheel at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode now. “May cartwheel. Kaya mo?” (Can you still do the cartwheel?) Lola Nidora had to be honest. “Hindi na.” (Not anymore.) Allan K suggested trying to dance the boogie again just to check. “Pasayaw nyo kay Rogelio.” (Make the Rogelio dance with you.) Lola Nidora got even more skeptical herself. “Baka itapon lang ako niyan. Saka delikado.” (They might throw me around. And it’s dangerous.)

Donya Tidora thought of her sister’s age too. “Malulutong na kasi ang mga buto mo ngayon. Ang galing mong sumayaw nun ha?” (Your bones have gotten brittle now. You danced great though, huh?) Albeit happy, Lola Nidora tried to divert the topic. “Kumain kayo.” (Come eat.) Donya Tidora can still hear the boogie music. “Sumayaw daw tayo. Ayan na yung boojie oh. Ate, turuan mo kaming mag-boojie.” (They’re asking us to dance. The boogie music is there. Teach us how to boogie.) Donya Tinidora called on the Rogelio’s. “Isayaw nyo si ate.” (Dance with elder sister.) It took Lola Nidora to call all of them at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Rogelio Rogelio Rogelio! O tatatlo kayo. Tig-iisa tayo.” (There’s 3 of you. We [sisters] should have a partner each.)

Ryan saw the most muscular Rogelio go with Lola Nidora. “Yan! Kaya kayong ibalibag niyan, ‘la.” (There! She can throw you around, granny.) Lola Nidora tries to cartwheel but stops upon seeing the hesitation in Rogelio’s face. “Mukhang hindi ako sasaluhin nito eh.” (He doesn’t look like he’ll catch me.) Donya Tidora partnered with the slim Rogelio. She also saw Donya Tinidora slap the latter’s partner at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Isa pang sampal. Hindi nakita.” (One more slap. It wasn’t shown on the camera.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Turns out that Donya Tinidora’s old habits die hard. She may be dancing with a Rogelio instead of one of the Cuando Cuando Cuando. But she’s still the slapping kind of dancing partner. “Um! Sadista ako nung araw!” (I used to be a sadist!) Donya Tinidora may be dancing. But she can still see Lola Nidora dance still. “Okay! Talon, ate!” (Jump!) Lola Nidora did. But she can’t bring herself to cartwheel at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. Also, Rogelio did not even lift her up to set the stunt. She almost scolded the bodyguard. “Niyakap mo lang ako eh.” (You just hugged me.)

All sisters were dancing at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode when the phone rang. Donya Tinidora was the first to hear it. “Me tumatawag.” (Someone’s calling.) Lola Nidora thought that it’s her phone. Donya Tidora checked her phone too and it was hers that rung. She quickly answered it. “Hello?” Donya Tinidora found Donya Tidora’s tone in answering the phone ay a little too effeminate.

Donya Tidora didn’t hear Donya Tinidora. “Yes, attorney? Ah sige, papunta na ko diyan. Dala ko na yung mga cedula at resibo ng mga amelyar. O sige, bye.” (Okay. I’m on my way there. I already have the community residence certificate and the real estate tax receipts.) Donya Tidora finished the call and excused herself. “Ate, aalis muna ako.” (I have to go.) Donya Tinidora tried to stop Donya Tidora at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Sandali lang. Kararating mo lang. Aalis ka na naman?” (Wait. You just arrived. You’re leaving again?) Donya Tidora replied. “Naghihintay pa si attorney.” (The lawyer is waiting.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Unfazed, Donya Tinidora tried to make Donya Tidora stay by holding her. “Dito ka muna. Kakain pa tayo.” (Stay here. We have to eat.) Donya Tidora tried to let go. “Kelangan kong ayusin itong mga papeles.” (I need to process the papers.) Lola Nidora reminded Donya Tinidora of Donya Tidora’s errand. “Hayaan mo na. At nang magawa na ang mga papeles na yan.” (Let her be. So that she may process those documents.) Donya Tinidora refused to let her sister leave the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Ate, wala akong katulong makinig. Puro ako na lang ang nakikinig dito.” (I don’t have anyone with me to listen. I’m the one who’s doing all the listening.)

Donya Tidora tried to boost Donya Tinidora’s confidence. “Kaya mo yan. Sandali lang ‘to.” (You can do it. I won’t take long.) Donya Tinidora started sounding more like Ging Ging by the minute. “Dito ka na. Wag ka nang umalis.” (Stay here. Don’t go.) Seeing that Donya Tinidora still held Donya Tidora’s hand, Donya Tidora broke the fourth wall in a funny way. “Dito ako magbibihis.” (I’ll dress up here [as Donya Ariana].) Everyone was laughing when Donya Tinidora finally let go of Donya Tidora at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode.

Donya Tidora still tried to promise to Donya Tinidora. “Babalik din ako agad. Sige.” (I’d be back in a jiffy. Okay.) Donya Tinidora broke the fourth wall too. “Sige. Sige. Magiingat ka ha? Babagalan ko lang ang mga tanong.” (Okay. Okay. Take care, huh? I’d slow down on the questions.) Donya Tinidora was referring to the conversation in the Sugod Bahay segment. It would give Paolo Ballesteros ample time in the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode to change outfits.

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Tinidora then turned to Lola Nidora. “Ate, basahin mo na uli yung diary.” (Start reading the diary.) Lola Nidora opened the diary as requested. “O sige.” (Okay.) Lola Nidora was checking the page where she stopped when Donya Tinidora changed her mind. “Mag-Sugod Bahay muna tayo. Para mamaya, dere-derecho na yung babasahin mo.” (Let’s go to our Sugod Bahay errand first. So that later, you can narrate without continuously [at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode].)

Lola Nidora considered the advice shared at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode as sound advice. “Para hindi na mapuputol.” (So that there will be no interruption.) Donya Tinidora then aired her biggest beef with the way Lola Nidora narrated her diary. “Kung kelan nasa kagandahan, binibitin mo kami eh. Kita mo ‘to. Sinasadya mo talaga eh. Gusto kong malaman anong nangyari sa inyo. Anong nangyari sa sakit ni Anselmo? Si YayaMot, ginulpi ba?” (Just when it starts getting better, you leave us hanging. Look at you. You’re being deliberate. I want to know what happened to you. What happened to Anselmo’s disease? Was YayaMot beaten up again?)

Donya Tinidora has all of these questions. And Lola Nidora only has this to say to set the tone at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Napakasakit ng ginawa sa akin ni Mama. Naging mapusok ako. Naging malupit naman si Mama. Hindi talaga kami magkakaintindihan.” (What Mama did to me was painful. I was raging with hormones. And Mama was cruel. We didn’t meet halfway.) Being the sadist that she is. Donya Tinidora admitted enjoying seeing Beyonce a.k.a. YayaMot. “Gusto ko yung ginugulpi si YayaMot.” (I like how YayaMot gets beaten up.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Lola Nidora felt bad for the closest thing she ever had to a nanny 70 years ago. “Kawawa naman si YayaMot.” (I feel bad for YayaMot.) Donya Tinidora doesn’t share the same sentiment at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Hindi. Okay lang. Ang ganda nga kaya nung ganun.” (No. It’s okay. It’s awesome to see it that way.) [The woman who played Beyonce, Anne Boleche a.k.a. Hopia, was a constant butt of jokes among the resident dancers of Eat Bulaga.] Lola Nidora and Donya Tinidora were off to the next Sugod Bahay winner while waiting for the ANSERA characters to get dressed.

After distributing prizes and entertainment on their next Sugod Bahay winner. Lola Nidora started opening her diary at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Makinig ka na.” (Listen up.) Donya Tinidora is all set. “Nakikinig na ako. Dalawa lang naman tayo dito, ate.” (I am listening. It’s just the 2 of us here.) Boss Joey had to check though. “Hindi pa ba bumabalik si Tidora?” (Has Tidora returned?) Donya Tinidora then complained. “Ang tagal tagal nga.” (She took forever to come back.) Lola Nidora excused Donya Tidora in the latter’s behalf. “Hinatid nga yung cedula at yung amelyar.” (She handled the community residence certificate and the real estate tax receipts.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Once everyone is set for the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode narration. Lola Nidora began. “Dear Diary. Unang araw ngayon ng Pebrero. Pero lubos na nagluluksa ang puso ko sa pagkawalay ko sa aking irog na si Anselmo. Susuko na ba ako? O ipaglalaban pa ba ang pag-ibig namin? Sa bawat hampas at suntok ng mga tauhan ni Mama, parang ako na rin ang binubuntal nila. Kayanin man namin ang sakit ng katawan. Pero ang sakit ng puso ay parang maliliit na tinik na unti-unting tumutusok sa aming buong pagkatao. Bakit ganun ang pag-ibig? Ikulong man ako ni Mama, ang puso ko’y mananatiling kapiling si Anselmo.”

(It’s the first day of February. But my heart is in deep mourning for getting uprooted from my beloved Anselmo. Should I give up? Or should I keep on fighting for our love? For every blow and punch by Mama’s henchmen, it seems as if they’re punching me too. Even if the body endures the pain. Heartaches are like little thorns that seep little by little into our very being. Why is love like that? Even if Mama locked me up, my heart will continuously be with Anselmo.)

Nidora is locked up some place that the audience would find darker than usual. She prayed the rosary in silence. Anselmo is shown at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode DUBsmashing to “Bituing Marikit” by Ric Manrique. Nidora inadvertently replied by DUBsmashing to “Saan Ka Man Naroroon” by Pilita Corales. Anselmo DUBsmashed again. This time to the tune of “Ang Tangi Kong Pag-Ibig” by Diomedes Maturan. Nidora DUBsmashed too. Hers was “Dahil Sa Yo” by [according to Boss Joey] Armida Siguion Reyna.

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Anselmo is pacing around the room when someone arrived. “Pepito. Insan.” Pepito got worried for his cousin. “Hindi ka ba pupunta sa bukid? Tanghali na.” (Aren’t you going to the farm? The sun is up.) Anselmo tried to commit though. “Susunod ako. Magpapalakas lang dahil medyo masakit pa ang aking ulo.” (I’d be following suit. I just need to regain my strength since my head still hurt.)

It didn’t mention if the community knew about Anselmo’s incident with Donya Ariana. But Pepito gave Anselmo something to regain his strength. “Eto. Pinadala ni Nanay itong gatas na ito. Magpalakas ka daw. At dun ka na raw sa amin mananghalian.” (Here. Mother sent it for this [bottle of carabao’s] milk. She told you to get healthy. And have some lunch at home too.) Anselmo appreciated Pepito’s efforts. “Salamat, insan.” (Thanks, cousin.)

Lola Nidora longed for Anselmo at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Sabik na sabik na ako kay Anselmo. Ipinipikit ko lang ang mata ko tuwing maaalala ko siya. Alam namin na kayang kaya namin. Kaya tuwing tanghali, ipinipikit namin ang aming mga mata at iniisip ang isa’t isa. Iniisip namin na magkapiling kami. Iniisip namin na kami’y magkatabi.” (I am so excited for Anselmo. I just have to close my eyes whenever I remember him. We know that we can really do it. So every noontime, we close our eyes and think of each other. We think that we are together. We think that we are beside each other.) Another “magic realism” moment in the ANSERA saga like what happened in the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Tinidora liked the premise though. “Ate, ang ibig sabihin pala nun, sabay kayong pumipikit. Parang split-screen lang.” (It means you close your eyes together. Just like a split-screen.) Lola Nidora confirmed Donya Tinidora’s hunch at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Ganun na nga, Tinidora. Puede mong gawin yun.” (Exactly, Tinidora. You can do that too.) Donya Tinidora had to ask to be safe though. “Iisipin ko lang?” (I just have to think it?) Lola Nidora agreed. “Para kahit magkalayo kayo, sa takdang oras, titigil kayong dalawa at ang isa’t isa lang ang iisipin.” (So that even if you are apart, at the designated time, you will both stop and just think of each other.)

Donya Tinidora now loves the process. “Maganda pala yun. Masubukan ko nga. Kaya lang, baka maisip namin, patay na kami. Hindi na ako makakadilat.” (It turned out to be good. I should try it. But we might mutually think that we’re dead. I might not open my eyes again.) Lola Nidora didn’t think so. “Hindi. Diyan ang connection ng puso. Walang malayo. Walang pader. Walang posas. Walang harang. Ituloy ko?” (No. That’s the connection of the heart. Nothing’s far. No walls. No handcuffs. No obstacles. Shall I continue?) Donya Tinidora prodded Lola Nidora at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Tuloy mo.” (Continue.)

Lola Nidora started. “Dear Diary.” Donya Tinidora got distracted at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode again. “Uy, bago yan! Sino si Diary?” (That’s new. Who’s Diary?) Lola Nidora reminded Donya Tinidora of how diary entries usually begin.) “Hindi. Ito yung diary.” (No. Just this diary.) Lola Nidora then resumed reading out loud. “Parang may nararamdaman ako sa katawan ko. Siguro dahil sa pagkakakulong sa akin ng Mama.” (I feel something in my body. Maybe an effect of getting locked up by Mama.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Donya Ariana was at the living room when she called out her maid at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Beyonce. Huling pagkakataon mo na ito, Beyonce. Pag hindi mo inayos ang trabaho mo, pati pamilya mo, pati EB Babes, papalayasin ko kayo sa hacienda! Kailangan hindi na sila makapag-usap ni Anselmo.” (This is your last chance. If you failed to brush up on your job, I would send you, your family and the rest of the EB Babes out of the farm! They must never speak to each other of Anselmo again!)

Beyonce spotted the inconsistency in Donya Ariana’s statements. Her English has minor improvement too. “I thought you don’t want Nidora to bite mosquitoes. You want her in the aircon. So why arrest her, Senyora? Why you have to put her in the stockroom?” Donya Ariana beat up Beyonce again for being too meddlesome in the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. Boss Joey partly blamed the maid’s overzealousness. “Sagot pa kasi ng sagot.” (She kept talking back.)

Donya Ariana scolded Beyonce a.k.a. YayaMot again. “Pakialamera ka ha?” (How meddlesome of you!) Beyonce could only complain. “You’re very hurting, Senyora. Violence is bad. Parental guidance. Keep this in mind. What you’re doing is against the RA 9262 law. Anti Violence Against Women and Children Act of 2004.” This was more like the KalyeSerye crew’s reaction to how domestic violence is passed off as comedy in the ANSERA saga like in the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode.

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
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Then again, the same crew has an answer to the complain that Beyonce echoed from social media. It was expressed through Donya Ariana at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Tumigil ka! Hindi pa uso yan ngayon! Wala pang ganyang batas! Kaya tumigil ka! Isa kang hampaslupang alipin ko! Kaya’t sasaktan kita kung gusto ko!” (Shut up! That law is still not the trend today! That law doesn’t exist yet! So stop! You are my scumbag slave! So I will hurt you whenever I feel like it!) She then dealt Beyonce with an elbow drop. Allan K found Donya Ariana harsh. “Grabe si Mama ano?” (Mama is too much, isn’t she?) KalyeSerye haters often forget that the parody concept is still very much alive in this segment.

Donya Ariana’s twisted sense of parenthood got even weirder though at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Katulad ni Nidora, tinuturuan ko lamang kayo ng leksyon. Ako na lang ang magpapahirap kay Nidora. Kaysa naman paghihirap dulot ni Anselmo na dala ng kanyang kahirapan.” (Like Nidora, I am just teaching you a lesson. I will just make Nidora suffer myself. Rather than she suffer due to Anselmo’s poverty.) [Loose Translation: I don’t care if may daughter suffers as long as I dish out the lessons.] Beyonce found it disturbing too. “Bad ka, Senyora. That is bad, remember.”

Donya Ariana hates getting her methods questioned too. Especially by her own maid. “Papalabasin ko rin naman siya eh. Pakialamera ka lang kasi. Sige na. Pakainin mo na si Nidora. At kakausapin ko siya mamaya.” (I will be sending her out anyway. You just like to butt in. Go ahead. Feed Nidora. I will talk to her later.) Beyonce saw how Donya Ariana used her crutch as weapon again. “Can you please get my crutch?” Donya Ariana held the crutch pointed at her as the sound of artillery was heard at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Sige. Pakainin mo na.” (Go ahead. Feed her.)

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Apart from the “split-screen” moments. Lola Nidora knew little of what happened to Anselmo. “Ilang araw na akong walang balita kay Anselmo. Kamusta na kaya siya?” (It’s been days since I last heard anything about Anselmo. How is he?) Boss Joey saw on the other monitor how Anselmo winced in pain again. “Sumasakit yung kisme.” (His hair hurt.) At the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. Lola Nidora felt physical pains too. “Nararamdaman ko ang pangungulila. Kasabay ng iba’t ibang sakit na nararamdaman ko.” (I could feel the longing. Alongside various feelings in me.)

Beyonce carried Nidora’s tray of food despite having difficulty in walking with a crutch. “How are you? You’re still pretty like YayaMot.” Nidora felt guilty at the sight of Beyonce’s wounds. “Hindi pa pala nawawala ang mga sugat sa katawan mo. Sorry ha? Pasensiya na.” (Your wounds haven’t healed yet. I’m sorry. My apologies.) Beyonce didn’t want Nidora to worry about it anymore at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “No worries. As I told you, they will be back, remember? I will endure everything for you. All the punch to the right, punch to the left. Hit back and forth. I don’t care. As long as you’re okay. I’m okay.”

ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora could only thank the maid. “Maraming salamat sa yo, Beyonce.” Beyonce felt a little guilty at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode too. “I just want to apologize. Coz nowadays I can’t go to Anselmo. Before your Mama has few guards. Now so many. They are looking after me. I can’t sit. I can’t go. But you know what? I have a strong feeling. You and Anselmo will have perfect life. Okay. Just hold on. Don’t give up. Okay? I love you.” Nidora thanked her again for the little info she provided. “Salamat, Beyonce.” Beyonce prodded Nidora to eat. “You eat now. I bring you a lot. Drink your milk.”

Nidora wasn’t feeling well. Later, she ran to the toilet room. Beyonce got worried for her ward. “Nidora … What happened to you?” Nidora didn’t answer. But the sound of Nidora throwing up is heard. Beyonce had to ask Nidora again. “Is your tummy cold? Have you eat not better last night?” Nidora tried to appease Beyonce while staying in the toilet room. “Okay lang ako, Beyonce. Okay lang ako.” (I am okay.) But at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. Beyonce started fearing the worst. “Nidora? … Cannot be. Cannot be.” Beyonce had to wait for Nidora to come out before asking. “Nidora, are you pregnant?” The truck horn honked off. Ending the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode on a cliffhanger.

Boss Joey thought that it escalated quickly. “Ano kayang nangyari? Biglang naduduwal ah. Nag-boojie lang eh.” (What could have happened? She’s suddenly throwing up. It was just boogie.) Allan K heard Nidora throw up too at the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. “Oo nga. Naduduwal eh.” (Yeah. She puked.) All Boss Joey thought of was the boogie at ANSERA Volume 6. “Yung pagikot-ikot na yan. Baka may nangyari na. Di lang natin alam.” (That spinning. Something might have happened. That we don’t know.)

What kind of “boogie” could it be? It takes 2 to tango. Or in the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode, it take 2 to boogie. And it takes to like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode replay. Subscribing to Eat Bulaga’s official YouTube channel would also help satisfy your curiosity.

Things are heating up after the ALDUB Bagsik ni Mama episode. Did the KalyeSerye go where the story is not supposed to be? Or expected? Alden Richards and Maine Mendoza has yet to even kiss. And there’s a speculation of a character pregnancy. More episode recaps to come just to check if ever we missed anything. To keep yourself abreast of the latest episode recaps, like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter. We’d be expecting you.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: Why So Negative?

Who let Ms. Kara Ortiga get away with an article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH? Everyone including me was expecting a feature article. Not an editorial or an opinion article about how the ALDUB Phenomenon revolved around a girl like Maine Mendoza. Like seriously. I’ve read tabloid articles way better than the article published on Esquire PH’s February 2016 issue. I had to read the article again to check what else did I miss. Also, as of this writing, Ms. Kara Ortiga has set her Twitter account to private.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH
Screengrab from Esquire PH February 2016 Issue

Why all this ruckus when the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH is not the first article that critiqued ALDUB? Sure. It’s just Maine Mendoza and JOWAPAO (amalgam for Jose Manalo, Wally Bayola and Paolo Ballesteros) on the cover. But not even Alden Richards was spared from the spiteful prose that failed Ms. Ortiga failed to suppress in the article. Same bitterness is also evident the moment she wrote about the fans.

About fans of ALDUB and Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: “Fans frantically wave their AlDub tarpaulins, hoping the cameraman decides to pan left.”

Bad choice of words right there. Early in the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH and there’s a slight shade to the fans. Can’t fans simply be enthusiastic because they are happy at the sight of Alden Richards as mentioned in the screengrab? It is unfair to generalize fan clubs as camera-grubbing individuals. And all the more unfair that you attributed that image to the AlDub fan club mentioned.

About Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: “When Maine Mendoza arrives at our shoot, she is three hours late, …”

Why embolden these words? While the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH is not a PR stunt or an advertising feature, putting your subject on a bad light would immediately scoff off some readers. Some may still be unaware of who Maine Mendoza is at this time. What if it’s their first time to read about her and chanced upon your article with the second paragraph looking like this? Why bother mention it when the magazine cover does not show it? It seems as if you want to make her pay for the wasted 3 hours.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH
Screengrab from Esquire PH February 2016 Issue

About Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: “Her smile cannot hide exhaustion, and her face shows the most signs of it – eyes droopy, skin sagging in some places, the result of the wear and tear from early call times, overdone makeup, and late night wrap-ups.”

Ms. Ortiga really went the extra mile in describing Maine Mendoza’s appearance before the stylists managed to come up with her look. Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH revealed a stunning woman happy to be featured on a magazine again. A stark contrast to the woman Ms. Ortiga just described. If she is trying to make her owe her appearance on the magazine to the Esquire PH staff, they should have said so without mentioning specifics. The moment the phrase “overdone makeup” appeared on the article. I am immediately reminded of the days when Maine Mendoza would get bashed for not being pretty enough. That she only got pretty lately because of getting caked up. (I don’t need to name those tabloid writers.)

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH
Screengrab from Esquire PH February 2016 Issue

About Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: “Maine could lip-sync, all right – but that was about all she could do.”

This is the part in the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH starts to really feel more like an opinion piece than a well-researched feature article. Ortiga made the effort to transcribe what little she knew of the audition interview that Ms. Jenny Ferre conducted for Maine Mendoza. Worse, she did not even interview Maine Mendoza herself. But more on that later since we see that Ms. Ortiga can’t even spell Wally Bayola’s name correctly. It’s BAYOLA, not BAYONA. He’s in the photoshoot. She should have at least made the courtesy to ask the man himself if she got his name right.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH
Screengrab from Esquire PH February 2016 Issue

About Alden Richards on Esquire PH: “Alden Richards, a C-list actor who was still awaiting his break.”

C-list by whose parameters? Halfway through the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH and the sarcasm is already reverberating through the halls. Who measures celebrities today as A-list, B-list and C-list? If having 5 soaps – top-billing 3 of them all on primetime – is not enough to remove the snooty view on Alden Richards, what could? Better yet, what television network is Ms. Ortiga actually viewing before she first laid eyes on Alden Richards? If Ms. Ortiga just used the term “C-list” to declare her superiority over anyone that fawns on Aldub, bad move. More like bad choice of words. And we’re only halfway through the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH.

About ALDUB on Esquire PH: “As Anna Mangipol of YES! Magazine points out, think about it: have you ever heard of a love team who could dictate the storyboards of advertisers?”

“Dictate” is different from “adjust”. I may not know the level of adjustments that advertisers made to cater to the logistic demands of a love team like ALDUB. But it’s still not the same as “dictate”. And it’s a sign that this article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH is screaming/begging for attention with the kind of quotes that Ms. Ortiga highlighted. It seems as if she highlighted more of the bad ones because there isn’t anything good worth highlighting anyway. I now have to finish the article just to check anything worth salvaging.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH
Screengrab from Esquire PH February 2016 Issue

About Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: “I catch her wobbling.”

Apparently, the fault-finder in Ms. Ortiga is very much alive in the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH. She went further by writing “A stylist steps in to fix the creases on her clothes, and she holds on to his arms lightly, steadying herself to keep from being caught off-balance”. She obviously doesn’t trust in her subject enough to let her be in this pictorial-slash-photoshoot.

About Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH: “It’s sad that our only encounter is a short e-mail exchange.”

The most disturbing thing in the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH? Ms. Ortiga claims that the only encounter she had with Maine Mendoza is that email. She doesn’t count the photoshoot as the other encounter with the subject. She might be referring to the only time that she got to talk to Maine Mendoza ON EMAIL. Like she had the nerve to write and highlight everything negative about the cover girl and only talk to her by email? Does Ms. Ortiga have any issues with one-on-one interviews? How come it would be the “only” encounter Ms. Ortiga would get with Maine Mendoza? She spent more time documenting her flaws.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH
Screengrab from Esquire PH February 2016 Issue

Okay, she may be more of a skeptic and less of a hater towards ALDUB as expressed in the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH. But reading the whole article contained 10% about Maine Mendoza and even less about JOWAPAO. She was already there watching the cover girl (and men) in action. She had the opportunity to interview them in person. Instead of doing that, she used the space given to her FOR HER OWN RAMBLINGS about how much of a skeptic is she.

While it’s easy to blame the negative writeup about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH on Ms. Ortiga alone, the bigger question is why did Esquire PH let her get away with this? Is it that time of the month where she’s a flaming hemorrhoid and she needed an outlet of her fury? Furthermore, does she even want to write about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH? It really comes across as a vengeful article to me. Like “You make me write about a topic that I don’t like? I will give you an article that you don’t like!” And now, seems like her goal of taking Esquire PH down the drain with her slightly worked.

I don’t know what issue does she have with Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH. But reading the article courtesy of some screengrabs online got me thinking that Ms. Kara Ortiga has some issues. Well, some people have some issues with Maine Mendoza for real. But not all of them get the opportunity to write in a magazine of nationwide reach like Esquire PH. Not all of them get away with writing a list of bad memories. All narrated in the point of the view of the writer and not of the subjects that she is supposed to interview. This is basically why it reads more like a ranting opinion article than a feature article.

Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH

What could have made the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH better?

If I ended up buying a copy of the February 2016 issue of Esquire PH magazine. I’d expect an interview conducted with JOWAPAO and Maine Mendoza. You don’t put them on the cover and write an interview so brief towards the end of the article that it looked more like footnote or an afterthought. All of them. You never disregard the importance of JOWAPAO in the career of Maine Mendoza. (And Alden Richards as well.) You fail to point that out? It will reveal how you, as a writer, view their importance in the ALDUB Phenomenon.

Instead of an interview, you packed your article with unsavory observations from the fans to Alden Richards to Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH. Opinions. If you can’t tell the difference between an opinion article and a feature article, how did you get a job in a magazine? I don’t know if you have done this before to other celebrities featured on your publication. But surely, other celebrities might start having second thoughts about gracing your cover again. What’s the use of being your cover girl if the article ended up sounding spiteful and bitter?

It was an interesting detour from the episode recaps. Perhaps because the article about Maine Mendoza on Esquire PH really got some heads shaking. (And thumbs sore from tweeing Ms. Ortiga for days now.) For the rest of the episode recaps, just follow us on our social media accounts on Facebook and Twitter. We’d be expecting you.

Mr and Mrs Sotto: ANSERA Volume 6

[Today’s episode title, Mr and Mrs Sotto, is in reference to the wedding between one of the founding fathers of Eat Bulaga. Bossing Vic Sotto and co-host Pauleen Luna. One of the few episode titles that does not have the word “ALDUB” in it.] Donya Tinidora was plucking a flower to the rhyme of “He loves me. He loves me too.” Lola Nidora hugged her diary to continue reliving her love story with Anselmo.

Mr And Mrs Sotto

Donya Tinidora had to orient her sister [and the viewers as well] of Bossing Vic’s absence at the KalyeSerye commentary panel. “Andun na ha? Nagre-relax na si Marvic. Tapos yung bride, andun na ha? Nagme-make up na rin.” (He’s already there. Marvic is now relaxing. The bride has also relaxed too. She’s started on her makeup.) Boss Joey had to verify at this point in the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Yung pari ha? Hindi yan yung paring nagkasal sa pamangkin ni Nidora.” (The priest. He’s not the one who wed Nidora’s grand-niece.)

Donya Tinidora assured Boss Joey at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Ay hindi po. Hindi yung nagkasal kay Frankie? Yung dinakip.” (No. The one who wed Frankie? The one who got arrested.) Senator Tito inserted a little inside joke to elicit Donya Tinidora’s reaction. “Naghirap daw si Frankie eh. Natalo sa basketball.” (Frankie allegedly fell into hard times. He lost at the basketball bet.)

Donya Tinidora denied it. “Hindi. Ikaw ang natalo. Kala mo, nakakalimutan na ni Jose yan ha?” (No. You lost. You thought Jose has forgotten about it, huh?) Senator Tito can’t help but laugh it off at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. Donya Tinidora then reminded Lola Nidora to continue her story. “Ate, ituloy na natin ang kwento. Tungkol sa baile.” (Elder sister, let’s continue with the story. About the dance party.)

Mr And Mrs SottoLola Nidora opened her diary at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Eto na ang pagpapatuloy ko. Dear Diary. Eto na siguro ang pinakamasaya kong araw. Ngayon lang kami magiging malaya bilang magkasintahan. Yun lang ang iniisip ko sa oras na yun. Ang baile ang pinakamasayang araw sa buhay ko.” (Here is the continuation. Dear Diary. This might be my happiest day. We only experienced freedom as lovers today. That is all on my mind at that time. The dance party is the happiest day of my life.)

Nidora was outside the venue with Anselmo. “Handa na ako, Anselmo.” (I am now ready, Anselmo.) Anselmo’s happiness at the Mr and Mrs Sotto was boundless. “Nasasabik ka na ngang makilala ng mga kaibigan ko. Lalo na yung kababata kong nagkakaroon ng kaarawan.” (My friends are excited to meet you. Especially my childhood friend who’s having a birthday.) Both of them stood up and prepared themselves. Nidora volunteered to check on Anselmo’s clothes. “Teka. Ayusin ko muna ang damit mo.” (Wait. I need to prep up your clothes.)

Nidora just dusted off some dirt from Anselmo’s shirt and fixed his collar. “Ayan. Kitang kita na ang pagkakisig ng katawan mo, Anselmo.” (There. Your handsome physique is now obvious, Anselmo.) Anselmo was a little worried about his trousers. “Hindi ba masyadong mataas ang bewang?” (Isn’t it a little too high for my waist?) Nidora thought otherwise. “Hindi naman. Uso yan eh.” (Not really. It’s the trend.)

Mr And Mrs SottoAnselmo can’t help but hear things close to where they stood. “May naririnig ka ba?” (Do you hear anything?) He must have been referring to some commentary in the background. [Not loud enough to be heard on TV though.] Nidora didn’t hear them. “Hindi. Ikaw lang ang naririnig ko.” (No. You’re all that I hear.) Anselmo got extra worried at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Parang may nagsasabi kasing itaas ko raw ang pantalon ko.” (As if someone is telling me to raise my pants.) Nidora just thought that Anselmo is hearing things. “Guni guni mo lang yan, Anselmo. Tara na.” (They’re just in your head. Let’s go.) Hand in hand, Anselmo and Nidora entered the venue.

Elsewhere at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. Donya Ariana’s entourage kept the search for Nidora. Whether it included the presidential assistance that Donya Ariana requested in ANSERA Volume 5 is uncertain. Donya Ariana “Pakiramdam ko, andito lang sina Anselmo at Nidora. Naaamoy ko sila …. Ano ba? Sabi ko, mag-deodorant ka!” (I fell that Anselmo and Nidora are just nearby. I can smell them ….. What the heck! I told you to apply deodorant!)

Beyonce was outside the car, walking with a crutch. Donya Ariana asked her henchment at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Si Beyonce ba yang nakikita ko?” (Is that Beyonce that I see?) Her driver Crispin answered. “Opo, Senyora. Kasama po.” (Yes, Madam. She’s with us.) Donya Ariana must have forgotten that she’s part of the entourage since she made her walk on her own. “Pues, very good. Kunin nyo si Beyonce. Bilis!” (Very good. Fetch Beyonce. Quick!)

Mr And Mrs SottoApparently, Beyonce wasn’t part of the entourage. On why she walked alongside Donya Ariana’s car was unclear. Nevertheless, Beyonce was appalled at seeing Donya Ariana. “Senyora? Why you here? I thought you’re in Zambales.” Donya Ariana’s mind games started functioning at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Akala mo lang yun. Nagbago nang isip ko. Sayang lang ang oras. Kailangang matagpuan ko na si Nidora at si Anselmo.” (That’s what you thought. I changed my mind. Time is wasted. I need to find Nidora and Anselmo.)

Donya Ariana revealed how worried is she of Nidora at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Nagaalala ako sa aking anak. Baka walang aircon ang kanyang silid. Sensitive pa naman ang balat nun. Isang kagat ng lamok, kurikong agad.” (I am worried for my child. Her room might not have airconditioning. She has sensitive skin. A minor mosquito bite would induce warts.) Allan K found it a little exaggerated at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Talaga? Wala sa hitsura.” (Really? It wasn’t very obvious.)

Donya Ariana mentioned how high her expectations are. “Ayokong mabuhay nang mahirap ang aking anak. Napakaganda ng aking anak. Ng mga anak ko. Lalo na si Tidora. Si Tinidora …” (I don’t want my child to be poor. My child is so beautiful. My children [are so beautiful]. Especially Tidora.) Boss Joey tried to ask indirectly at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Ano si Tinidora?” (How about Tinidora?) Donya Ariana almost dropped the topic. “Change topic.” Donya Tinidora felt a little hurt. “Okay ha?” Almost. Donya Ariana then mentioned her youngest daughter among the triplets. “Sa father’s side siya nagmana. Hindi ko siya kamukha.” (She got her looks from her father. I don’t look like her.)

Mr And Mrs SottoBeyonce, despite the broken English, still tried to talk some sense to Donya Ariana. “Senyora, but they love each other. Let them love each other.” Donya Ariana does not appreciate advice from a slave. “Let them? Shut up! I do not need your opinion!” Donya Ariana steals Beyonce’s crutch and cocks it. The sound of gunfire is heard. Donya Tinidora found the sound of gunfire from a crutch to be funny. “Pinatay.” (Killed it.) Allan K thought how it escalated quickly at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Saklay yun. May bala?” (That’s a crutch. It has a bullet?)

Beyonce could only complain. There is some improvement on her English though. “You’re so bad, Senyora. Parental guidance is recommended. Violence is bad.” Donya Ariana had enough of Beyonce’s broken English. “Tama na yan, Beyonce. Samahan mo ako. Hindi matatapos ang araw na ito. Makikita ko ang dalawang yun. Ipamigay ang posters.” (Enough, Beyonce. Come with me. Before this day will end. I will see those two. Distribute the posters.) Beyonce tried to get her crutch back. “Senyora. Senyora, my crutch! Senyora, how can I walk?” Donya Ariana left Beyonce to fend for herself. “Kaya mo na yan.” (You can handle yourself now.)

Lola Nidora remembered the blindside that Donya Ariana committed at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Lingid sa kaalaman namin, hindi naman pala umalis sa aming bayan si Mama. Ang araw na ito para sa akin ay Valentine’s Day kahit Enero pa lang.” (Unbeknownst to us, Mama did not go out of town. This is an early Valentine’s Day for me even if it’s just January.)

Mr And Mrs SottoAnselmo braced himself in introducing Nidora to his closest friends. “Nasasabik na akong makilala ka ng aking kaibigan.” (I am thrilled to introduce you to my friends.) Nidora was just as thrilled. “Ako rin. Malapit na ba tayo?” (Me too. Are we getting close now?) Anselmo was by the doorstep. “Konti na lang. Konting tiis na lang.” (Just a little more.) A big band played boogie music live onstage upon their arrival at the venue. People were dancing on the floor having fun. Nidora had some punch drinks on the side. [Dancers consisted of the That’s My Bae finalists and the EB Babes at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode.]

Outside, Donya Ariana kept berating Beyonce for her inefficiency at distributing the posters. They had new posters using a different photo of Nidora. This was a stark contrast to the festivities going on at the dance party. Anselmo was delighted at the dancers that he and Nidora saw upon their arrival. “Napakahusay!” (Magnificent!) Nidora enjoyed what she saw while having some fruit punch to drink at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Ang huhusay naman nila.” (They are amazing.)

Anselmo then approached the celebrant while talking to Nidora at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Ipapakilala kita kay Camilo. Camilo, maligayang kaarawan.” (Let me introduce you to Camilo. Camilo, happy birthday.) Nidora greeted Camilo too. “Maligayang kaarawan, Camilo.” (Happy birthday, Camilo.) Anselmo presented Nidora to Camilo and his friends. “Ang aking irog na si Nidora.” (My beloved, Nidora.) Camilo and the rest of the guests was just as happy to see her.

Mr And Mrs SottoAnselmo could only be amazed at how grand the party is. “Napakaengrande ng iyong kaarawan, kaibigan.” (Your birthday party is so grand, my friend.) Camilo and the rest of his close buddies then asked Anselmo. “Ipakita mo naman kay Nidora yung napakagaling mong sayaw. Ang husay husay mo naman eh.” (Show Nidora your dancing skills. You’re very good at it.) Nidora egged Anselmo just as well at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Sumayaw ka naman.” (Please dance.) Anselmo was hesitant. “Hindi na. Ako’y nahihiya.” (No need. I am shy.)

Nidora believed Anselmo can dance brilliantly. “Kaya mo yan!” (You can do it.) Anselmo’s friends [and the audience present at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode as well] started cheering for him. “Anselmo! Anselmo! Anselmo!” Soon, Anselmo gave in to the request. “O sige.” (Okay.) Anselmo entered the stage on his own. But not before dedicating his dance to Nidora. Anselmo noted at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Nidora, para sa iyo ang sayaw na ito.” (This dance is for you.) Nidora wished him good luck. “Galingan mo, Anselmo.” (Make it good, Anselmo.)

Once Anselmo was done with his number. Nidora ran to hug him. “Napakahusay! Napakahusay mo, Anselmo! Payakap nga. Ang husay mo. Hindi ko alam na sanay ka palang sumayaw ng ganun.” (Magnificent! You’re brilliant, Anselmo! Let me hug you. You were amazing. I didn’t know that you are used to dancing like that.) Soon, it was the girls’ turn at the Mr and Mrs Sotto to urge Nidora to dance. “Nidora, kami naman ang ayain mo sa sayawan. Sanay ka namang sumayaw sa kolehiyo natin.” (Take us dancing too. You were used to dancing in college.) Nidora may be with her college friends. But she’s having apprehensions. “Hindi ako sanay. Nahihiya ako.” (I’m not used to it. I’m shy.)

Mr And Mrs Sotto

Anselmo urged her to dance too. “Ikaw naman ang pinakamaganda sa kanila. Ipakita mo ang iyong galing. Naaalala mo? Tayo’y nag-ensayo.” (You are the most beautiful among them. Show them how good you are. Remember? We practiced.) Nidora acknowledged it. “Ng boogie [/boo-jee/]. Naaalala ko.” (Boogie. I remember.) Anselmo emphasized the practice sessions further at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Boojie Wonderland.”

Anselmo’s words were not enough to boost Nidora’s confidence. “Nahihiya ako, Anselmo.” (I am shy, Anselmo.) Anselmo kept convincing her. “Sige na. Ipakita mo na, Nidora.” (Come on. Show them what you’re got, Nidora.) After some further prodding. Nidora agreed. “Sige na nga. Para sa iyo ito, Anselmo.” (Okay. This is for you, Anselmo.) Boss Joey found Anselmo’s choice of words a little “dated”. “Boojie Wonderland ha?”

Nidora was already on the dance floor when she felt like backing out. Her friends only stopped her. That’s when she just let herself be. Once she started dancing, the rest of the girls followed her at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. This happened while Crispin and his cohorts started pasting posters under the orders of Donya Ariana.

Mr And Mrs Sotto

Nidora apologized after her dance number was done. “Pasensiya. Hindi ako masyadong nakapaghanda.” (My apologies. I was not very prepared.) Anselmo found her claim incredulous. “Seryoso ka ba talagang hindi ka nakapaghanda?” (Are you serious when you said that you failed to prepare in time?) Nidora confirmed it slightly at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Hindi masyado, Anselmo. Pero sana nagustuhan mo.” (Not really, Anselmo. But I hope you liked it.) Anselmo loved it. “Pero napakahusay ng iyong sayaw.” (But your dance was great.) Camilo then signaled the dance party to continue. “Tuloy ang sayawan.” (Keep on dancing.)

Nidora and Anselmo started dancing together the boogie at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. They still call it the “boojie” after Anselmo’s pronunciation mishap. Their feet wasn’t sore enough unlike Donya Ariana. Shown in a different area. Donya Ariana’s feet are sore from walking all over town. Anselmo and Nidora then performed once of the high-risk moves ever performed on the dance floor.

Senator Tito felt his heart stop upon seeing the performance.“Takot ko ah.” (That scared me.) Boss Joey was more than impressed. “Hanep! Buwis-buhay!” (Awesome! And high risk too!) Allan K was shocked in a good way. “In fairness!” Anselmo then acknowledged the talent that Nidora had. “Sabi ko naman sa yo. Tayo’y hindi mapapahiya.” (I told you. We will not be embarrassed.) Nidora didn’t think that she practiced enough. “Hindi tayo nag-ensayo ng lagay na yan.” (We don’t have enough practice at that case.)

Mr And Mrs Sotto

Anselmo confirmed the lack of practice. “Hindi tayo nag-ensayo. Ika’y napakahusay on the spot.” (We did not practice that much. You were amazing on the spot.) Nidora found Anselmo just as great. “Ikaw din. Napaligaya mo ako, Anselmo. Salamat sa pag-imbita sa akin dito.” (You too. You made me exhilaratingly happy. Thanks for inviting me here.) Anselmo felt the same at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Mas lalo ako. Ako’y lubusang naliligayahan. At nawawala ang aking mga nararamdaman kapag kasama kita.” (All the more for me. I am overflowing with joy. I lose my pain whenever I am with you.)

Nidora had to catch her breath at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Teka lang, Anselmo. Huminga muna tayo.” (Wait, Anselmo. Let’s breath for awhile.) Upon regaining her strength. Nidora invited Anselmo to the dance floor again. “Gusto ko pang sumayaw, Anselmo.” (I want to dance more.) Anselmo felt the same too. “Gusto ko pang sumayaw. Ano? Tara na?” (I want to dance more. What now? Let’s go?) Nidora agreed.

Anselmo and Nidora returned to the dance floor. Sweet music played to the tune of “Blue Moon” at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. Allan K recognized the tune and sang along. It was at this point in the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode that Donya Ariana arrives at the party venue. Furious that the lovebirds managed to party in her supposed absence. Anselmo was also feeling bad at this point. A clear sign that he’s out of energy.

Mr And Mrs SottoFor a doyenne perceived as educated, prim and proper. Donya Ariana tends to act like some uneducated housewife who left her manners at home as of the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Tama na yan! Itigil ang kaguluhang ito!” (Enough! Stop this ruckus!) Nidora hid behind Anselmo at Donya Ariana’s arrival. Donya Ariana suddenly remembered her manners the moment she realized the crowd present at the dance party.“Nidora. Anak. Halika na, anak. Sumama ka na kay Mama.” (Child. Come. Come to Mama.)

Donya Ariana’s mind games kept on. “Hija, nagaalala lang naman ako na baka di ka alagaan ni Anselmo.” (Dear, I am just worried that Anselmo will not take care of you.) Nidora kept hiding behind Anselmo. Donya Ariana mentioned the rest of her plans at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Hija, pupunta tayo sa America. Hindi ba, anak, gusto mong pumunta dun?” (We will go to the United States. Isn’t it, child, that you wanted to go there?)

Nidora’s defiance stayed on. “Mama, sa piling lamang po ni Anselmo ako magiging maligaya. Mama, pabayaan nyo na po kami.” (I will only be happy in Anselmo’s place. Please let us be.) Donya Ariana broke the 4th wall again. “Wag mong painitin ang ulo ko! Mainit na sa wig!” (Don’t get me furious! This wig is getting me sweaty!) Allan K laughed hard again at Donya Ariana’s quip at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode.

Mr And Mrs SottoDonya Ariana set aside her manners again. The audience present be damned. “Masama akong magalit, Nidora. Alam mo yan!” (I have a bad temper, Nidora. You know that!) She pushed Beyonce aside to prove her point at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. Nidora asked her mother to stop her cruelty to the poor maid. “Huwag!” (No!) Beyonce could only complain in futility. “It’s very ouch ha?” Anselmo had to beg Donya Ariana’s mercy in case there is still any mercy left in her. “Senyora, nagmamakaawa po ako sa inyo. Patawarin nyo po kami.” (Madam, I beg you. Please forgive us.)

Donya Ariana found it useless to talk to Anselmo at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Ayaw kitang kausap, Anselmo. Isa kang hampaslupang kukurap kurap!” (I don’t want to talk to you, Anselmo! You’re just a scoundrel that keeps on blinking!) Nidora tried to tell Donya Ariana to watch her words. Anselmo though was hurt. “Ang hard nyo naman po.” (You’re too hard on me.) Donya Ariana ended up giving Anselmo a piece of her mind though. “Hindi ikaw ang nababagay sa anak ko. Halika na, Nidora.” (You are not the one who deserved my daughter. Let’s go, Nidora.)

Nidora still refused to obey her mother. “Mama, ayoko.” (No.) Donya Ariana repeated what she announced at the venue. “Pupunta na tayo sa America.” (We will go to America.) Nidora and Anselmo tried to run outside. Beyonce tried to keep Donya Ariana distracted at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Go away! Go away! Go away!” Anselmo and Nidora ran outside the venue only to encounter Crispin and his men.

Mr And Mrs SottoNidora feared the worst. “Anong gagawin nyo? Tigilan nyo! Ano ba?” (What are you going to do with him? Stop! What are you doing?) Donya Ariana laughed like a hyena on steroids hungry for fresh meat at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Akala mo, makakatakas ka, Anselmo.” (You thought you can get away with this, Anselmo.) The men immediately separated Nidora from Anselmo. Then they started beating on the poor man.

Nidora could only scream as another henchman held her away. “Bitawan nyo siya!” (Let go of him!) Donya Ariana urged her henchmen to continue. “Sige! Bugbugin nyo yan!” (Go ahead! Beat him up!) Nidora found Donya Ariana too cruel. But she tried to ask her to stop. “Wag! Tigilan nyo yan! Mama, patigilin mo sila.” (Stop! Mama, make them stop.) Beyonce tried to ask Donya Ariana too. “Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!” Apparently, Donya Ariana has no concept of human rights. She was a worse power-tripper than Lola Nidora herself though. “Ilang beses bang bugbog ang gusto mo?” (How many times do you want to be beaten up?)

Anselmo tried to be polite in his defiance at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Senyora, kahit ilang beses pa po ninyo akong ipabugbog. Hindi po matatawaran ang pagmamahal ko kay Nidora. Ang totoo po niyan, mamamatay na po ako. Kaya’t ang hiling ko sa inyo’y ibigay nyo na ang huling sandali ng aking buhay kasama ang anak nyo. Parang awa nyo na po. Yun lang po ang aking hiling.” (Madam, no matter how many times you get me beaten up. My love for Nidora is boundless. The truth is I am dying. That’s why my request is that you grant the last moments of my life with your daughter. I beg you. That’s all I ask for.)

Mr And Mrs SottoNidora only learned of Anselmo’s terminal illness at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Mama, parang awa nyo na. Pakawalan nyo na po si Anselmo, Mama.” (Please have mercy. Let go of Anselmo, Mama.) Donya Ariana’s more of a sadist than a protective mother at this point. “Hindi nyo ako makukuha sa pakiusap nyo. Crispin, isakay na itong si Nidora sa auto. Bilis!” (You can’t move me with your request. Crispin, take Nidora to the car. Quick!) Nidora tried to get away. “Bitiwan nyo ako!” (Let go of me!) Nidora got away from the henchmen and embraced Anselmo. The men failed to stop the hug from happening.

Anselmo begged Nidora. “Nidora, wag mo kong iiwan.” (Don’t leave me.) The men tried to separate them again. They continued with their cruelty to Anselmo as Nidora screamed. Donya Ariana blocked the path so in case Nidora escapes from the henchmen again, they don’t get to embrace again. Nidora confronted her mother despite Crispin’s tight grip. “Mama, tapusin na natin ito! San nyo ba ko dadalhin?” (Let’s get this over and done with! Where are you taking me?)

The men continued beating up Anselmo. They weren’t efficient enough. Anselmo’s having migraine attacks again. Yet he escaped the thugs in time to see Nidora in the car. Also, the car didn’t run fast enough to stop the lovers from seeing each other. [Also, at this point in the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode, the audio started going choppy.] Anselmo’s suspenders have fallen off. Once he ran out of energy, the car ran out of gas too. Donya Ariana ended up pushing the car herself. Crispin et al were really inefficient at the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode.

Mr And Mrs SottoDonya Tinidora realized how hard it must have been for Lola Nidora as of the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode. “Ate, ang sakit pala ng dinanas mo.” (What you went through was hard.) Lola Nidora’s story was a tough one. “Oo. Yan ang nagpatigas ng puso ko.” (Yes, it hardened my heart.) Donya Tinidora closed the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode once the truck horn honked off. “Napakasakit po ng nangyari kay ate. Naiiyak po ako. Napakalupit naman po ng Mama. Nagawa niya po ang lahat ng yun na pigilin ang kaligayahan.” (What happened to elder sister was painful. I felt like crying. Mama was so harsh.)

What lies ahead with the now Mr and Mrs Sotto? The rest of the wedding highlights are on the official Facebook page of Eat Bulaga. Subscribe to their official YouTube channel as well to see the rest of the KalyeSerye replays while you’re at it.

How hard must Donya Ariana be in her quest of disciplining her daughter? Raging hormones aside. Donya Ariana overreacted. Then again, it’s 1945. Who knows what kind of parenting is the norm at that time? For more episode recaps like the Mr and Mrs Sotto episode, follow us on our social media accounts. Like our official Facebook page, The Philippines Web. And follow us on Twitter @pinasamazing. We’d be expecting you.

ALDUB Turn Back Time: ANSERA Volume 5

Donya Tinidora and Lola Nidora were enjoying the open field at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. Donya Tinidora even spotted someone trying to do the number 2 from some corner. “Hoy! Bawal diyan!” (That’s not allowed!) They were frolicking by the meadow as Lola Nidora clutched her diary tightly. They were singing some lines from Sylvia La Torre’s “Sa Kabukiran” (In The Field). Shortly, they walked towards the bamboo bed under the tree.

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Allan K realized how Donya Tinidora’s songs slowly evolved into a passion play song every Holy Week. “Nauwi naman sa pasyon.” (It ended up sounding like a passion play.) Donya Tinidora was excited for the wedding. “Isang araw na lang, kasal na nina Marvic at Poleng.” (One day to go before the wedding.) Boss Joey candidly mentioned them at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Ano ba? Nagha-honeymoon na.” (What do you know? They’re already having a honeymoon.)

Senator Tito had to mention Lola Nidora’s item. “Ako din, excited na pero para diyan sa hawak ni Lola Nidora.” (I’m excited too but on the item that Granny Nidora held.) Donya Tinidora had to remind her sister to avoid crying at the wedding. It was then revealed at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode how Lola Nidora cried at her own wedding.

Lola Nidora confirmed tearing up at her wedding with Don Miguel de Explorer. “Yung kasal namin ni Miguel, umiyak ako nang umiyak. Mahal ko si Miguel. Pero di ko maalis sa isip ko si Anselmo. Itutuloy ko ang kwento.” (In my wedding with Miguel, I kept crying. I love Miguel. But I can’t get Anselmo off my mind. I will continue the story.) Donya Tinidora remembered their mother again at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Ang lupit pala ni Mama. Pero marunong din magmahal yan. Matigas lang ang ulo natin.” (Mama was harsh. But she knows how to love. We just happened to be hard-headed.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora, again, justified her strictness towards Alden and Divina then. “Ayokong mangyari yun kay Divina. Pati na kay Dora at kay Duhrizz.” (I don’t want that to happen to Divina. And to Dora and Duhrizz as well.) Donya Tinidora expected Lola Nidora to cry anytime. “Naalala mo na naman si Anselmo.” (You remembered Anselmo again.) Lola Nidora neither said yes or no at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Naalala ko mga apo ko. Mga anak ko.” (I remembered by grandchildren. [And] My children.)

Donya Tinidora hasn’t seen Lola Nidora’s grandchildren apart from Dora and Duhrizz as of the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Oo nga. Nasan na ba mga apo mo? Mga pamangkin ko?” (Yes indeed. Where are your grandchildren? [And] Your granchildren?) Boss Joey wasn’t carried away that much at the moment recalled. “Nakakaiyak na sana eh. Kaya lang panay ang bukaka mo, Tinidora.” (I would have teared up. But you keep your legs apart, Tinidora.) Donya Tinidora reasoned out that it’s a minor physical defect brought by being carried on the side.

Lola Nidora then started to open her diary. “Eto, makinig kayo.” (Here. Listen.) Donya Tinidora had to wait for everyone else to settle before letting Lola Nidora continue at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Teka. Yung isa, hindi nakikinig. Hoy! Makinig kayo!” (Wait. One is not yet listening. You! Listen up!) Lola Nidora seconded Donya Tinidora’s call. “Wag magkwentuhan muna.” (Don’t chat for now.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora implied that the time that she was with Anselmo didn’t take as many days as expected. But she emphasized in the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode the days where they were the happiest.“Yan ang isang araw na alam kong masarap umibig.” (That was one day that falling in love feels great.) Anselmo and Nidora were frolicking by the meadow too. But in slo-mo. Allan K saw Anselmo’s place at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode.“Sa kabukiran.” (In the field.) Boss Joey even saw some animals. “Ano ba yun? Baboy o baka?’ (What’s that? A pig or a cow.) Allan K confirmed what Boss Joey saw. “Baka.” (A cow.)

Anselmo slowed down. “Nidora, meron akong sorpresa sa ‘yo.” (I have a surprise for you.) Nidora asked what is it. Allan K noted how even the way they talked in slo-mo too.“Slo-mo magsalita.” (Slo-mo talking [without the lowered pitch].) Anselmo then unraveled a straw mat. Nidora sat on it as Anselmo put down some baskets. Nidora asked Anselmo what he brought.“Ano bang inihanda mo?” (What did you prepare?) Anselmo gave Nidora a little hint at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Paborito mo.” (Your favorite.)

Anselmo pulled out one of the dishes in one of the baskets. It’s grilled chicken intestines. Nidora was happy. But she remembered her mother again at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Papagalitan ako ni Mama pag nalaman niyang kumakain ako niyan.” (Mama will get angry if she learned that I eat those.) Anselmo politely asked to change the topic. “Puede bang masaya muna tayo habang wala siya?” (Can we be happy for the meantime while she’s not around?)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora obliged. “Alam mo, Anselmo? Higit sa langit ang ligaya ko ngayong kapiling ka.” (You know, Anselmo? My happiness is greater than heaven itself by your side.) Anselmo agreed at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Nawawala ang sama ng aking pakiramdam kapag kasama kita. Naalala mo ito?” (My pain subsides whenever I am with you. Do you remember this?) He then showed Nidora his radio and played some tunes again. Senator Tito recognized the singer heard on the radio. “Perry Como.” Boss Joey then tried to connect that name to Anselmo. “Perry Kurap.”

Anselmo’s next DUBsmash track prompted the KalyeSerye commentary panel to sing along. They took the second voice lines, of course, at the ALDUB Turn Back Time. “O ilaw sa gabing madilim. Wangis mo’y bituin sa langit.” (O light in the dark night. Your face is a star in the night.) Nidora replied by DUBsmashing Sylvia La Torre’s song.“Sa Kabukiran.” The ALDUB Turn Back Time episode might be the only episode so far with a soprano hit to be DUBsmashed so far.

Donya Ariana searched high and low to the point of hopping into a boat at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Hoy! Pedring! Tigilan mo na ang pagsagwan! Naka-park na tayo. Beyonce! Parusa mo yan! Lalangoy ka! Parang pilay lang yan eh.” (Stop rowing! We’re already parked on the shore! Beyonce! That’s your punishment! You have to swim! It’s just a twisted arm [that you’re harboring].)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Beyonce was shown at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode trying to stand beside the boat. “I swam.” Donya Ariana’s maltreatment to Beyonce went on. “Hahanapin natin. Nasan si Nidora?” (We have to search. Where is Nidora?) She even demanded Beyonce to assist her off the boat. Beyonce was the one with a crutch and a neck brace as she assisted Donya Ariana.

Donya Ariana approached one of the locals to ask for Nidora. That was until she noticed that the woman had a mole too. She scolded Beyonce again. “Niloloko mo ako. Ikaw naghahanap ng extra dito. Bakit may nunal ito?” (You’re duping me. You’re in charge of getting extras around here. How come she has a mole too?) Donya Ariana tried not to be distracted with the woman’s mole. “May nakita ba kayong babaeng ganito itsura?” (Have you seen a woman that looked like this?) Donya Ariana then pulled Beyonce to show the poster. The woman on the shore said no.

Nidora’s photo was printed on a “Wanted” poster. Except that the word printed above the photo is “Nawawala” (Missing). Donya Ariana found it hard to walk on the shore with her long dress. She yelled at Beyonce again. “Alalayan mo ako.” (Assist me.) Only in KalyeSerye episodes like the ALDUB Turn Back Time where a woman named Ariana is bullying/maltreating a woman named Beyonce.

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana then saw a boatman. She asked him about Nidora by using the poster. The KalyeSerye commentators expected the worse for Beyonce a.k.a. YayaMot. “Ayan. Malapit na sa dagat.” (Now they’re closer to the sea.) Beyonce then showed the boatman the poster. “Like this?” Beyonce practically shoved the poster to the boatman’s face. The boatman just shook his head. So the search went on at the ALDUB Turn Back Time.

Donya Ariana scolded Beyonce again for the lackluster poster. “Sabi ko, i-colored mo yan para makilala si Nidora. May nakita po ba kayong babaeng ganito ang itsura? Gamitan mo ng laway yan para dumikit yung poster. Kundi ka sana kumampi kay Nidora, masaya tayo ngayon.” (I told you to print the poster in color. [Sees other people at the ALDUB Turn Back Time and starts asking.] Have you seen a woman that looked like this? [Shifts her attention back to Beyonce.] If you didn’t take Nidora’s side, we could have been happy now.)

Beyonce kept on defending herself. She tried to speak a little Tagalog just so Donya Ariana can understand her better. Her English grammar is that bad at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “I don’t have a sin. Wala akong kasalanan. I just told Nidora to follow her dreams. Remember, Senyora. She’s not a kid anymore!” Donya Ariana refused to accept Beyonce’s reasoning. “Shut up! Habang buhay ka nang maglilingkod sa akin. Kinasusuklaman kita! Kayong lahat ng mga EB Babes!” (You will serve me forever. I abhor you! You and all of the EB Babes!)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Beyonce tried breaking the 4th wall too at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. She tried to defend the EB Babes. “Don’t include them. They don’t know anything.” Donya Ariana started including Anselmo into her fury instead.“Gaya ng pagkasuklam ko kay Anselmo.” (Just like how much I hate Anselmo!)

Donya Ariana then voiced out her worries at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Baka hindi pa kumakain si Nidora. Baka kahit kanin wala si Anselmo. Bago matulog sa gabi. Uminom kaya ng gatas si Nidora? Baka maraming lamok. Sensitive pa naman si Nidora.” (Nidora might not have eaten yet. Anselmo might not even have rice. Before sleeping at night. Has Nidora drank her milk? There might be mosquitoes where she is. Nidora is so sensitive.) Donya Ariana found Anselmo too poor to provide a livable home for Nidora. It made her weep.

Allan K noticed the way Donya Ariana smudged off her tears at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Pumapasok yung daliri sa salamin.” (Her fingers went through the frames.) Donya Ariana continued. “Baka madapuan siya ng lamok. Mahal na mahal ko ang anak ko. Ayoko sa hampaslupang pinili niya. Ayokong magkaapo ng amoy lupa katulad ni Anselmo.” (Mosquitoes might touch her. I love my daughter very much. I hate the man she chose. I don’t want grandchildren with a scoundrel like Anselmo.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana called on Beyonce again. “Beyonce! Tumawag na ba si Sergio?” (Has Sergio called?) Beyonce was clueless at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Sino pong Sergio?” (Who’s Sergio?) Donya Ariana was appalled at her maid’s idiocy. “Sino pa? Ang pangulong Sergio Osmena! Anong akala mo? Sergio at Marimar? Ipapahanap ko siya sa buong sandatahang Pilipinas!” (Who else? The president of the Philippines, Sergio Osmena! You think it’s Sergio of the Sergio-MariMar love team? I would have him [Anselmo] searched by the Philippine military.) Whether Donya Ariana is influential enough to get the presidential influence useful in her search is something the viewers have to see after watching the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode.

Lola Nidora feared Donya Ariana’s influence too. Whether she earned it from marrying a Zobeyala or she is already influential on her own, she did not elaborate. “Hindi ko na maisip ang mga kayang gawin ni Mama kay Anselmo. Awang-awa ako sa kanya.” (I can’t think of the things that Mama is capable of doing to Anselmo.) Donya Tinidora found Lola Nidora’s elopement with Anselmo as a shock. “Mas mapusok ka pala kay Divina kasi matigas ang ulo mo.” (So you’re more aggressive than Divina because you’re hard-headed.)

Lola Nidora shared even her epiphany at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Hindi ko mapigil na tumingin sa maamong mukha ni Anselmo habang naidlip. Napakakisig ni Anselmo. Higit sa lahat, sa bawat haplos ko ng mukha niya, iniisip ko. Anong magiging kinabukasan namin?” (I can’t help but stare at Anselmo’s kind face as he slept. Anselmo is so handsome. Most of all, with every touch, I thought. What would our future be?)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo woke up as Nidora had this train of thought. “Pasensiya ka na, Nidora. Nakaidlip ako. Nagulo ba ang aking buhok?” (My apologies, Nidora. I fell asleep. Did my hair get disheveled?) Nidora replied. “Hindi naman. Okay pa rin siya.” (No. It still looked okay.) Shortly, Anselmo was wincing in pain at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Aray!” Nidora had no idea about Anselmo’s TSU. “Anong nangyayari sa ‘yo, Anselmo?” (What happened, Anselmo?)

Anselmo could only reply after the pain has subsided. “Wag kang magalala. Biglaan ang sakit ng ulo ko nitong mga huling araw.” (Don’t worry. My head suddenly gets painful these past few days.) Lola Nidora saw the signs. But could not give a name to it. “Hindi ko alam. May malubha pala siyang karamdaman. Naninikip ang dibdib ko.” (I didn’t know. He has a concurring ailment. My chest tightened [just thinking about it].) Donya Tinidora had a practical remedy at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Magpalit ka na ng bra.” (Change your bra.) It almost ruined the somber mood at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode.

Lola Nidora admitted that as early in the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. She already has a birthday request. “Sa susunod na birthday ko, mahanap ko ang transistor na gamit ni Anselmo. Hinahanap ko sa mga auction house yun. Binibilad pa namin ang baterya nun.” (On my next birthday, I hope to find Anselmo’s transistor [radio]. I’ve been searching it in auction houses. The battery is recharged by putting it under the sun.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora got a little distracted though. “Ate, ang dami namang hantik dito. May galit talaga sa atin yung floor director.” (There are so many fire ants here. The floor director must have really hated us.) Lola Nidora may be occasionally distracted herself with Donya Tinidora’s antics at the ALDUB Turn Back Time. But she continued in her nostalgia. “Naramdaman ko na may inililihim si Anselmo.” (I sensed that Anselmo is keeping a secret from me.)

Nidora offered to massage Anselmo’s head. “Halika. Hihilutin ko ang ulo mo.” (Come. I’d soothe your head.) Anselmo laid his head on Nidora’s lap. He felt good at the thought of Nidora’s hand on his scalp. “Parang nawala na ang sakit ng aking ulo. Pero nagulo ang aking buhok. Maaari mo ba akong tulungang maglagay ng pamoda?” (It’s as if my headache is gone. But my hair got a little disarrayed. May you please help me apply “pamoda”?) Anselmo seemed to have pronunciation issues at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode.

Someone from the KalyeSerye commentary panel tried to correct Anselmo. “Pomada!” [“Pomada” is the old Tagalog for hair gel.] Anselmo thought of his hair at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Mahalaga kasi sa akin ang kisme ko eh.” Nidora asked why. Anselmo may be vain. “Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit eh.” (I don’t know myself.) Nidora found Anselmo to be a control freak regarding his hair. “Diyan ka ba kumukuha ng lakas?” (Is it where you draw your power from?)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora hasn’t found the hair gel yet when she saw Anselmo hold his head again. “Sumasakit na naman ang ulo mo.” (You’re having another headache.) Anselmo tried to downplay the pain. “Napagod lang ako.” (I’m just tired.) Nidora tried to help Anselmo drink the water from his own canister. Allan K wondered where Anselmo got his water brought at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Hindi ba tubig ng mga doctor yan?” (Isn’t that the doctor’s water?)

Anselmo regained his strength. He was strong enough to stare Nidora straight to her eyes at the ALDUB Turn Back Time. “Wag kang mag-alala. Malakas ako, irog. Kahit anong mangyari, asahan mong andito ako palagi. Walang mangyayaring masama sa akin.” (Don’t worry. I am strong, my love. Whatever happens, expect me to be here always. Nothing unfortunate will happen to me.) Nidora counted on Anselmo’s promise. “Asahan ko.” (I will count on you on that.)

Nidora then taught Anselmo a hand gesture of promise at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Pinky swear ang tawag dito, Anselmo.” (This is called the pinky swear.) The KalyeSerye commentary panel realized that this is the same pinky swear that Lola Nidora taught to Divina. “Dun pala nag-umpisa.” (So that’s where it started.) Nidora found it easy to teach Anselmo the pinky swear. “Para magkaroon ng seal ang ating pangako. Di kita pababayaan.” (So that seals our promise. I will never neglect you.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

As Nidora was pledging herself to Anselmo. Donya Ariana had all of her workers in the farm called. “Ipinatawag ko kayong lahat. Pag nalaman kong nagtatago si Anselmo sa hacienda ko, palalayasin ko kayong lahat. Sabay sabay kayong mamamatay sa gutom. At kung sinuman ang makikipagkutsaba kina Nidora at Anselmo at nalaman ko, matutulad kayo sa kanya.” (I had all of you called. Once I learn that Anselmo is hiding in my hacienda [farm], I would have you all banished. All of you will die of starvation. And whoever connives with Nidora and Anselmo will end up like her.) She raised Beyonce’s hand as an example at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode to be feared.

Beyonce tried to ask help from the crowd present at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Mother! Father! Brother! Sister!” Donya Ariana had a hunch that the young couple hasn’t gone that far. “Alam kong nandito lang sa paligid ligid si Anselmo. Pag di nyo siya nakita, makikita nyo ang hinahanap nyo.” (I know that Anselmo is just around the corner. If you didn’t see him, you will see what you are looking for from me.)

Lola Nidora was oblivious to the search operations that Donya Ariana has set at this time. “Pag hindi masakit ang ulo ni Anselmo, masaya kami sa piling ng isa’t isa.” (Whenever Anselmo is not having a headache, we are happy in each other’s company.) Anselmo then asked Nidora a favor at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Nidora? Maaari ba akong humiling? Lagi kong bitbit ang aking radyo. Maaari ba tayong sumayaw?” (May I have this request? I always carry my radio. May I dance with you?) Nidora was hesitant. “Hindi ako sanay. Pero susubukan ko para sa ‘yo.” (I am not used to it. But I will try it for you.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo then tried to orient Nidora.“Alam mo ba ang sayaw ng boogie?” (Do you know the dance called boogie?) One problem though was he pronounced it as /boo-jee/. Nidora had to ask. “Buji? Ano yun?” (What’s that?) That’s strike 2 for Anselmo after pronouncing “pamoda” wrong at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. [She even tried to tell him that it’s /boo-gee/, not /boo-jee/. Then again, it helped in character consistency knowing that Anselmo’s status in life as too poor to get proper education.]

Nidora let Anselmo take the lead. He may not know how to pronounce “boogie” correctly. But he surely had the moves at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. Nidora was more than impressed. “Ikaw naman, Anselmo. Ginulat mo naman ako sa talento mo.” (You surprised me with your talent.) Anselmo was happy to teach Nidora. “Yan ang tinatawag na boogie.” (That’s what you call a boogie dance.)

ALDUB Turn Back Time
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo rested to ask Nidora for another favor. “Kasi may sayawan yung aking kababata. Kaarawan niya. Gusto kong dumalaw.” (There is a dance party by my childhood friend. It’s his birthday. I’d like to go.) Nidora had apprehensions again at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Irog ko, baka matunton tayo ng mama.” (My love, Mama might find us.)

Anselmo got a little overconfident at the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode. “Di tayo matatagpuan. Kasama nating sasayaw ang mga baka at mga baboy.” (She will not find us. We will dance with the cows and the pigs. [A reference to the painted animals in the background.]) Nidora thought of it as a good thing. “Masaya yun. Magbo-boogie rin ba sila?” (That sounds fun. Would they be dancing the boogie too?) Anselmo said yes.

Back to Donya Ariana throwing instructions at their workers. “Ano pang hinihintay ninyo? 2016? Hala! Hanapin nyo si Nidora at ang hampas lupang si Anselmo! Ikaw! Hanapin mo!” (What are you waiting for? 2016? Find Nidora and the scoundrel Anselmo! You! Find them!) As Beyonce joined the searching party. Anselmo had another migraine attack. Nidora could only comfort him not knowing the level of pain he’s going through. The truck horn soon honked off. Ending the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode into cliffhanger mode.

With Anselmo having TSU, can he bring Nidora to the dance party? Will Beyonce make it to ANSERA Volume 6 alive? Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB Turn Back Time episode replay. It’s also on Eat Bulaga’s official YouTube channel for your perusal.

With MaiDen (Maine Mendoza and Alden Richards) now taking on roles other than Divina and Alden, would this mean more flashback editions for the phenomenal KalyeSerye? Tidora’s relationship history was never addressed. And Tinidora mentioned having an ex other than Bill. While waiting for either sister to mention an ex for nostalgia purposes, like and share this ALDUB Turn Back Time episode recap. Don’t forget to like us on Facebook. And follow us on Twitter. We’d be expecting you.

ALDUB 28th Weeksary: ANSERA Volume 4

Early in the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode, the diary was shown on the floor. Donya Tinidora did not see it soon enough. Not until her feet accidentally gave the diary a slight kick. She was calling out to her sister. But no one responded. She tried looking for Lola Nidora again. “Ate? Kanina lang nandito, iniwan ko.” (Awhile ago, she was just here.) Boss Joey gave Donya Tinidora a little idea what to do. “Papakialaman ni Ging Ging.” (Ging Ging will peek [into the diary].) Ging Ging was Jose Manalo’s ANSERA alter-ego.

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora denied Boss Joey’s suggestion. “Huy! Hindi ako ganun. Hindi naman niya basta-basta iiwan ito. Mahirap yung nakikialam ka sa bagay ng may bagay.” (That’s not how I am. I don’t think she would simply leave it around here. It’s hard when you’re tampering on certain things.) Soon enough though, curiosity got the better of Donya Tinidora at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. She picked up the diary and opened a few pages. She did not read aloud. But she was covering her mouth as if seeing something shocking. Lola Nidora returned to their home seeing Donya Tinidora reading the diary.

Lola Nidora was livid. “Tinidora! Bakit mo binabasa ito? Akin ‘to eh! Akin ‘to! Hindi mo dapat ito binabasa!” (Why are you reading this? This is mine! Mine! You are not supposed to be reading this.) Donya Tinidora was apologetic at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Sori, ate. Iniwan mo.” (I’m sorry. You left it there.) Lola Nidora lectured Donya Tinidora. “Hindi sa ‘yo. Pag di sa ‘yo, wag mong papakialaman!” (If it isn’t yours, don’t even bother.)

Donya Tinidora didn’t appreciate getting blamed for the minor peep. “Burara ka tapos ako sisisihin mo. Bakit mo ba naiwan yan?” (You’re scatterbrained and then you blame me. Why did you leave it lying around there?) Lola Nidora admitted the minor quibbles. “Ulyanin na ‘ko.” (I’m going senile.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Boss Joey was more curious about which part did Donya Tinidora read at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary. “Di puede iere? Meron bang sandata?” (Can’t you air it? Does it refer to “weapons”?) Bossing Vic mentioned another line familiar for fans of Xerex Xaviera. “Mga balaraw ng pag-ibig?” (Daggers of love?) [Tagalog erotica tend to use euphemisms in describing sexual activities. Hence these terms mentioned at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.]

Lola Nidora just repeated what she told Donya Tinidora. “Next time, wag mong bubuksan.” (Don’t open it next time.) The sisters changed their topic to Bossing Vic’s wedding preparations. Donya Tinidora then revealed her wedding gift. A potty. “Regalo ko kina Pauleen at Marvic. Ang linis niyan. Hinugasan ko yan.” (This is my gift to Pauleen and Marvic. It’s clean. I washed it myself.) Bossing Vic voiced out his concerns at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Baka gamit na yan ha?” (That might be used.) Donya Tinidora didn’t directly deny it. “Hindi. Slightly used lang.”

Bossing Vic then asked for Lola Nidora’s gift as of the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Ano regalo nyo?” (What’s your gift?) Donya Tinidora spoke ahead of Lola Nidora. She tried to lift the item too. “Kalderong sira.” (A broken rice pot.) When Donya Tinidora tried to lift it, the handle got detached on one side. Lola Nidora blamed the defect on her sister. “Sinira mo eh.” (You broke it.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora then saw that the rice pot has contents. “Kalderong may bigas.” (A rice pot with rice grains.) Bossing Vic liked Lola Nidora’s gift. “Salamat naman at binahaginan ninyo kami.” (Thank you for sharing.) Lola Nidora still found some rice grains from one of the Sugod Bahay errands they had in the past before the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.

Lola Nidora went back to chastising Donya Tinidora. Donya Tinidora still denies reading more than she should have at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Hindi ko naman nabasa. Tiningnan ko lang yung iba. Yung kwentong pag-ibig. Haba ng hair mo, ate, nung kabataan mo pala. Sana di ka na tumanda.” (I didn’t read it. I just checked some pages. The love stories. You were so beautiful, elder sister, when you were young. You shouldn’t have gotten old.) Lola Nidora thought that she aged well though. “Hanggang ngayon naman, may asim pa ako. Eto. Makinig kayong mabuti.” (Until now, I still got some appeal in me. Here. Listen well.) She then reopened her diary where she left off at ANSERA Volume 3.

Lola Nidora recalled the day Donya Ariana put her away. “Tinapon muna ako. Nabubuhay na lamang ako sa mga liham ni Anselmo. Si YayaMot ang naging tulay para mahanap ni Anselmo. Kahit alam kong ikamamatay ko, hinanap ko si Anselmo. Ang gusto ko lang ay makapiling si Anselmo. Hinanap ko si Anselmo.” (I was exiled from home. I only live through the letters of Anselmo. YayaMot [a.k.a. Nanny Beyonce] became the bridge for me to find Anselmo. Even if I risked dying, I searched for Anselmo. I just want to be with him. I looked for him.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora was shown by Aurora Blvd looking for Anselmo. Bossing Vic thought that she might sing. “Baka mag-traffic diva pa yan.” (She might do the Traffic Diva [segment in Eat Bulaga].) Nidora asked around. Donya Tinidora noticed some production discrepancies at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode too. “Sila lang ang luma ang damit ano? Yung tao, modern ang damit eh.” (Only they [Anselmo and Nidora] wore period clothes.) She was referring to the people that Nidora asked that didn’t wear period clothes like her.

Lola Nidora recalled at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode how she searched high and low. “Palinga-linga.” (I was looking around.) Bossing Vic can’t help but sing one of the common songs performed at the Eat Bulaga segment Traffic Diva. “Ayoko sana …” Allan K had to remind him that they are watching the KalyeSerye segment. “Hindi ito traffic diva, Bossing.” Bossing Vic then stopped after just one line at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.

Lola Nidora read from her diary. “Kahit sobrang init, di ramdam. Makita ko lang si Anselmo. Alam kong nasa hospital siya. Nalaman ko rin kung saan ang hospital at dali dali akong pumunta sa kanya.” (No matter howo hot the weather got, I didn’t feel it. Just for me to see Anselmo. I know he’s at the hospital. I learned of the hospital and immediately went to him.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora hopped into a passenger jeepney in her search. Allan K’s concern was some random fan taking advantage of the scene for a selfie opportunity at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Pag may nag-selfie, pababain ha?” (If someone takes a selfie, have her taken down the jeep.) He himself found that possibility funny himself.

Lola Nidora continued. “Tandang tanda ko pa ang panahon na yun. Takot na takot ako sa Mama. Pero matigas ang ulo ko. Sinunod ko pa rin ang puso ko.” (I could still remember the days. I was so scared of mama. But I was hard-headed. I still followed my heart.) Donya Tinidora comforted Lola Nidora. “Naiintindihan kita, ate.” (I understand, elder sister.) Lola Nidora relayed how she didn’t find Anselmo at the hospital. “Nagpilit si Anselmo na umalis ng hospital. Naghahanapan pala kaming dalawa.” (Anselmo forced himself out of the hospital. We ended up searching for each other.)

The lady doctor was shocked to see Anselmo packing his things. “Anselmo, anong iyong ginagawa?” (What are you doing?) It’s not yet time for him to go. But Anselmo insisted on leaving. “Kelangan ko pong puntahan ang aking irog na si Nidora. Kelangan ko pong maghanap.” (I need to go to my beloved Nidora. I need to search.) It was shown at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode how Anselmo collapsed.

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

The doctor caught him in time. “Sinabi ko na sa yo, hindi mo pa kaya. Anselmo. Delikado sa buhay mo! Anselmo!” (I told you that you can’t do it yet. Your life is in danger!) The doctor failed to stop Anselmo. There weren’t any nurses or paramedics to help her stop Anselmo. Anselmo’s need to find Nidora was stronger than the doctor’s orders. Bossing Vic just observed the doctor at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Tingnan mo si Dra. Lydia oh.” (Look at Dra. Lydia.) Boss Joey guessed the doctor’s full name. “Dra. Lydia Ping Ping ang pangalan niyan.” (Her name is Dra. Lydia Ping Ping.)

Donya Tinidora saw how the doctor’s appearance has changed. “Nagpagupit na yung doctor.” (The doctor had a haircut.) Allan K disagreed. “Kinulot lang.” (They just curled it.) Bossing Vic suddenly got worried for Anselmo escaping at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Ilang pasyente na ang nahulog diyan? Ang taas ng hagdan eh.” (How many patients have fallen off? The stairs are too steep.) Allan K had to reiterate Anselmo’s condition. “Me sakit yan. TSU. Tumor sa utak.” (He has a brain tumor.)

Lola Nidora knew how Anselmo braved the streets in his condition. “Hirap na hirap si Anselmo sa kakakurap.” (He had a lot of difficulty blinking.) It got Allan K thinking. “Nakaka-tumor pala ang kurap nang kurap.” (So too much blinking causes tumors.) Boss Joey disagreed. “Baka malakas lang ang araw.” (The sun might just be shining a little too bright.) Donya Tinidora has gotten used to Anselmo’s mannerism at this point in the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Talagang hindi niya maiwasan ang pagkurap.” (He really can’t help but blink.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

On the other hand, Bossing Vic noticed the young Nidora’s journey at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Ang layo ng nilakbay nito. Kanina nakasarao, ngayon naka-tricycle.” (She took a long trip. Awhile ago, she’s on the jeep. Now she’s on a tricycle.) Lola Nidora remembered the difficulty of the search. “Pilit kaming pinagtatagpo ng aming mga puso. Pero nagkakasalisi kami.” (Our hearts try to make us meet. But we keep missing each other.) It led to a slightly jazzy DUBsmash exchange.

It didn’t take long before they see each other at some street corner. Once they are sure that their eyes are not deceiving them. Nidora and Anselmo ran to each other. It was almost like how they embraced each other in ANSERA Volume 2. Except that Anselmo is still not strong enough to lift Nidora at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. Bossing Vic thought they they’d even kiss. “Wala bang tukaan yan?” (No smooch?) Donya Tinidora tried to egg them on. “Tukaan na.” (Smooch now.) Unlike Alden and Divina. Anselmo and Nidora were at least “official”.

Anselmo quickly asked Nidora. “Paano mo akong nahanap?” (How did you find me?) Nidora admitted throwing caution to the wind. “Nagbabakasakali ako, Anselmo. Napakasaya ko. Payakap nga.” (I took a chance, Anselmo. I am overjoyed. Please hug me.) Anselmo was just as overjoyed. “Abot langit ang binibigay mo sa ‘king ligaya.” (The kind of joy that you bring me is heavenly.) Nidora got close enough to Anselmo to sense something wrong at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Okay ka lang ba? Bakit parang namumutla ka, Anselmo?” (Are you alright? Why do you look pale?) Anselmo downplayed his health condition. “Baka puyat lang ako.” (Maybe I just lack sleep.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora pressed for further info. “Wala ka bang dinaramdam, Anselmo?” (Are you not feeling anything?) Allan K saw Anselmo touch Nidora’s hair. “Inayos yung wig.” (He rearranged her wig.) Anselmo didn’t want Nidora to worry at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Baka gutom lang ito.” (I might just be starving.) That’s when Nidora tried to encourage Anselmo to eat. “Kumain muna tayo, Anselmo. Talagang nakita na kita.” (Let’s eat first. Now that I have found you.)

Anselmo was hesitant. But he eventually showed Nidora to a nearby barbecue stand. His tone was apologetic. “Ito lang kasi ang nakayanan ko eh. Kumakain ka ba nito?” (This is all I can afford. Do you eat this?) The camera at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary showed the meat cooked on the grill. It’s pieces of chicken intestines skewered on sticks. Nidora had apprehensions upon seeing the food. “Hindi kasi kami kumakain niyan eh. Hindi ba madumi yan, Anselmo? Pinagbilinan kasi akong wag kumain niyan.” (We don’t eat that. Isn’t it dirty, Anselmo? We were told not to eat that.) Anselmo assured Nidora that it’s clean. “Hindi mo pa natitikman. Subukan mo muna, Nidora. Wag kang matakot.” (You haven’t tasted it yet. Try it first. Don’t be afraid.)

The appearance alone of the grilled chicken intestines made Nidora skeptical. “Nagtitiwala ako sa yo. Pero bakit yan ang hitsura niyan?” (I trust you. But why do they look like that.) Seems like she didn’t even know that they are chicken intestines. They looked different compared to meat cooked at the mansion. Anselmo convinced Nidora at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Subukan mo muna, Nidora.” (Try it first, Nidora.) And he helped her eat.

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora soon was ready to eat it. “Anselmo, akala ko ba titikman ko na.” (I thought I am about to eat it.) Anselmo was blowing on the grilled chicken intestines, concerned that it would scald Nidora. “Mainit pa.” (It’s still hot.) Lola Nidora read her diary entry at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode further. “Si Anselmo ang nagturo sa akin na kumain ng isaw.” (Anselmo taught me how to eat grilled chicken intestines.)

Soon, Nidora liked it. “Ang sarap.” (It tastes great.) Nidora loved it so much. She ate more. Anselmo got worried upon seeing Nidora eat so fast. “Dahan dahan lang. Baka mabulunan ka.” (Careful. You might choke.) Nidora was so happy at discovering new food. “Ngayon lang kasi ako nakakain ng ganito, Anselmo.” (This is the first time for me to eat this, Anselmo.)

And Lola Nidora reminisced eating street food for the first time at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Ayun na nga. Dun nagsimula kung pano ko naging paborito ang isaw. Si Anselmo ang nagturo sa aking kumain ng isaw. Diyan nagsimula ang pagkagusto namin sa isaw.” (So there. My love for grilled chicken intestines as a favorite food has started. Anselmo taught me how to eat it.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo was right. Nidora soon choked. In between gasps of breath, she called for Anselmo. “Anselmo ….” Anselmo quickly ran back to the grill. There was no drinking water close to it. But he tried to get something to drink. Senator Tito then saw what he picked up at the stall. “Suka yan ah.” (That’s vinegar.) Nidora had difficulty drinking the vinegar. But since there is no other liquid nearby, she drank it.

Anselmo tapped Nidora’s back too, thinking that it would help. “Okay ka lang ba?” (Are you alright?) It was the first time that Nidora ate heartily without having to worry about table manners. “Nabigla ako kasi di ko alam na ganun pala ang lasa nun. Ang sarap pala. Salamat ha?” (I was perplexed because I didn’t expect it to taste like that. It tastes great. Thank you.) Anselmo was happy at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode too. “Walang anuman.” (You’re welcome.)

Lola Nidora then read in her diary entry how Donya Ariana learned of Beyonce’s interference. “Nung mga panahon na yun, galit na galit si Mama kay Beyonce. Sinubukan lang pala ni Mama si Beyonce.” (At that time, Mama was furious at Beyonce. Turns out that she only tested the maid.) Beyonce was crying, begging Donya Ariana to stop whipping her. Her broken English remained at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Stop hurting me. It’s very ouch.”

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana kept whipping her maid further. “Sinasabi ko na nga ba. Kasabwat ka ni Nidora. Etong sa ‘yo!” (I knew it. You were Nidora’s cohort. Take this!) It wasn’t clear if she was the only maid in the House of Zobeyala. But Beyonce was the closest that Nidora ever got to having her own nanny. The audience could still remember how Lola Nidora mentioned at the ALDUB Love on Top episode how she never had a nanny to call her own until Divina came along.

Beyonce’s English may still be broken. But she tried to make sense in the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “I don’t know where she is! Why don’t you give them the freedom to fall in love, Senyora?” Donya Ariana does not appreciate a chambermaid that talks back. “At sino ka para turuan ako kung anong dapat? Ha? Isa ka lang alipin! Hampaslupa! Ilabas mo si Nidora! Pag di mo nilabas si Nidora, ipapakulong ko kayong lahat. Pati lahat ng EB Babes. Ipapalapa ko kayo sa mga alaga kong leon. Nasan si Nidora?”

(And who are you to teach me what is appropriate? Huh? You’re just a slave! A nincompoop! Reveal Nidora’s whereabouts! If you didn’t reveal Nidora, I would have all of you imprisoned. Including all of the EB Babes. I would have you ravaged by my pet lion. Where is Nidora?) [The EB Babes are the resident female dancers of Eat Bulaga. It’s the same group that Anne Boleche belonged to. Anne Boleche played the role of Beyonce a.k.a. YayaMot.]

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Beaten to a pulp, Beyonce was still stubborn though. “I don’t want to tell.” Donya Ariana’s physical and verbal abuse worsened at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Sumagot ka! Sumagot ka!” (Answer me! Answer me!) Beyonce was still defiant. “I don’t want to tell. I told you. I hate you.” Donya Ariana couldn’t care less. “Sabihin mo kung nasan si Nidora!” (Tell me where is Nidora!) Beyonce could only endure so much before she gives in. “Okay! Stop it! Okay! I will tell. She is in the hospital, Senyora.”

Donya Ariana’s overconfidence got the best of her by not asking anything more. [That or there aren’t really that many hospitals in 1945.) She considered the search for Anselmo as a walk in the park. “Konti lang ang hospital dito. Tiyak matatagpuan ko rin agad yang si Anselmo.” (There are only a few hospitals around here. I would surely find Anselmo.)

Beyonce apologized to Nidora in her absence at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Nidora, sorry. I tell your Mom. Sorry, Nidora.” Donya Ariana hasn’t forgotten about Beyonce though. “At ikaw, Beyonce. Hindi pa ako tapos sa yo. Dudurugin kita.” (And you, Beyonce. I am not done with you yet.) She slammed Beyonce with an elbow drop.

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora had to pause reading the diary at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. After the Sugod Bahay errand, she talked to Divina on the phone. “Divina, bilisan mo diyan. May ipapabili pa kong gamot sa ‘yo.” (Hurry up. I need you to buy me medicine.) Divina was soon at Broadway Centrum. She was with Alden to help her pick a dress for the Vic-Pauleen wedding. “San ba? San mo nilagay?” (Where? Where did you put it?)

Alden helped Divina to the dressing room. “Eto na.” (Here.) Lola Nidora talked to Divina. “Hello, Divina. Nasan ka na? Nasan ka na ba?” (Where are you? Where have you been?) Divina hasn’t returned to where Lola Nidora and Donya Tinidora sat at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. She’s at the Broadway Centrum. “Lola, kasama ko po si Alden ngayon kasi kukunin ko po yung damit.” (Granny, I’m with Alden since I had to pick up my dress.)

Lola Nidora was a little suspicious. “Bakit naman kasi si Alden ang pipili?” (Why does Alden had to be the one to pick?) Divina was then checking the dresses one by one. Alden left her first to check on something. Divina didn’t like it that she was left to pick all by herself. Later, Alden asked Divina from where he stood. “May napili ka na?” (Have you picked one?) Divina has checked mostly dresses she didn’t like. “Wala pa.” (None yet.) Alden then called Divina from outside the dressing room at the ALDUB 28th Weekly episode. “Halika dito. May sasabihin ako sa yo.” (Come here. I have something to tell you.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora had to remind Lola Nidora that it’s Thursday. “Weeksary nila, ate.” (It’s the ALDUB 28th Weeksary.) Seeing that Alden’s not yet done preparing. Lola Nidora slightly distracted Divina. It was also a convenient excuse to remind her which dress should she pick. “Divina, ayoko na maiksi-iksi. Wag yung labas ang likod, hija.” (I don’t want a short dress. Not even backless.) Alden was spreading some petals outside the dressing room. “Sandali lang po.” (Just a moment.) Bossing Vic chided that Alden is making a mess at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.

Divina had a little difficulty picking dresses. “Wag daw yung litaw ang likod, sabi ni Lola.” (I was told not to pick a backless dress by granny.) Soon, Divina found time to face Alden. Divina came out and saw Alden with a bouquet of flowers. Alden greeted Divina. “Happy weeksary.” Divina was happy as she thought that Alden had forgotten. Alden then led Divina to the mock garden by the gazebo. He had it prepared for the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.

Alden told Divina to sit down. Divina sat where she stood. Alden had to remind her to sit by the bench, not on the floor. “May sorpresa ako sa yo. Hindi diyan!” (I have a surprise for you. Don’t sit there!) Divina has a tendency to take things literally even at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Hindi mo naman sinabi eh.” (You didn’t say so.)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden then brought out his gift apart from the bouquet at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Meron akong dinalang hopia. Nung nakita ko kina Lola Nidora at kay Anselmo. Yung mga simpleng bagay, sumasarap at nagiging espesyal pag kasama mo ang mahal mo.” (I brought some hopia [Chinese-inspired bread with filling]. When I saw Granny Nidora and Anselmo. [I thought] Simple food tastes better and becomes special when you are with the one you love.)

Divina tried to lighten the situation. “Baka mabulunan din naman ako.” (I might choke too.) For this, Alden came prepared. “Siempre may dala akong tubig.” (Of course I brought some water.) Divina then shared the hopia with Alden. She helped him bite the hopia. And Alden did the same. It’s just that Divina’s bite was larger. Soon, Divina felt a little choked too. “Alden … Alden, sabi mo, handa ka.” (Alden, you said that you were ready.) Alden kept his word and helped Divina drink some water from a tumbler at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode.

After eating hopia at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. Alden asked Divina to dance the waltz. There were already dancing for a few seconds when Senator Tito asked. “Di ba puedeng dito na lang kayo magsayaw?” (Can you just dance here [at the stage] instead?) Alden and Divina obliged. They walked to the stage not from Alden’s den but from the side stage. They continued their dance after greeting the audience.

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora realized how Alden and Divina had it easier on their love story. “May mga masasarap talagang balikan. May mga magagandang bagay. Alden. Divina. Naluluha ako kapag tinitingnan ko kayo. Naiinggit ako. Sana marami kayong natutunan sa kwento ko.” (There are things that feels great to recall. Beautiful things. Alden. Divina. I get teary-eyed just looking at you. I feel envious. I hope you’d learn from my story.)

Beyonce was later shown still getting beaten up by her employer, Donya Ariana. “Senyora!” Boss Joey suggested that Beyonce’s beating be done onstage too. “Dito rin kayo magsampalan.” (Slap onstage too.) Donya Ariana was dragging Beyonce around the place. The ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode has officially entered magic realism territory. And while Donya Ariana is at it, she then asked some folks at the KalyeSerye commentary panel. “May nakita ba kayong matipunong lalaki na kumukurap kurap na may kasamang babaeng kulot?” (Have you seen a muscular man that blinks accompanied by a girl with curly hair?) All of them said no.

Boss Joey quipped. “Mukhang nananakit.” (She looked like she naturally hurts people.) Donya Ariana resumed to beating Beyonce. “Hindi ko malalamang kasabwat mo si Nidora?” ([You think] I wouldn’t know that you are conniving with Nidora?) Beyonce’s subject and verbs still don’t agree. “Have mercy to me.” Donya Ariana continued giving her orders despite the bad state that Beyonce had fallen into at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Hanapin mo si Nidora!” (Find Nidora!)

ALDUB 28th Weeksary
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Everyone watching felt bad for Beyonce. ”Naku! Ihuhulog sa hagdan.” (She might be pushed down the stairs.) Donya Ariana was her old confrontational self at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode. “Ilabas nyo si Nidora!” (Bring out Nidora!) Allan K thought that he saw the mic hit Beyonce’s mouth. “Tumama yung mic.” Beyonce could only wince in pain. “Ouch!” Donya Ariana was screaming. “Ilabas nyo si Nidora.” (Release Nidora!) Boss Joey got a little worried. “Baka masampal ito.” (Somebody might get slapped.)

Donya Ariana confronted Allan K too. “Nasan si Nidora?” (Where is Nidora?) Allan K could only say he didn’t know. “Wala akong alam.” (I know nothing.) Donya Tinidora egged Donya Ariana to challenge Allan K to a catfight. “Sabunutan mo.” (Pull her hair.) Allan K insisted. “Hindi ko kilala si Nidora.” (I don’t know Nidora.) A half-lie. Donya Ariana almost gave him an elbow drop. Almost. [Because maybe Paolo can do that to Allan K as Donya Ariana. But to the TVJ, fat chance that Donya Ariana’s rough behavior be imposed on them.]

Because Donya Ariana can’t be too medievally violent towards any of the KalyeSerye commentators, she just turned her attention to some backstage crew. “Kayo mga bakla! Nasan si Nidora?” (You gays! Where is Nidora?) She slapped them and even stole one gay’s hat, exposing the thinning hair. She then returned onstage to ask Alden and Divina. “Kayong dalawa. Nakita nyo ba sina Nidora at Anselmo?” (You. Have you seen Nidora and Anselmo?)

Both Alden and Divina answered at the ALDUB 28th Weeksary. “Hindi po.” (No.) Lola Nidora’s painful memories of her mother, Donya Ariana Zobeyala, reopened old wounds. “At nangyari na nga ang ikinakatakot ko. May nangyaring masama.” (And what I feared has finally happened.) The truck horn honked off at the point. Ending the ALDUB 28th Weeksary on a cliffhanger.

Had the KalyeSerye not been live and not been presented as improv, would the magic realism treatment work? It has yet to be seen. What any worse behavior can be expected from Donya Ariana? Tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB 28th Weeksary episode replay.

For now, everyone is enamored with the ANSERA saga. It may not be “daily” or close to real-time like the Alden-Divina love story. But people appreciated the makeshift period drama that was unfolded. Must have been the off-the-fly comments from the KalyeSerye commentators that reminds everyone that it’s still a soap opera parody after all. How long would this angle be interesting? The subsequent episode recaps like the ALDUB 28th Weeksary will reveal. So follow us on our social media accounts at Facebook and Twitter to be continuously updated. We’d be expecting you.

ALDUB Forbidden Love: ANSERA Volume 3

Lola Nidora is immediately seen at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode staring into nowhere. She failed to notice Donya Tinidora’s arrival. She was happily carrying some gowns in preparation for the wedding. “Kayo! Patahi kayo ng patahi, minsan nyo lang naman isusuot. Ate, ikaw ba? May mga damit ka na ba? Ate!” (You! You like getting new gowns sown, only to wear it once. Elder sister, how about you? Have you got yourself a dress? ELDER SISTER!)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora gets bugged enough to notice her sister. Donya Tinidora kept on asking Lola Nidora. “Ano ka ba? Ang layo na naman ng mga tingin mo.” (What? You’re staring into nowhere again.) The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode shows Lola Nidora still remembering her lost love. “Ano ka ba, Tinidora? Nambubwisit ka na naman.” (What is it with you, Tinidora? You’re pestering me again.)

Donya Tinidora had to quote an OPM song to describe Lola Nidora’s state of mind at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Malayo ang tingin. Wala namang tinatanaw.” (Staring afar. Looking at nothing.) Lola Nidora spoke with an apologetic tone. “Marami lang ang sugat na nabuksan na akala ko ay naghilom.” (So many wounds reopened mistakenly thinking that they have healed.) Donya Tinidora had to remind Lola Nidora why these flashbacks are important. “Ibinabalik lang natin ang nakaraan para matuto sina Alden.” (We’re reliving the past in order for Alden [and Divina] to learn [from your experience].)

Lola Nidora tried to position herself in the present situation. “Ano naman yang mga pinili mo? Hindi naman bagay sa edad ko?” (What dresses have you selected for me? They’re not for my age.) Donya Tinidora scanned the gowns one by one. “Pag sinuot mo, bagay na rin yan. Kasal ni Victor.” (Once you wear them, it will fit you eventually. It’s Victor’s wedding [to Pauleen].) [Bossing Vic Sotto’s full name is Marvic Castello Sotto. But once in awhile, close friends call him Victor like here at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode.]

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora also anticipates some “packed lunch” from the reception. “Kailangan natin ng mga plastic para makapag-Sharon Cuneta. Balutin mo lahat ng tira.” (We need some plastic bags to do a Sharon Cuneta. Wrap all of the leftovers.) But of course, Donya Tinidora had to swerve the topic back at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Ano muna ang nangyari kay Anselmo?” (What happened to Anselmo by the way?)

Donya Tinidora even addressed the KalyeSerye commentators while waiting for Lola Nidora to speak. “Tuwing makikita niya si Anselmo, lagi niyang hawak ang dibdib niya.” (Every time she remembers Anselmo, she clutches her chest.) That’s when Lola Nidora had to reveal at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode what she learned about Anselmo.“May sakit si Anselmo. Matapos na bugbugin si Anselmo ng mga tauhan ni Mama, dinala siya sa hospital.” (Anselmo is sick. After he was beaten up by Mama’s thugs, he was brought to the hospital.)

The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode switches to black and white mode. The Intensive Care Unit is shown. Anselmo was conscious as Lola Nidora narrated. “Abot langit ang pag-aalala ko. At tanging Dios lang ang aking kapiling sa panahon na yan.” (I was worried so damn much. And only God was with me at that time.) Nidora was then shown praying the rosary.

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora felt bad for Anselmo. “Ate, nakakaawa naman pala si Anselmo. Ganun pala kalusugan niya, ate.” (Elder sister, Anselmo is such an pitiful man. So his health was that bad.) Lola Nidora stood up and walked away at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. Donya Tinidora tried to stop her. “Ate, sandali, wag mong gawin yan, ate. Kung may gagawin ka, dapat dati pa.” (Wait, don’t do that, elder sister. If you need to do something, you should have done it way back.) Lola Nidora didn’t like Donya Tinidora’s exaggerated reaction.“Pupunta lang ako sa sastre. Titingnan ko lang yung pinatahi ko.” (I would just go to the dressmaker. I would check the outfit I had paid for to sew.) With this, Donya Tinidora calmed down.

The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode was shown in snippets at Eat Bulaga. Soon the next scene was back at the intensive care unit. Allan K saw that a doctor has attended to Anselmo. “Ang taba nung doktor.” (What a chubby doctor [Ruby Rodriguez].) Ryan can’t help but comment. ”Busog sa vitamins yan.” (She’s full from taking vitamins.) As the Eat Bulaga hosts noticed how the doctor tried to ignore the comments. Anselmo DUBsnmashed again. “I’ll be seeing you in all familiar places.” But since he has not regained much of his strength yet. Anselmo was later seen teary-eyed.

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode resumes with Lola Nidora. She has returned from the dressmaker. Donya Tinidora saw her rent a gown too. “Kala ko ba nagpatahi ka? Papaarkila ka rin pala. Malay mo. Ikaw makasalo ng bouquet.” (I thought you had one made for you? You end up renting one now. Who nows? You might catch the bouquet this time.) Lola Nidora nixed any hopes of another marriage. “Naka-352 times na kong nakasalo ng bouquet, wala pa ring natutuloy na kasal. 19 years old pa lang, naiimbitahan na ako.” (I have caught the bouquet for about 352 times, and none of those incidents were followed by a wedding.)

Lola Nidora felt happy in reliving this part of her past in the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Masakit balikan. Pero masarap sariwain ang nakaraan. Pakiramdam ko deci nueve ulit ako.” (It’s painful to look back. But it feels good to revisit what transpired before. I feel like I’m 19 years old again.) Lola Nidora reopened her diary to the part where she stopped awhile ago. “Nang malakas lakas na si Anselmo, araw-araw siyang bumabalik. At araw araw din siyang tinataboy ng mga Rogelio. Matiyaga siyang naghihintay.” (Once Anselmo has regained his strength, he returned [to the mansion] every day. And everyday the Rogelios would shoo him away. He diligently waited.)

Bossing Vic saw the diligence in between blinks. “Wala si Boy Kurap talaga ano?” (Blinking Boy really exerted the effort.) Lola Nidora continued at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Araw araw bumabalik. Dinadaanan niya ang mansion. Nagbabakasakaling masisilayan niya ako.” (Everyday he returned. He kept passing by the mansion. Hoping that one day he will see me.)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo sat down close to the wall that surrounded the Zobeyala mansion. He DUBsmashed VST & Company’s hit song. “Ikaw lang ang aking mahal. Ang pag-ibig mo’y aking kailangan.” It was the song that played on the radio. Donya Tinidora interpreted it somewhat differently at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Iisa lang pala ang kanta noong araw, ate.” (So there was only one song then [on the airwaves].)

Lola Nidora relived the days when Anselmo was just outside of their home, waiting for her. “Araw araw naghihintay sa kin. Nang umupo na siya sa harap ng mansion natin, nagda-DUBsmash. Dala ang maliit na quadrosonic. Lubos ang pangungulila.” (Everyday he waited for me. When he sat in front of our mansion, he was DUBsmashing. He carried the little radio. He longed for me.) Anselmo was seen carrying the radio as his DUBsmash accompaniment at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode.

The interiors of the Zobeyala Mansion was shown with Donya Ariana’s portraits. She looked more like Miss Minchin of the Princess Sarah anime. Lola Nidora then related how she fared in the mansion at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Palagi rin akong nandun sa bintana. Nagbabakasakali rin na makita si Anselmo.” (I am always by the window. Hoping to see Anselmo.)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora remembered the day she got in touch with Anselmo again. “Natulungan ako ni Beyonce na makipagpalitan ng sulat kay Anselmo. Sinusulat ko lahat ng nararamdaman ko.” (Beyonce helped me write letters to Anselmo. I wrote everything I felt.) Bossing Vic was a little skeptical of Beyonce upon seeing her at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Baliw ba yan?” (Is she a loony?) Allan K had to point out who she is.“Hindi. Yan si Beyonce.” (No. That’s Beyonce.) [Maid Beyonce a.k.a. Yaya Mot was played by Anne Boleche.] Anselmo was shown reading the letters sent to him.

Nidora’s Letter English Translation
Minamahal kong Anselmo,

Walang kasing ligaya ang aking naramdaman

Nang muli akong makatanggap ng liham sa yo.

Ang mga liham mo ay parang patak ng ulan

Sa tuyong lupa ng tag-araw.

Ikaw ang pumapawi ng aking pag-uhaw

Sa tunay na pag-ibig.

Sana’y mapangiti ka ng liham kong ito.

Ipinabaon ko ang aking matamis na halik

Na nais kong lumapat sa iyong mga labi.

Sana’y nasa mabuti kalagayan ka.

At wala na ang iyong karamdaman.

Mag-iingat ka, Anselmo.

Para sa akin at para sa ating pag-ibig.

Magkikita pa rin tayo, Anselmo.

Darating din ang ating tamang panahon.

My Dearest Anselmo

I am as happy as no one else ever was

When I received another letter from you.

Your letters were like raindrops

To the dry soil in the summer.

You relieve me of my thirst

Of true love.

May this letter bring a smile to your face.

I enclose my sweet kiss

That I would like to land on your lips.

I hope that you are in good condition.

And may you be cured of your sickness.

Be safe, Anselmo.

For me and for our love.

We will meet again, Anselmo.

Our right time will come soon.

Lola Nidora recalled the first time she mentioned the now popular phrase. “At dun nagsimula ang tamang panahon. Ang paghihintay. Sa bawat sulat ko, bawat minuto ay naghihintay ako ng tamang tugon.” (And that’s how the right time started. The waiting. In every letter I sent, every minute awaits the right time.) The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode also showed Anselmo’s replies.

Anselmo’s Letter English Translation
“Sa aking irog na Nidora,

Sana’y nasa mabuti kang kalagayan.

Lagi mong tandaan na ikaw ang aking araw.

Ang aking buwan.

Ang aking bituin sa langit.

Ikaw ang nagbibigay ng liwanag sa akin.

Sa tuwing maaalala ko ang iyong mga ngiti

Unti unting nawawala ang aking mga karamdaman.

At napapalitan ng ligayang walang kapantay.

Nidora, hihintayin ko ang tamang panahon

Na tayo’y muling magkapiling.

Iniibig kita, Nidora.

Higit pa sa buhay ko.

Ang iyong irog,

Anselmo.”

To my beloved Nidora,

I hope you are in good condition.

Always remember that you are my sun.

My moon.

My star in heaven.

You give me light.

Every time I remember your smiles

I am relieved of all of my illnesses little by little.

And they are replaced by boundless joy.

Nidora, I will wait for the right time

That we will be together again.

I am in love with you, Nidora.

More than my own life.

Your beloved,

Anselmo.

Lola Nidora fondly remembered the days when she exchanged love letters with Anselmo. “Naging masaya ang aming pagsusulatan. Ngunit iyon ay hindi nagtagal.” (Our exchange of letters made us happy. But it didn’t last for so long.) The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode then showed young Nidora. She was too preoccupied to notice Donya Ariana pass by the coffee table. Lola Nidora relayed what happened. “Habang ako’y nagsusulat nang buong puso. Nahuli ako ng Mama na sumusulat kay Anselmo. Natakot ako kay Mama.” (While I was writing with all of my heart. Mama caught me writing to Anselmo. I was so afraid of Mama.)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana saw that the letter is for Anselmo. She tore it apart and threw the crumpled pieces to Nidora’s face. Lola Nidora occasionally paused in the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode to refresh her memory. “Ayun na nga. Nang mahuli kami ng Mama, lalo siyang nagalit sa amin.” (And so there. When Mama caught us, she got angrier at us.)

Donya Tinidora felt bad for Lola Nidora at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Ate, sayang naman. Akala ko pa naman, magiging masaya na kayo ni Anselmo. Di ba may nararamdaman si Anselmo? Sabihin mo na. Di mo pa sa akin sinasabi eh.” (That is just too bad, elder sister. All along I thought that you will be happy with Anselmo. Anselmo has an affliction, right? Please tell me. You haven’t told me yet.)

Lola Nidora confirmed Anselmo being sick as of the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Malala ang sakit ni Anselmo. Mamaya ko na sasabihin sa yo. Mag-Sugod Bahay naman tayo.” (Anselmo had a grave illness. I will tell you later. Let’s take the Sugod Bahay errand first.) Donya Tinidora was upset at being made to wait. “Kayo talagang pamilya kayo!” (You and your family!) The KalyeSerye commentators had to remind her that she’s a family member too. “Hoy! Kapamilya mo yan! Uy!” (She’s your family too.) It brough Donya Tinidora back to her senses.“Ay oo nga pala.” (Yes. I forgot.) They went to their errand once the winner was determined.

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora continued where she stopped. “Alam mo ba, lalong naging malupit ang Mama.” (You know, Mama got harsher.) The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode switches to black-and-white mode again. Donya Ariana was in the car chastising young Nidora. “Inaayos ko na ang mga papeles mo. Pero itatago muna kita dahil alam na ni Anselmo ang bahay natin. Nakuha nyo pa talagang magsulatan ha?” (I had your documents arranged. But I will hide you for the meantime because Anselmo already knew where we live. And you have the nerve to write each other, huh?)

Donya Ariana grabs Nidora’s hands. It was revealed that she handcuffed her own daughter at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. Donya Ariana ignored Nidora’s cries.“Tingnan ko lang kung makapagsulatan pa kayo. Sige. Gumawa ka pa ng liham kay Anselmo. Yan ang napapala mo dahil matigas ang ulo mo. Kung hindi, pati pamilya ni Anselmo, ipapalipol ko.” (Let’s see if you can write each other again. Go ahead. Write another letter to Anselmo. That’s your punishment because you’re hard-headed. Otherwise, I would have Anselmo’s family wiped out too.)

Nidora was horrified at the level of her mother’s cruelty at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Mama, wag naman po kayong ganun.” (Please don’t do that.) Donya Ariana was serious. “Wag mo kong subukan, Nidora. Wag mo kong subukan dahil wala kang mapapala sa lalaking yun.” (Don’t try me, Nidora. Don’t you even dare because you will get nothing from that man.)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana turned her attention to the maid. She revealed her new punishment to Nidora in front of the maid. “Beyonce? Dito ka muna sa bahay nina Beyonce. Walang makakapag-isip na dito ka nakatira. Di ka na masusundan ni Anselmo. Makinig ka lamang sa akin at magiging masaya ka.” (You stay here at Beyonce’s house. No one would ever think that you live here. Anselmo cannot follow you here. If you only listen to me then you will be happy.) The KalyeSerye commentators present at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode could only feel bad for Nidora.

Nidora kept crying as she pleaded. “Sa piling ni Anselmo lamang po ako magiging maligaya. Payagan nyo na po kasi kami.” (I will only be happy with Anselmo’s embrace. Please let us be.) Donya Ariana slapped Nidora at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Lapastangan! Hindi mo na binigyan ng kahihiyan ang pamilya natin!” (How rude of you! You never thought of the family honor! ) Nidora was prepared for the worst. “Mama, itakwil nyo na lamang po ako. Hindi ko kailangan ang yaman ninyo, Mama. Iniibig ko si Anselmo.” (You can disown me now. I don’t need your riches, Mama. I am in love with Anselmo.)

Donya Ariana laughed. It was the sarcastic laugh heard at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Nagpapatawa ka ba? Hindi kita itatakwil. Bakit? Ayokong malahian tayo ng isang hampaslupa. Para magkasama kayo ni Anselmo?” (Are you trying to be funny? I won’t disown you. Why? I don’t want that scoundrel to breed into the family. So that you will be with Anselmo?)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora kept on pleading her case. It may seem hopeless to change Donya Ariana’s mind at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. But she took a risk. “Aanhin ko ang yaman kundi ko mahal ang makakapiling ko? Tanggalin mo na ‘to. Ang tunay na yaman ay kung paano magmahal ang isang tao, Mama. Tandaan mo yan. Ang tunay na pagmamahal, yun ang tunay na yaman. Ganyan ka na ba katigas, Mama? Alisin mo na ‘to.” (What will I do with the riches if I don’t love the person I’d end up with? Remove these [handcuffs]. True riches is measured by how you love a person, Mama. You keep that in mind. True love is the true treasure. Have you gotten that tough? Remove these.)

Donya Ariana was almost impressed. Almost. “Magaling ka na sa hugot lines ha? Anong alam mo sa pag-ibig, aber? May gatas pa ang mga labi mo!” (Now you’re good with the quotable quotes, huh? What do you know about love, hmm? You’re still young!) Donya Ariana clutched Nidora’s face to force her to stare at her. Nidora then turned her attention to Beyonce once Donya Ariana has released her grip at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Beyonce, tulungan mo ‘ko. Alisin nyo na to sa ‘kin.” (Beyonce, help me.)

Lola Nidora revealed how she liked to spew love quotes even then. “Bata pa lang ako, mahilig na ako sa mga hugot lines. Sensitive ako sa mga nangyayari.” (At a young age, I already liked quotable quotes. I was sensitive to the things happening around me.) Donya Tinidora could only cry. “Ang sama-sama naman ng Mama. Sobra siya.” (Mama is so wicked. She’s too much.) It has yet to be revealed how Donya Ariana handled the love lives of her other daughters, Donya Tidora and Donya Tinidora. As of the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode, both of Lola Nidora’s sisters are still unmarried.

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana is cruel to Nidora. Her snooty behavior is imposed even on her employees like Beyonce. “Beyonce, ikaw na muna bahala kay Nidora. Diyan na muna siya sa mga kamag-anak mong patay-gutom.” (You handle Nidora. I will leave her there with your dirt-poor relatives.) Beyonce’s horrendous grammar was then heard at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Yes, Senyora. I will take good in charge of Nidora. She will not scape out for sure.”

Donya Ariana switched her attention back to Nidora. “At ikaw. Sa oras na malaman kong nakikipagkita ka pa rin kay Anselmo, magugunaw ang mundo mo. At dudurugin ko kayong dalawa.” (And you. The moment I learn that you still see Anselmo, I will destroy your world. And I will crush both of you.) Nidora could only complain of Donya Ariana’s tight, merciless grip. “Mama, nasasaktan ako.” (I am hurt.) Donya Ariana was confident of her plan at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode.”Hindi ka na masusundan ni Anselmo dito.” (Anselmo will never follow you here.) With this, she cackled like a hyena.

Nidora kept on calling her mother. Beyonce held her to avoid getting into the car. As Donya Ariana’s Cadillac sped away, Nidora thought of Anselmo. Anselmo was then shown at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode DUBsmashing to Cole Porter’s “Night And Day”. Nidora could only cry from where she stood with Beyonce.

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Beyonce then revealed to Nidora upon checking that Donya Ariana had gone far away. Her grammar was worsened by bad translation.“I have another letter from Anselmo. But first, I have to remove the raisins.” She meant to say at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode that she will remove Nidora’s handcuffs”posas”. She translated the word “posas” to raisins. Raisins in Tagalog was “pasas”.

Still Nidora got the gist of what Beyonce was trying to say. “Beyonce, salamat ha?” (Thank you.) Beyonce was happy to help like when she helped Nidora with the letters. “Of course. All the way support. Your Mama is gone. You can read now.” Beyonce handed Nidora the letter after getting rid of the handcuffs. She then found Anselmo’s most recent letter at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode.

Anselmo’s Letter English Translation
Para sa aking bituin, Nidora.

Sa aking pag-iisa

Minsa’y nais kong sumuko.

Ngunit alam ng aking puso

Na magkikita pa tayong dalawa.

Yan ang nagbibigay lakas sa akin.

Sa aking pagtulog,

Ikaw ang aking panaginip.

Mukha mo ang nakikita ko

Sa tuwing kukurap ang aking mga mata.

Alagaan mo ang iyong sarili.

Dahil sabik na sabik na akong masilayan

Ang iyong mga ngiti, Nidora.

Wag kang malulungkot sa aking balita.

Ako’y nasa hospital

Upang malaman ang aking kalagayan.

Matagal na itong karamdaman ko.

Pero wag kang mag-alala

Malakas ako dahil sa pag-ibig natin.

Hanggang sa muli.

Ang iyong irog,

Anselmo.

For my star, Nidora.

In my loneliness

Sometimes I wanted to quit.

But I know in my heart

That we will meet again.

It’s what gives me strength.

In my sleep,

You are in my dreams.

I see your face

Every time I blink.

Take care of yourself.

Because I am so excited to behold

Your smiles, Nidora.

Don’t be saddened by my news.

I am in the hospital

To know of my condition.

This affliction has been bothering me for so long now.

But don’t worry.

I am strong because of our love.

Until we meet again.

Your beloved,

Anselmo.

Beyonce saw that Nidora was saddened by what she read. “I feel you.” Bossing Vic had to check if he heard Beyonce correctly. “What?” At this point in the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. Nidora already knew of Anselmo’s illness. “Pero, may lihim si Anselmo na hindi niya sinasabi sa liham.” (But Anselmo had a secret that he omitted from the letter.)

The ALDUB Forbidden Love episode showed the hospital again. A little chubby kid was by Anselmo’s foot. Bossing Vic had to ask. “Doktor ba to?” (Is this a doctor?) Boss Joey had a worse guess. “Akala ko may anak sa iba.” (I thought he had a child by another woman.) The lady doctor came back to tell Anselmo her diagnosis. “Anselmo, kailangan mong malaman ang iyong kalagayan. Nais naming dugtungan ang iyong buhay.” (You need to know your situation. We want to extend your life.)

ALDUB Forbidden Love
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo braced himself for the worst. “Ano pong ibig nyong sabihin?” (What do you mean?) The lady doctor tried to tell him calmly. “Meron kang TSU. Tumor sa utak. Kailangan nating tanggalin ang tumor sa lalong madaling panahon.” (You have a brain tumor. We need to remove the tumor immediately.) Anselmo didn’t think that he had time [or money] for this situation at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Di ako maaaring mamatay. Merong naghihintay sa akin.” (I can’t die. Someone is waiting for me.)

The lady doctor tried to tell Anselmo what he needed to know. “Kailangan natin ng milagro.” (We need a miracle.) Anselmo thought more of the little time left for him. “Di nyo po naiintindihan.” (You don’t understand.) She then sent instructions to the nurses at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode. “Ihanda ang ineksyon.” (Prepare the injection.) Anselmo broke down. “Hindi po. Hinihintay ako ni …. Hindi po ako puedeng mamatay, doktor. Gusto ko pa pong mabuhay. Ayoko pa pong mamatay.” (No. She’s waiting for me. I can’t die, doc. I want to live. I don’t want to die yet.)

Anselmo tried to tell the doctor what he needed to say. “Doktor, may sasabihin po ako sa inyo. Meron po akong babaeng iniibig. Hinihintay pa po niya ako, doktor. Ayoko pong malaman niya. Parang awa nyo na po. Tulungan nyo po ako.” (Doc, I need to tell you something. There is a woman that I am in love with. She’s waiting for me doc. I don’t want her to know. I am begging you. Please help me.) The doctor at the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode understood. “Tutulungan ka namin. Dudugtungan namin ang buhay mo, Anselmo.” (We will help you. We will extend your life.)

Nidora saw that Anselmo didn’t mention the doctor’s diagnosis on his last letter. She then told Beyonce. “Beyonce, kailangan kong puntahan si Anselmo. Kahit kapalit ng buhay ko.” (I need to go to Anselmo. Even in exchange of my life.) Beyonce supported Nidora. “Go. Follow your dreams.” Nidora braced herself to see Anselmo. She hugged Beyonce before leaving. “Salamat, Beyonce.” (Thanks, Beyonce.) The ALDUB Forbidden Love ended with Nidora running away.

How far will Donya Ariana go to keep Nidora away from Anselmo? Tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB Forbidden Love episode replay. Subscribe to Eat Bulaga’s YouTube channel too by clicking here.

The ANSERA saga may seem like a way to explain Lola Nidora’s violent behavior in the early days of the KalyeSerye. But as they often say in psychology, sometimes the abused evolves into the abuser unless corrected. How harsh would the next episodes be? Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter. We’d be expecting you.

ALDUB Lihim ng Kahapon: ANSERA Volume 2

The ALDUB Lihim ng Kahapon episode opens with Donya Tinidora talking to Lola Nidora. “Alam mo, sa kwento mo, ngayon ko naunawaan. Kaya pala masama ang ugali mo.” (You know, based on your story, I understand now. Now I know why you were wicked.) Lola Nidora can’t tell if Donya Tinidora is being honest or being her old sarcastic self. “Grabe ka sa akin. Malambot naman ang puso ko. Pinatigas lang ng panahon.” (How harsh of you. I have a soft heart. It was just hardened with time.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: @jaysondmx

Donya Tinidora somewhat compared Lola Nidora’s story to what happened lately. “Yang pinagdaanan nyo ni Anselmo, ganyang ganyan din ang pinagdaanan nina Yaya at Alden.” (What you’ve been through with Anselmo, that’s the same story that nanny and Alden went though.) Lola Nidora disagreed at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Higit na masakit ang nangyari sa amin ni Anselmo. Hanggang ngayon, nasa puso ko pa rin.” (What happened to us of Anselmo is way more painful. Until now, it’s in my heart.)

Donya Tinidora didn’t think Lola Nidora has moved on as of the ALDUB Lihim ng Kahapon episode. “Nasa puso mo pa rin ba? Nung panahon mo, hindi pa ba uso ang move on move on?” (It’s still in your heart? Do you even know the concept of moving on in your time?) Lola Nidora can’t say herself. “Hindi ko alam. Hindi mo alam kung ano ang nangyari. Kasi pinagbakasyon kayo ni Mama noon sa farm natin sa Zambales.” (I don’t know. You didn’t know what happened. Because Mama sent you [of Tidora] to our farm in Zambales.)

Donya Tinidora is eager to know what did she miss. “O sige. Hindi na namin alam kung ano ang nangyari. Ano ang nangyari?” (Okay. Since we didn’t know what happened. What happened then?) Lola Nidora set the pace at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Itutuloy ko kung ano ang nangyari.” (I will continue where we left off.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora didn’t open her diary at the ALDUB Lihim ng Kahapon episode. But she still remembered everything as if it was yesterday. “Nagtangka akong tumakas noon dahil kay Mama. Pero naabutan niya ako. Mabilis tumakbo ang Mama. Nakalimutan kong champion pala siya sa track-and-field. Inuwi niya ako sa mansion. At naramdaman ko ang lupit ng mama natin. Ayaw niya kay Anselmo na ang tanging kasalanan lang ay ipinanganak siyang mahirap.”

(I attempted to escape then because of Mama [ANSERA Volume 1]. But she caught me. Mama ran fast. I forgot that she used to be a champion in track-and-field. She took me to the mansion. And I experienced the cruelty of our mother. She hated Anselmo whose only crime is that he was born poor.)

Donya Ariana Miley Zobeyala dragged young Nidora into the mansion. “Matigas talaga ang ulo mo, Nidora.” (You’re really hard-headed, Nidora.) She dragged Nidora so hard. She fell to the floor. “Mama, wala pong kasalanan si Anselmo.” (Mama, Anselmo is not at fault.) Donya Ariana scolded Nidora further at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Hindi ka na sumusunod sa akin. Simula ngayon, hindi ka na makakalabas ng mansion.” (You don’t obey me anymore. From now on, you can never get out of the mansion.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora could only complain to her mother. “Ang lupit mo, Mama. Mama, mahal ko po si Anselmo.” (How cruel of you, Mama. I love Anselmo.) Donya Ariana got agitated even more at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Sumasagot ka? Ha? Natututo ka na kay Anselmo. Magaspang ang ugali. Crispin! Basilio! Dalhin ninyo si Nidora sa taas. Ikandado nyo ang pinto.” (You have learned how to talk back? Huh? You have learned from Anselmo. You’ve learned rough manners. Crispin! Basilio! Take Nidora upstairs. Lock the door.)

Nidora protested. “Mama! Umiibig lang ako, Mama.” (I am only in love, Mama.) Donya Ariana didn’t believe her. ”Pag-ibig. Hmp.” She turned her attention to Nidora’s nanny, Beyonce. “Dadalhan mo lamang ng pagkain si Nidora. Pero hindi siya puedeng bumaba dito.” (You can only bring food to Nidora. But she will never get out.) Beyonce spoke in broken English. “I will make your command seriously. I will keep an eye on Nidora.” Donya Ariana then contemplated at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Tingnan ko lang kung makipagkita pa siya kay Anselmo.” (Let’s see if you can even see Anselmo now.)

At the balcony by her bedroom. Nidora DUBsmashed a song that played on the radio. “I’ve never been in love before.” She was alone in her room at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. Lola Nidora implied in her narration that she shared the room with her sisters. But on the day that she was grounded, she was on her own. “Pinagbakasyon kasi kayo noon ni Mama sa Zambales. Kaya hindi ninyo alam ang nangyari.” (Mama sent you to Zambales then. So you didn’t know what happened.) It made Donya Tinidora afraid of their mother. “Ate, natatakot ako sa Mama. Kaya pala ang sama ng ugali mo.” (Elder sister, I am scared of Mama. That explains your wicked behavior.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

In her bedroom. Beyonce tried to feed Nidora. This time, Beyonce’s grammar worsened. “Nidora? If you don’t eat, tummy empty. Nidora, eat the food. Mama will get mad.” The pain brought back in the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode made Lola Nidora ask for her chewables again. “Rogelio! Rogelio! Rogelio! Ang chewybles ko!” (Give me my chewables!)

Donya Tinidora wanted to know more at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Ano ba ang nararamdaman mo, ate?” (What do you feel now, elder sister?) Lola Nidora scolded her men as if she didn’t hear Donya Tinidora. ”Baka gusto mo kong bigyan ng tubig.” (You might want to give me some water.) Donya Tinidora had to repeat what she said. “So anong nararamdaman mo, ate?” (What are you feeling?) That’s when Lola Nidora turned to her. “Eto na nga ang dahilan kung bakit ayaw kong buksan ang diary. Para may matutunan.” (This is why I don’t want to open the diary. So that you may learn.) She meant the last sentence for Alden and Divina.

Lola Nidora continued. “Ikinulong ako ni Mama noon sa mansion. Hindi ako makalabas. Ang tanging yaya ang naghahatid ng pagkain.” (Mama locked me up in the mansion. I can’t get out. Only the nanny brought me food.) Donya Ariana was calmly checking on Nidora through the maid, Beyonce. “Beyonce, kumusta si Nidora?” (How is Nidora?) Beyonce tried to explain her efforts at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Senyora, ayaw po niyang kumain. I did my best. But my best wasn’t good enough.”

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana was upset at how stubborn Nidora had gotten. She then scolded Beyonce. “Nasan yung pagkain?” (Where’s the food?) Beyonce was back to her broken English at the ALDUB Lihim ng Kahapon episode. “Tummy achy eh.” Before Donya Ariana would get too angry with her chambermaid, she changed the topic. “Sige. Mamaya pumunta ka sa basement.” (Okay. Go to the basement later.)

Donya Ariana let Beyonce hear her plans for Nidora. “Ipapadala ko si Nidora sa America. Hahahaha! Umalis ka na! Shoo!” (I will send Nidora to the United States. [Evil laugh.] Get out! Shoo!) She let Beyonce go first before voicing out her thoughts. “Sa America ngayon mapupunta. Tingnan ko lang kung masundan ka pa ni Anselmo.” (You will end up in the US now. Let’s see if Anselmo can reach you there.) Donya Ariana cackled like a witch at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. [It was a touch of consistency to the theme of parodying soap operas in the Philippines.]

At the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. Lola Nidora recalled the inner turmoil.“Hindi ako makakain noon.” (I can’t bring myself to eat.) And since it’s a parodyy, the KalyeSerye commentators can’t help but notice the flaws in the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Ba’t may mga naka-mini noon?” (How come some women wear mini-skirts then?) The year was 1945. And the women in mini-skirts are seen onscreen with Anselmo.

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora recounted the days when Anselmo was looking for her. “Nalaman niya ang address sa aming kolehiyo. Pawis na pawis si Anselmo. Pero hindi nagagalaw ang bangs. Masama na ang pakiramdam niya. Naghahalo ang pagod, gutom, sama ng loob at uhaw. Nahihilo na. Pero tuloy pa rin ang lakad. Hanggang naituro ang mansion ng Mama. At natagpuan na nga ni Anselmo ang aming mansion.”

(He learned of our address from my college. Anselmo was sweaty. But his bangs were intact. He is already feeling bad. Mixed emotions engulfed him brought about by fatigue, hunger, ill feelings and thirst. He’s already dizzy. But he kept on walking. Until someone pointed him to the direction of Mama’s Mansion. And Anselmo found our mansion.)

Lola Nidora continued Anselmo’s efforts as of the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Pinilit niyang pumasok.Sira pala ang doorbell. Buti na lang at wala ang mga guardia. Pero hahanapin niya ako. Pumasok si Anselmo sa pinto. Pumasok siya ng walang pagaalinlangan. Nakita niya ang mama sa sala.” (He tried to come in. The doorbell was broken. Good thing the guards weren’t around. But he will look for me. Anselmo entered the front door. He entered without a doubt. He saw Mama by the living room.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Later, Anselmo changed his mind about entering the house by trying to call Nidora from outside. He did not get out of the gate. He was calling Nidora carefully as he searched the window where Nidora spoke. Once he saw the window where Nidora waited at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. Anselmo was elated. “Kay tagal kitang hinanap, Nidora.” (I looked for you for so long, Nidora.)

Nidora is just as happy to see Anselmo at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Mabuti nakapasok ka, Anselmo. Wala bang nakakita sa yo?” (Good thing you got in, Anselmo. Didn’t anybody see you?) Anselmo answered. “Wala. Wala ang mga guardia. Halika na. Sumama ka na sa akin.” (No one. The guards are nowhere. Come. Runaway with me.)

Lola Nidora recalled the difficulty of talking to Anselmo at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. Anselmo can’t enter her bedroom. And she was stuck at the balcony. “Gusto naming mag-usap. Pero baka marinig kami ni Mama at ng guardia. Pero may naisip kaming paraan.” (We would like to talk. But Mama and the guards might hear us. But we found a way.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Boss Joey got worried upon seeing Anselmo with the ladder. “Lola. Baka sumayaw yung katabi mo diyan.” (Granny. Your seatmate might suddenly dance.) Nidora was worried of Anselmo. ”Mag-iingat ka. Kumapit ka, Anselmo.” (Be careful. Grip the ladder tightly.) Anselmo realized too late how the ladder is not enough. “Bitin yung hagdan.” (The ladder was short.) Nidora had to think of Plan B at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Malayo pa eh. Bumaba ka muna. Delikado. Iisip ako ng paraan, Anselmo. Teka lang.” (It’s still far out. Get down first. It’s dangerous. I’d think of another way, Anselmo. Please wait.)

Lola Nidora then relayed an incident that viewers of the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon can definitely relate to. ”May naisip si Anselmo. May kinuha siya sa kanyang tampipi. Dahil hindi kami makapag-usap.” (Anselmo thought of another plan. He got his straw box. Because we can’t talk.) Anselmo was then shown with a chicken feather and a piece of paper. Allan K of the KalyeSerye commentary panel got the gist. “Pluma pa yung gamit.” (He even used a plume.) Boss Joey translated it for the viewers unfamiliar with the term. “Yung balahibo ng manok.” (It’s a chicken feather.)

Lola Nidora explained further. “At dun nagsimula ang fansign. At dahil sa fansign, nakapagusap kami nang hindi nagigising si Mama.” (And that’s how the fansign started. Because of the fansign, we conversed without waking up Mama.) In between fansigns, Anselmo and Nidora exchanged DUBsmash tracks. “You’re in love. You’re too shy to confess.” The KalyeSerye commentary panel was more familiar with Anselmo’s DUBsmash track here at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “My funny Valentine. Sweet comic Valentine. You make me smile with your heart.”

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora paused her narration. Donya Tinidora pressed her for further info. Lola Nidora doesn’t appreciate being rushed at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Bayaan mo munang sariwain ko ang mga nangyari.” (Let me refresh the events.) Donya Tinidora thought of it as unnecessary. ”Matagal na yun. Bilasa na yun.” (It’s been decades. Those memories are no longer fresh.) Donya Tinidora’s sarcasm worked on Lola Nidora. “Ayun na nga, nakalabas na ako ng mansion. Para makapiling si Anselmo.” (So there, I got out of the mansion. To be with Anselmo.)

Donya Tinidora threw a minor curveball just when Lola Nidora has resumed with her story.“Ang sungit ni Mama noon ano? Kaya pala ganyan ang ugali mo. Tapos balak mo pang magpakamatay? Bakit di mo tinuloy?” (Mama was so mean, right? That’s why you had a wicked attitude. Then you had plans to die? Why didn’t you push through with it?) Donya Tinidora slightly broke the fourth wall at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode upon seeing Donya Ariana at the other screen. “Ang pangit pala matulog ni Mama. Diyan pala ako nagmana.” (Mama has an ugly way of sleeping. So I got that attribute from her.)

Lola Nidora kept on with her story at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Ingat na ingat ako noon na lumabas ng mansion. Baka mahuli ako ni Mama. Natakot ako. Sinilip ko uli ang Mama. Natutulog ulit siya. At tinuloy ko ang paglabas ng mansion hanggang makalabas.” (I was so careful in coming out of the mansion. Mama might catch me. I was scared. I peeked at Mama again. She got back to sleep. And I pushed through with going out of the mansion until I’m done.) Donya Tinidora had to say it. “Mahaba pala ang biyas mo nung bata ka.” (You were long-legged when you were young.) She almost asked what happened to Nidora’s height upon reaching old age.

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon

Anselmo carefully rushed to Nidora upon seeing her out. They embraced like there was no tomorrow. They immediately went to the garden to frolic. Once tired. Anselmo rolled out a mat. Boss Joey remembered the ideal date during this time. “Picnic noong araw.” (A picnic in the old days.) Lola Nidora supported Boss Joey’s observation at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Kumain kami noon ni Anselmo. Masayang-masaya. Sa sobrang kilig ko, nabulunan ako. Walang tubig na mahanap si Anselmo. Hindi ako makahinga.” (We of Anselmo ate. We were so happy. I was so giddy that I choked. Anselmo can’t find any water nearby. I can’t breathe.)

Anselmo didn’t know what to do. Just when everyone thought that he’d kiss Nidora. Lola Nidora continued with her story at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Pero okay na ako.” (But soon I was fine.) Anselmo was happy to be with Nidora. “Nidora?” He was blinking faster than he was at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. Nidora found Anselmo’s mannerisms to be a little disturbing. “Kelan ba gagaling ang mata na yan?” (When would your eyes be healed?)

Anselmo had to explain the intensity of his mannerism. “Ganito kasi ako kapag kinakabahan.” (This is how I go every time I am nervous.) Nidora tried not to blink like Anselmo at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Hindi mo ba maikakalma yang mata mo? Ako’y nababahala, Anselmo.” (Can’t you calm your eyes? I’m worried, Anselmo.) Anselmo made a little suggestion. “Hawakan mo baka mabawasan.” (Touch them to lessen the blinks.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Nidora then touched Anselmo’s cheek close to his eyes. “Ganun lang ba yun kadali?” (Is it that easy?) Anselmo quickly calmed his eyes. He ended up staring straight to Nidora’s eyes at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Ikaw lang ang makapagpapagaling sa akin.” (Only you can heal me.) Nidora found Anselmo’s words a little too gratuitous. ”Anselmo, hindi ka pa rin nagbabago.” (You never changed.)

Anselmo’s eyes started blinking rigorously again. “Nidora?” Nidora got worried of Anselmo’s intensified blinking. ”Ayan na naman ang iyong mga mata.” (There you go with your eyes again.) Despite the uncontrolled blinking. Anselmo found the guts to tell Nidora at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. ”Gusto kong malaman mo. Iniibig kita.” (I want you to know. I am in love with you.) Nidora answered sweetly. “Anselmo, iniibig din kita. Ang kisig kisig mo pa din.” (I am in love with you too. You’re still as handsome as ever.)

Donya Ariana was soon awake from her deep slumber at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. She looked out of the garden and saw Anselmo and Nidora. Boss Joey immediately saw Donya Ariana pick up something. “Ay! Latigo! Latigo!” (A whip! A whip!) She immediately went forward to the couple and berated them. Nidora quickly shielded Anselmo. ”Mama! Mama! Huwag po!” (Please don’t!)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Ariana was furious. “Lapastangan!” (How disrespectful of you!) Anselmo was quickly down on his knees upon realizing the extent of Donya Ariana’s wrath at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. ”Senyora, patawarin nyo po ako.” (Madam, please forgive me.) Donya Ariana’s snooty behavior prevailed. “Anong karapatan mong tumuntong sa lupa ng mga mayayaman?” (What right do you have to set foot on the land of rich people?)

Anselmo was humble enough to accept Donya Ariana’s remarks. “Patawarin nyo po ako. Alam ko pong ako’y isang hamak lamang na hampaslupa. Pero minamahal ko po ang anak ninyo.” (Forgive me. I know that I am just a mere nobody. But I love your daughter.) It only agitated Donya Ariana more at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Ambisyoso! Pinaibig mo ang anak ko dahil gusto mong maging miyembro ng pamilya namin.” (You ambitious schmuck! You seduced my daughter because you wanted to be a member of our family.) Anselmo denied the accusation.“Hindi po totoo yan.” (It’s not true.)

Nidora supported Anselmo’s statement. “Mama, hindi po totoo yun.” (It’s not true.) Donya Ariana lashed out at Nidora too. “Isa ka pa! Suwail ka din!” (You too! You’re disobedient!) Anselmo tried to distract Donya Ariana at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode so she would not be too angry at Nidora. “Maawa po kayo, senyora.” (Have mercy, Madam.) Donya Ariana minced no words at rejecting Anselmo. “Gusto kong malaman mo na hindi katulad mo ang nababagay sa anak ko. Hindi ganyan ang pinangarap ko para sa aking anak.” (I want you to know that not someone like you is fit to be with someone like my daughter. That’s not what I wished for my child.)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo tried to plead with Donya Ariana. “Subalit tapat po ang pag-ibig ko sa anak nyo, senyora.” (But my love for your daughter is true, madam.) Donya Ariana didn’t think Anselmo is serious at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Komedyante ka pala. Bakit di ka lumabas sa bodabil? Baka doon, may matawa sa yo. Tingnan mo nga ang sarili mo. Oo, maputi ka. Pero amoy lupa.” (So you’re a comedian after all. Why not go to the vaudeville? People there might find you funny. Will you take a good look at yourself? Yes, you’re fair-skinned. But you smelled like dirt.)

Nidora found her own mother to be too harsh on Anselmo. “Mama, grabe naman po kayo. Mabuting tao po si Anselmo, Mama.” (You are too much. Anselmo is a good man, Mama.) Anselmo supported Nidora’s statement. “Senyora, mahirap man po ako. Wala man po ako ng kayamanan ng meron kayo. Mayaman po ako sa pag-ibig para sa inyong anak.” (Madam, I may be poor. I may not have the wealth that you possess. But I am rich in love for your child.)

Donya Ariana would hear none of it at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Wala akong panahon sa kabaliwan na yan. Crispin! Basilio! Sige, kunin nyo si Nidora.” (I don’t have time for that madness. Crispin! Basilio! Take Nidora away.) Nidora then feared the worst at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Mama! Wag nyo pong saktan si Anselmo!” (Don’t hurt Anselmo!)

ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Anselmo pleaded again with Donya Ariana after seeing the henchmen take Nidora away. “Senyora, maawa na po kayo. Wag nyo po kaming paglayuin ni Nidora. Parang awa nyo na. Pakinggan nyo po ako.” (Madam, have mercy. Don’t separate us of Nidora. I am begging you. Please listen to me.) At the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. Donya Ariana emphasized how insignificant Anselmo is to her. ”Hindi kita naririnig.” (I don’t hear you.) Nidora repeated her screams.”Wag nyo pong sasaktan si Anselmo.” (Don’t hurt Anselmo.) She broke free from Donya Ariana’s bodyguards and ran to embrace Anselmo.

Donya Ariana was livid. “Hoy! Mga lapastangan kayong dalawa!” (How rude can two of you get!) She called for more men to separate the young couple. Nidora feared the worst. She mentioned at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode how ruthless she was at her other lovers too. “Mama, wag nyo siyang sasaktan!” (Don’t hurt him!) Donya Ariana didn’t listen to Nidora either. She left instructions to her henchmen. “Sige. Kayo nang bahala diyan.” (You handle him now.)

The men started beating Anselmo. Nidora could only watch the men gang up on Anselmo. She still tried to beg mercy from her mother. ”Mama, tigilan nyo yan.” (Mama, stop that.) Lola Nidora recalled the pain of being helpless at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. “Muli na naman akong mawawalay kay Anselmo.” (I was separated once more from Anselmo.) The only thing she could do at that time was cry out to Donya Ariana. “Mama, tama na yan! Anselmo! Anong ginagawa nyo? Bitiwan nyo ako.” Donya Ariana laughed like a domineering sadist at the sight of Anselmo beaten to a pulp. She then taunted Nidora.“Ano? Makikipagkita ka pa ba kay Anselmo?” (What now? Will you still go with Anselmo?)

Nidora tried to talk some sense into her mother again at the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode. ”Mama, mabuti naman po ang nais ni Anselmo. Bitiwan nyo nga ako.” (Anselmo’s intentions are good. Will you let me go?) Donya Ariana then told her men. ”Wag nyong bibitiwan.” (Don’t let her go.) Once the men are done with Anselmo, they threw him out of the gate. Anselmo was too weak to get up and enter the gate in time. The ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode ended with Anselmo locked out of the mansion.

Everyone knew how Nidora did not end up with Anselmo. But how many times did they fail before the battle was lost? Tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode replay.

The black-and-white edition of the KalyeSerye proved to be a promising tweak to the ALDUB dynamic. [You can also view the YouTube version of the ALDUB Lihim Ng Kahapon episode replay as attached.] It was as if everything was fresh again. But how prepared is the audience for a sad ending? More analytical episode recaps to come. So might as well like our official Facebook page, The Philippines Web. And follow us on Twitter @pinasamazing. We’d be expecting you.

ALDUB 2nd Condition: ANSERA Volume 1

[ALDUB 2nd Condition Featured Image from Eat Bulaga Facebook Page.] As of the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. Lola Nidora still hasn’t gotten over Anselmo. It was a stark contrast to the cheery disposition that Donya Tinidora exuded. In fact, Donya Tinidora was practicing with some random Cuando Cuando Cuando. “Hay naku! Kung ikaw ang pakakasalan ko, hindi ka marunong sumayaw!” (Oh dear! If I will marry you, you don’t even know how to dance!) They decided on renting gowns made for the Vic-Pauleen wedding after the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode.

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora was then asked by Lola Nidora where was Donya Tidora. “Iniwan ko muna kay Barbara at nahihilo na ako sa amoy naptalina dun.” (I left her with Barbara [Sastre] for the meantime and the smell of naphthaline gets me dizzy.) Later, Divina entered the frame while singing a few lines from Sam Smith’s track “Stay With Me”. Bossing Vic ended up commenting. “May hangover pa ito nung Sabado.” (She’s still reeling from the Saturday episode.)

Donya Tinidora chided Divina at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Ikaw! Kinikilig ka na naman, hija, ha?” (You are getting too giddy again, dear, huh?) As usual, Lola Nidora is worried again. “Iniisip lang naman kita, Divina.” (I am just worried about you.) Later, Alden appeared on the other monitor DUBsmashing the same track. “Won’t you stay with me? Coz you’re all I need. Love is clear to see. But, darling, stay with me.”

A few minutes afterwards at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. Alden and Divina alternately DUBsmashed the same lyrics from Christina Perri’s “A Thousand Years”. “I have died everyday waiting for you. Darling, don’t be afraid. I have loved you for a thousand years.” Donya Tinidora found it impressive. “Aba! Sumasagot ha?” (You’re replying each other’s lines, huh?) Bossing Vic then suggested. “Sasabay na kayo ni Alden?” (Are you coming along with us [to get married]?) Alden was quick to reply. “Hindi po.” (No, sir.) But he can’t help but DUBsmash a line from Train’s “Marry Me”. “Marry me. Today and everyday.” He had to stop before earning the ire of Lola Nidora.

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

When asked if she already found a gown to wear at the wedding. Divina thought of wearing the same gown she wore at the aborted wedding with Frankie. Lola Nidora suggested against it at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Divina, hindi ikaw ang ikakasal. Baka mapagkamalan ka pa ng pari pag yun ang isinuot mo.” (You’re not the one getting married. The priest might even mistake you [for a bride] because of your gown.)

Lola Nidora then remembered the ALDUB 2nd Condition that Alden had to fulfill. So she asked Divina. “Divina, ano yung pangalawa?” (What’s the second [condition]?) Divina forego the second condition for the meantime. “Next time na po, lola.” She hasn’t thought about it. So Donya Tinidora gave a suggestion at the ALDUB 2nd Condition. “Pahirapan mo si Alden. Patugtugin mo ng musical instrument.” (Make it hard for Alden. Make him play a musical instrument.) Everyone had to remind her that the first condition was already done at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode.

In a little while, Divina handed Lola Nidora her diary. Lola Nidora almost scolded her grand-niece for having the diary. Divina then diverted the topic to Lola Nidora’s diary. “Baka puede nyo na pong ikwento si Anselmo.” (Maybe you can share your story about Anselmo.) Lola Nidora agreed at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Sige. Ikukwento ko na lahat. Makinig kayong mabuti sa kwento ko para patuloy kayong maging matatag.” (Okay. I will tell you everything. Listen carefully to my story so that you will continuously be strong.)

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora opened the diary on the entry dated 25 January 1945. [ALDUB 2nd Condition episode flashback features Paolo Ballesteros as Mama. Camera switches to black and white mode.] “Hoy, Pedring! Hindi pa ba tapos itong awto? Kanina pa yan! Bakit yan pa kasi ginamit mo? Ang dami-dami nating kotse! Pag nalaman kong nagkita sina Nidora at Anselmo dahil sa yo, sisante ka!” (Pedring! Are you not done yet repairing the automobile? It’s been forever. Why did you even use this? Of all the cars that we own! If I learned that Nidora and Anselmo met because of you, you’re fired!)

Lola Nidora feared her mother. Ariana Miley Zobeyala. “Matapobre si Mama. Ayaw niya kay Anselmo. Dahil siya ay mahirap.” (Mama is snooty. She hates Anselmo. Because he is poor.) [ALDUB 2nd Condition episode flashback shows Anselmo played by Alden Richards. He wore a camisa de chino and trousers that extended beyond the knees.] Boss Joey de Leon can’t help but notice Anselmo’s hairstyle. “Superman eh. May pagka-Superman pa eh.” (Looks like Superman.)

Lola Nidora mentioned the obvious once the audience sees Anselmo. “Yun ang hindi mapigilan ni Anselmo. Kumukurap-kurap. Pag may naririnig na kanta, sinasabayan with emotions. At doon nagsimula ang DUBsmash.” (That is one mannerism that Anselmo can’t help but do. Blinking. Whenever he hears a song, he hums along. And that’s how DUBsmash started.)

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora would occasionally pause to let the events unfold at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode flashbacks. Donya Tinidora would then complain in case Lola Nidora’s pauses would lead to dead air. The KalyeSerye commentary panel can’t help but ask. “Ba’t may tiyanak?” (How come there’s a fetus monster?) Donya Tinidora’s little girl voice sounded a little like the tiyanak.

Lola Nidora recalled how harsh Ariana Miley was to everyone including her own children.“Mabigat ang kamay ni Mama.” (Mama dealt with a heavy hand.) As Ariana Miley scolded the driver, she thought of Nidora. “Bilisan mo diyan at susunduin pa natin si Nidora. Baka maunahan tayo ni Anselmo.” (Hurry up and we have to fetch Nidora. Anselmo might arrive ahead of us.) [ALDUB 2nd Condition episode flashback features Maine Mendoza as the young Nidora.]

The KalyeSerye commentary panel noticed a double heart image at the background where the young Nidora walked. An obvious loophole to what could have been a period angel of the KalyeSerye.“May mga Mama Mary na pala sa Aurora.” (So there’s a Mama Mary image [Sacred Heart of Jesus and Immaculate Heart of Mary] at Aurora then.) [Good thing, Wally Bayola and Jose Manalo tried to stay in character despite the minor quibbles. It’s live anyway. And it’s improv so anything goes in the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode.]

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora recalled the erratic manner that she walked in looking for Anselmo.“Lakad na mabilis. Nagwo-walling. Alalang alala ako kay Anselmo habang naglalakad.” (I walked fast. I leaned to the wall. I was so worried of Anselmo while walking.) Allan K had to mention the obvious at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Ang ganda mo pala nung bata ka. Anyareh?” (You were beautiful when you were young. What happened?)

Lola Nidora kept with her story as if she didn’t hear Allan K at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Mukhang naligaw ako. Alalang alala ako. Tumitingin ako sa kanan, sa kaliwa, sa baba, sa taas. Mataas na ang araw. Alalang alala ako kay Anselmo habang hawak ko ang larawan hanggang nakita ko paparating na si Mama. Tumakas ako at nakitago sa isang bahay.” (It looks like I’m lost. I was so worried. I looked to the left, to the right, below, above. The sun is up. I am so worried of Anselmo as I held his picture until I saw Mama. I scampered and hid in a house.)

The young Nidora asked to be taken in temporarily in fear of her mother. Too late. Ariana Miley has seen her. She made a scene at the gate.“Hoy! Nidora! Ilabas nyo si Nidora!” (Let Nidora out!) Nidora sat beside the gate as the house’s owners didn’t interfere. Ariana Miley was yelling outside the gate. “Pag nakita kita, ikukulong kita sa mansion. Hindi mo na makikita si Anselmo. Nasan ang pamalo ko?” (If I catch you, you’re grounded at the mansion. You will never see Anselmo. Where’s my stick?) She picked up a random stick to discipline Nidora at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode.

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora related the fear that lingered above her head. “Napaupo ako at umiiyak sa takot. Galit na galit si Mama.” (I sat and cried in fear. Mama was furious.) Ariana Miley acted like some random erratic matron with a big mouth outside the gate. “Nidora! Labas! Labas! Lumabas ka diyan! Nagwawala ako!” (Out! Out! Get out! I just snapped!) [The moment Ariana Miley said “Nagwawala ako!” is where the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode enters parody territory. And it helped in the consistency in the KalyeSerye overall theme.]

Lola Nidora teared up again at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Tinidora, masakit pa rin pala. Kala ko nakalimutan ko na. Parang naninikip ang dibdib ko. Mag-Sugod Bahay muna tayo.” (It still hurt after all this time. I thought I have forgotten about it. I feel my chest tighten. Let’s go to the Sugod Bahay errand for the meantime.) Donya Tinidora is a little upset. But she then relented. Lola Nidora had to ask Donya Tinidora. “Bakit naging ganyan ang boses mo?” (Why did your voice sounded like that?)

Boss Joey then suggested. “Gusto kong makita anong hitsura ni Tinidora noong dalaga pa.” (I’d like to know how does Tinidora look like when she was young.) Donya Tinidora replied at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. “Kamukha ni Chiquito.” (Looks like [the late comedian] Chiquito.) On why Donya Tinidora is clueless about their mother’s strictness was explained in the ALDUB Love on Top episode. Lola Nidora stayed mostly with Ariana Miley while Donya Tidora and Donya Tinidora were educated abroad.

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora suggested that her relationship with Anselmo has been going on behind her mother’s back. Prior to the attempted meet-up shown at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. Nidora has set expectations for Anselmo. “Pag di tayo nagkita sa araw na yun, dahil takot na takot ako kay Mama.” (In case we did not meet that day, it’s because I feared Mama so much.) Lola Nidora implied that Anselmo still waited despite the risk. “Iginuhit niya ang aking mukha habang siya’y naghihintay.” (He sketched my face while waiting for me.)

Lola Nidora directed her story back to her mother, Ariana Miley. “Hindi nagpatalo ang Mama. Nakita ako ni Mama.” (Mama refused to back down. And she saw me.) The gate wasn’t closed enough. So she got to open it. Upon seeing Nidora, she dragged her out of the house where she hid. Lola Nidora recalled the cruelty under her mother at the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode.

“Halos ayoko nang mabuhay nang ako ay saktan niya. Sabunot, sampal ang inabot ko sa kanya. Malupit ang Mama. Kinaladkad ako. Pinahiya ako. Napaupo ako kahit mainit na mainit ang panahon.” (I almost lost the will to live when she hurt me. She pulled my hair and slapped me. Mama was cruel. She dragged me out. She shamed me. I sat on the concrete despite the hot weather.)

ALDUB 2nd Condition
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora was just about to learn defiance at this point. She had enough of the physical and psychological pain and stood up. She ran away from her mother and called for Anselmo’s name. Anselmo sensed something wrong and ended up running from his spot too. The ALDUB 2nd Condition episode ended with Anselmo and Nidora looking for each other.

The ANSERA Saga was an interesting tweak to the KalyeSerye as presented in the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode. What else did we miss the first time that it was aired? For now, tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB 2nd Condition episode replay.

After ANSERA Volume 1 was unleashed, netizens were abuzz with what could be the next installment in the flashback edition. Boss Joey de Leon already suggested Donya Tinidora’s backstory. But how many stories are found in Lola Nidora’s diary? There would be more episode recaps that would try to pry on that. For now, follow us on our social media accounts. Like our official Facebook page, The Philippines Web. And follow us on Twitter @pinasamazing. We’d be expecting you.

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding: Ukulele and Keyboard

The ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode opened in a store nearby the Broadway Centrum. Donya Tinidora felt somewhat bored. “Ano ba? Kanina pa tayo dito. Anong gagawin natin?” (What now? We’ve been here since awhile ago. What are we doing here?) Donya Tidora then reminded them of the gift. “Halika na kasi. Bumili na tayo ng regalo para sa bridal shower.” (Come on. Let’s buy a gift for the bridal shower.) Donya Tinidora was checking the lanes too. “O di ba? Dun ang daan natin dapat?” (Isn’t it? Shouldn’t we be going that route instead.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Divina accompanied Lola Nidora as always.“Dito po muna tayo, lola.” (Let’s stay here, granny.) Donya Tinidora, being a spinster, doesn’t get the logic of a bridal shower. That or it’s her sarcasm getting the better of her again at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Alam mo kasi, ate, bakit may pa-bridal-bridal shower pa? Ano yan? Hindi naliligo?” (You know, elder sister, why the fuss on this bridal shower thingy? What’s that? They don’t shower?)

Lola Nidora explained what a bridal shower is. She’s the only one among the triplets that got married anyway. “Hindi. Alam mo binibigay ito sa huling araw na dalaga pa ang isang babae. Katuwaan at parang despedida de soltera. Si Pauleen, isang linggo na lang, misis na siya.” (No. You know that this is the event commemorating the last day that a woman will be single. Just for fun like a despedida de soltera. Pauleen will be a wife in a week.) For the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Donya Tidora learned of the theme for the bridal shower. Hence an idea on what gift to buy. “Alam ko na yung nagsisimula sa letter B para Bossing.” (I know that we should buy an item that starts with the letter B for Bossing.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora’s quick wit activated. ”Ah sige. May tinda kayong balot?” (Okay then. [Asks a shopkeeper.] Do you have some balot?) Lola Nidora suggested against buying it at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Balot? Wag yun. Bakya.” (Not that. Go with “bakya” [wooden clogs].) Donya Tidora went into brainstorming mode. “Ayan! May tindang bayong sa tindahan ng sapatos.” (There! A “bayong” in a shoe store!)

Lola Nidora spotted some items too. “Boots. Ayan, may boots.” Donya Tinidora saw another item that starts with a letter B. “Eto, bangko.” (Here’s a bench [not shown on cam].) Donya Tidora saw someone with a description that starts with a letter B at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ayun, si ate. Bungi.” (There’s a lady with some tooth gaps.)

A few minutes into checking the wares. Lola Nidora found herself tearing up again. Donya Tinidora easily saw it at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding “Oh yan! May naalala ka na naman, ate. Naiiyak ka na naman” (There! You remembered something again. You teared up again.) Lola Nidora was slightly in denial though. “Hindi. Alam mo naman kasi na naaalala ko lang. Ang sakit sakit.” (No. You know that I only remembered something. It hurt so much.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tidora was nicer in chastising Lola Nidora. ”Ate, ikaw lang eh. Kahapon pa kami saway nang saway sa yo eh. Wag ka ngang mag-inarts diyan.” (Elder sister, it’s just you anyway. We’ve been scolding you since yesterday. Stop the drama.) Donya Tinidora has less and less patience for their elder sister. “Dapat di ka na lang sumama.” (You shouldn’ve have gone with us.) Lola Nidora found a convenient excuse though at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Hindi. Kasi papano kung si Divina yung ikakasal? Divina, baka iwanan mo na kami.” (No. What if it’s Divina’s turn to get married? Divina, you might leave us upon getting married.)

It was that point in the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode where Donya Tinidora agreed. “Oo nga. Naku! Siguradong magiging nobyo niya yan. At siempre dun din mapupunta yan sa kasalan.” (Yes. Oh my! Chances are he’d be her boyfriend eventually. Then it leads to a wedding.) Divina consoled Lola Nidora away from these thoughts. “Lola, hindi pa po mangyayari yun. Bata pa po kami ni Alden. Saka marami pa po kaming plano. Saka, lola, kahit ano naman pong mangyari, kahit ikasal ako sa future, hindi ko naman po kayo iiwan.” (Granny, it won’t happen yet. We of Alden are still young. And we still have a lot of plans in life. And, granny, whatever happens, even if I get married in the future, I won’t leave you.)

Lola Nidora was thankful. She then tried to change the topic. “Salamat, Divina. Oo nga pala. Kumusta si Alden? Makakatugtog ba yun ngayon?” (Thanks, Divina. By the way. How is Alden? Can he play now?) Divina wasn’t so sure of Alden’s performance at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Yun nga po. Hindi ko pa nga po alam eh.” (That’s the point. I don’t know myself.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tinidora has faith in Alden. “Naku, basta ako, I’m pretty. I’m pretty sure si Alden, kayang kaya niya yan mamaya. Halika na. Mamili na tayo.” (I’m pretty sure that Alden can handle himself later. Let’s go. Let’s shop.) As everyone continued shopping. Donya Tidora wondered aloud at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ano kaya tutugtugin ni Alden? Naalala ko tuloy mga theme song nung panahon ko. Baby, baby, baby oh!” (What will Alden play? I suddenly remembered the songs of my childhood.)

What the grannies bought for the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode weren’t shown immediately. But the groom himself and center of the bachelor’s party, Bossing Vic Sotto, later saw Lola Nidora. “Ayun pala sila oh. Nasa gazebo. Parang malungkot pa rin si Lola.” (There they are at the gazebo. Looks like Granny is still sad.) He, Boss Joey de Leon and Senator Tito Sotto immediately assumed that Lola Nidora is with her immediate family. Senator Tito saw Lola Nidora with her beloved diary. “Yung diary, dala eh. Nagbukas ng isang page kahapon yan eh.” (She has the diary. She already opened a page yesterday.)

Donya Tidora happily entered the frame with Donya Tinidora at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ate! Excited na ko talaga, mga sister. Damang dama ko ang pag-ibig.” (Elder sister! I’m so excited, sisters. I could feel the love.) Lola Nidora wasn’t in a celebratory mood. “Umayos kayo! Wag kayong magulo!” (Mind your manners! Don’t be so chirpy.) Donya Tinidora snapped back at Lola Nidora. “Maayos kami ha?” (We mind our manners, okay?)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Donya Tidora wasn’t as bitchy as Donya Tinidora though. “Ano ka ba naman, ate? Busy ka pa rin sa diary mo? May paiyak iyak ka pa. Kahapon binuksan mo na yan. Hindi mo naman kinwento sa amin kung ano ang nakasulat.” (What gives, elder sister? You’re still busy with your diary? You’re even crying on the side. You already opened that yesterday. But you didn’t share us what’s written.) Lola Nidora finally mentioned a name at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding Episode. “Naalala ko lang si Anselmo. Bakit? Masama ba?” (I just remembered Anselmo. Why? Is that a bad thing?)

Donya Tinidora wouldn’t tolerate Lola Nidora’s dramatics at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Bakit kasi kung kelan ka nagkaganyan, ate? Masyado kang BV. Bad vibes ka. Nakita mo, ang saya saya ng mga tao tapos ikaw, iyak ka nang iyak diyan?” (Why are you acting up at this point? You produce so much BV. [Lola Nidora asks what BV meant.] You’re producing bad vibes. You see how happy everyone is here while you, you’re crying.) Donya Tidora agreed. “Oo nga.” (Yes indeed.)

Donya Tinidora continued. “Ikaw ba ang magulang ng ikakasal?” (Are you the parents of people about to be married?) Donya Tidora added. “Tigilan mo na nga yang pagdadrama mo diyan, ate?” (Stop your drama, elder sister.) Lola Nidora caved in upon feeling outnumbered. “E di titigilan.” (Then I will stop.) Donya Tinidora tried to recompose herself at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Iyakin. Konting ano, iiyak?” (Such a cry baby. Over something frivolous.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Divina shortly arrived with Alden. “Lola.” (Granny.) Donya Tidora almost didn’t hear Divina at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. She was busy pulling the Lola Nidora standee. “Pag di ka tumigil, ito isasama namin.” (If you didn’t stop, we’d take this [Lola Nidora] instead [to the wedding].) Lola Nidora pretended not to hear Donya Tidora. “San ba kayo nanggaling?” (Where have you been?) Divina explained. “Galing po kaming mall, lola. Nagpasama po ako kay Alden. Kasi may pinagawa lang po ako para sa regalo ko po mamaya.” (We were from the mall, granny. I asked Alden to accompany me. I had something done for my gift later.)

Alden noticed the sadness that Lola Nidora still harbored. “Opo. Wag na po kayong malungkot, lola. Kahapon pa po kayo ganyan eh.” (Yes. Please don’t be sad, granny. You’ve been sad since yesterday.) Lola Nidora downplayed her sadness at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Salamat at nandito kayo. Ready na ba kayo sa pupuntahan nating bridal shower at bachelor’s party?” (Thank goodness and you’re here. Are you ready for the bridal shower and bachelor’s party.) Divina replied. “Ready na po. Wag na po kayong malungkot.” (We’re ready. Please don’t be sad.)

Donya Tidora played with the Lola Nidora standee complete with impersonations. “Hoy! Apo!” Alden and Divina found it funny. Then she switched back as herself at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Eh kasi itong si ate eh. Ngayong may ikakasal. Pakiramdam ko pati ako mai-in love.” (That’s the problem with elder sister. Now that someone is getting married. I feel like falling in love too.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Divina then wondered aloud. “Masaya po siguro ikasal ano, lola?” (It looked fun to get married, isn’t it, granny?) Alden added. “Yun nga siguro yung pinakamasayang araw. Para sa dalawang taong nagmamahalan.” (That may be the happiest day. For 2 people in love.) Donya Tinidora agreed. “Yan! Tama. Eh kayong dalawa? Kelan nyo gustong ikasal?” (Correct. How about you? When would you like to get married?) Alden had a ready answer at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ako po, sa lalong madaling panahon. Agad agad po.” (For me, the soonest time possible. Immediately.)

Lola Nidora heard what Alden said at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ano?” (Come again?) Alden backtracked. “Joke lang po, lola.” (Just kidding, granny.) Donya Tinidora pressed for more info. “Naku, Alden! Yung totoo? Kelan mo gustong ikasal?” (Really? When would you like to be wed?) Alden thought about it at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ako po siguro, pag 29.” (Maybe once I hit 29 years old.) Donya Tinidora had a follow up question. “Ilang taon ka na ngayon?” (How old are you now?) Alden answered. “24 po.”

Donya Tinidora found it easy to calculate. “24. Limang taon na lang. Malapit na ha? Buhay pa kaya yung lola nyong yan? Ikaw, Yaya? Kelan mo gustong ikasal?” (5 years to go. It’s only a few years short. Would your granny still be alive by that time. How about you, nanny? When would you like to be wed?) Divina had a calculated answer too at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Siguro po mga 5 years from now.” (Maybe 5 years from now.) Donya Tinidora quickly got the drift. “Aba, pareho ha?” (Almost the same.) Alden then DUBsmashed Train’s “Marry Me” to Divina.

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Soon it was Donya Tidora’s turn to ask at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Eh saan nyo naman gustong ikasal? Sa church, sa beach, sa garden o sa gazebo?” (Now where would you like to be wed?) Divina thought about it fast enough. “Ako po, lola, pag kinasal, gusto ko po sa simbahan. Kasi iba pa rin po pag nasa harap ng altar eh.” (As for me, granny, I’d like it to be in church. It’s still different when you’re in front of the altar.)

Alden agreed. “Ako rin po. Kasi pag sa simbahan. Siempre iba pa rin po talaga pag yung dalawang nagmamahalan, na-seal yung pagmamahalan sa harap ng Dios. Iba pa rin po yung ganung pakiramdam.” (Me too. Because at church. It’s still different when 2 people in love has their relationship sealed in front of God. That feeling is still better.) Alden then DUBsmashed 98 Degrees’ “I Do (Cherish You)” at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode.

While the wedding talk is still going on at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Donya Tinidora kept the momentum running. “Ninong? Ninong?” (Godfathers [in mind]?) Donya Tidora completed the question at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Sino magiging mga ninong at ninang?” (Who will be the principal sponsors?) Divina enumerated the first names “Puede po si Bossing po. Boss Joey. Tito Sen.” (Bossing Vic Sotto. Boss Joey de Leon. Senator Tito Sotto.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden made sure to mention their Eat Bulaga family. “Mga dabarkads po.” Divina included even the backstage crew and the Kalye’s Angels’ alter egos too. “Ma’am Jenny, Kuya Pao, Kuya Jose, Kuya Wally.” Donya Tinidora was pleased. “Siempre. Ganyan talaga ang mga kasalan. Kailangan natin yan.” (Of course. That’s how weddings go. We need those.) Bossing Vic then suggested. “Ba’t di pa kayo sumabay?” (Why not get wed alongside us?) Before Alden could answer, he saw Lola Nidora’s reaction at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Lola?” (Granny?)

Bossing Vic then backtracked. “Lola, lola, joke lang. Joke lang.” (Granny, just kidding. Just kidding.) Donya Tinidora continued with the questions despite Lola Nidora’s unsavory reactions at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ano theme song nyo? Kung saka-sakaling ikakasal kayo, ano theme song nyo? Bawal yung God Gave Me You.” (What will be your theme song? Except God Gave Me You.) Alden beat Donya Tinidora to mentioning more exceptions at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. He quickly DUBsmashed “Thinking Out Loud” by Ed Sheeran. Donya Tinidora could only scratch her head. “Naku! Na-DALINAY tayo.”

Lola Nidora broke her silence at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Alam nyo, kanina ko pa kayo pinakikinggan. Ano itong usapan na ito? Wedding plans? Ha? Alam nyo, kinakabahan ako sa usapan. Drop the topic.” (You know, I’ve been listening to you since awhile ago. What discussion is this? Wedding plans? Huh? The discussion gets me nervous. Drop the topic.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Divina then changed the topic as requested by Lola Nidora. “Oo nga pala, Alden. Kamusta na yung pagpe-play mo ng instrument? Kaya mo na ba?” (By the way, Alden. How is your instrument practice? Can you do it?) Alden assured Divina that he can. “Ay oo. Tsinaga ko talaga. Promise.” (Yes of course. I really strived for it.) Divina needed assurance for the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode’s performance later. “Kaya mo nang tumugtog mamaya?” (Can you play later?) Alden replied in the affirmative.“Oo. Mamaya.” (Yes, Later.)

Donya Tinidora supported Alden for his ALDUB EB Pre Wedding performance. “Galingan mo, hijo.” (Do it good, son.) Alden hoped for the best. “Sana po ma-impress kayo.” (I hope you’d be impressed.) Lola Nidora took Alden’s word at face value. “Sige. Sige. Tingnan natin kung magagawa mo yung unang condition.” (Okay. Okay. Let’s see if you can do the first condition.

The phone rung loud enough for everyone to hear at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Divina knew it’s Lola Nidora’s phone. “Lola, may tumatawag po ata sa inyo.” (Granny, you have a call.) Alden thought it’s Divina’s phone. “Parang phone mo.” (Seems like it’s your phone.) Senator Tito sounded a little irritated. “Ba’t di mo i-silent yan?” (Why don’t you put it on silent mode?)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora found her phone in her bag. “Hello? [Pabebe tongue] Ah, for awhile.” Donya Tinidora was sarcastic again. “Hulaan ko. Si Alden yan.” (Let me guess. It’s Alden.) Alden spoke instead. “Andito ako, lola.” (I’m here, granny.) Divina then talked on the phone. “Yes, Jake. Hello, Jake? Teka lang. Choppy ka, choppy ka. Mahina siguro yung signal. Baka nasa beach.” (Your line is choppy. The signal must have been weak.) The line was cut.

Alden looked jealous again at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Alden was quick to ask. “Beach. Pano mo nalamang nasa beach?” (How did you know he’s at the beach.) Divina answered. “Nakita ko sa Instagram niya. Nag-upload kahapon.” (I saw on his Instagram. He uploaded [photos] yesterday.) It got Alden suspicious at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Fina-follow mo?” (You follow him?) Divina had a harmless alibi. “Eh finallow ako eh. Finallowback ko. Ganun.” (He followed me. I followed him back. That’s how.)

Alden’s voice sounded more irritated than angry though. “Bakit ba tumatawag siya? Di ba parang … Akala ko ba iniwan na niya yung mga project sa iyo.” (Why does he call you? Isn’t it … I thought he has left the project to you.) Divina just thought of Jake as a micro-manager as of the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Brainchild kasi niya yung project namin sa marketing. Kaya siempre, kailangan niyang tumawag para manghingi ng updates. Hello?” (Our marketing project is his brainchild. So of course, he had to call for updates.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

It’s unusual for Alden to be upset as seen at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Updates. Iniwan na nga. Nagpunta na nga ng Singapore. Kelangan pa ba niyang tumawag?” (He already left [the project]. He already went to Singapore. Does he really have to call?) Divina thought of Jake’s calls as harmless. “Sabi ko nga di ba? Baka naho-homesick yung tao.” (Like I said, right? He might just be homesick.)

Alden’s gut feel about Jake’s selective homesickness escalated. But he didn’t raise his voice at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Puede namang iba yung tawagan pag naho-homesick. Bakit ikaw?” (He can call someone else if he’s homesick. Why you?) Divina didn’t pretend that she knew. “Eh hindi ko rin alam.” (I don’t know either.) Donya Tidora suggested aloud. “Puede namang ako.” (It can be me [that he call instead].)

Divina had to ask Alden. “Bakit nagseselos ka?” (Why are you jealous?) Alden raised his voice at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode before he even realized it. “HINDI AKO NAGSESELOS!” (I’m not jealous!) Divina pretended not to hear Alden. “Bakit nga nagseselos ka? Oy, selos ka! Selos si Tisoy!” (Why are you jealous? You’re jealous. Tisoy is jealous!)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden repeated what he said. But this time, with a calmer disposition. “Hindi ako nagseselos.” (I’m not jealous.) Divina then tried to make Alden smile at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Smile ka na.” (Smile now.) Alden tried to smile. “Hindi ako nagseselos. Promise.” (I’m not jealous. I promise.) Divina egged him on. “Uy! Parang pamilyar sa kin yan. Parang napanood ko na yan ah. Seloso. Wag ka nang magselos! Ito naman. School naman ang pinag-uusapan namin.” (That face is familiar. I’ve seen this before. Jealous guy. Don’t be jealous! Come on. We’re talking about school.)Alden’s next words sounded exasperated. “School. School. Kahapon ka pa.” (Been like that since yesterday.)

Lola Nidora had to butt in. “Nagsisigawan ba kayo?” (Are you yelling at each other?) Alden and Divina said no. Still, Alden couldn’t let it go even at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Alam mo? Nakakahalata na ko kay Jake eh. Nakakahalata na ko.” (You know what? I’m starting to sense something else about Jake. It’s getting obvious.) Divina still took Alden’s behavior lightly though. “Bakit ba nagseselos ka? Ano ba?” (Why are you jealous? What the heck?)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden insisted that he’s not jealous. “Hindi ako nagseselos. Hindi ako nagseselos.” (I’m not jealous. I’m not jealous.) Divina had to talk to Alden further. “Wag ka na ngang magselos. Classmate ko lang naman. At saka may girlfriend na yung tao. Bayaan mo, pagdating ni Jake, ipapakilala kita sa kanya. Para magkakilala na kayo.” (Stop getting jealous. He’s just my classmate. And he already had a girlfriend. Once Jake comes, I’d introduce you to him. So that you’d know each other better.)

Lola Nidora had to interfere again. [Donya Tidora and Donya Tinidora encountered audio problems hence the difficulty in butting in.] “Tama na ang ganyang tampuhan. Hindi maganda yan.” (Stop the squabble. It’s not lovely.) Alden apologized. “Sorry po, lola.” (I’m sorry, granny.) Divina apologized at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode too. “Sorry po. Lola, puede ko na po pala kunin yung regalo ko?” (I’m sorry. Granny, may I fetch my gift now?) Alden seconded the motion. “Sige po. Balikan lang po namin, lola. Samahan ko lang po si Yaya.” (Yes. We would just return to it.) Lola Nidora then allowed them to go. “Sige. Sige. Mag-ingat kayong dalawa.” (Okay. Okay. Careful on your way.)

Feedback blasts from the speaker at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. The speaker is in front of Donya Tidora and Donya Tinidora. Donya Tinidora had a mini-heart attack and mini-seizure. Lola Nidora had to check on her. “Ano nangyari sa yo, Tinidora?” (What happened to you?) Donya Tinidora was almost dumbfounded. “Ano ba kasalanan ko?” (What wrong have I done?) Donya Tidora recovered better than Donya Tinidora.

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Bossing Vic then saw the sisters exit the gazebo area. “San ba kayo pupunta?” (Where are you going?) Donya Tinidora replied. “Pupunta kami diyan sa inyo.” Bossing asked. “Bakit?” (Why?) Donya Tinidora replied at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Sugod Broadway.” (For the Sugod Broadway errand.) Donya Tidora emphasized Donya Tinidora’s reply. “Sugod studio.” (We’d attack the studio.) Donya Tinidora stopped by some flowers first. “Mabuti pa siguro diligan ko muna itong mga bulaklak.” (I better sprinkle on these flowers first.) Donya Tidora then realized that Donya Tinidora is trying to take a leak. “Bawal diyan.” (It’s not allowed there.)

Lola Nidora mentioned her concern for Alden and Divina. “Alam nyo yung dalawa parang nagkakatampuhan. Di nyo man lang sawayin.” (The two seems like they’re having a quarrel. And you didn’t even interfere.) Donya Tinidora downplayed the LQ seen at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Hindi naman sila nagaaway. Tampuhan lang yun.” (That’s not a quarrel. Just a minor blip.) Bossing Vic didn’t like the calls either. “Kasi naman, tawag nang tawag yung isa eh.” (Because one keeps on calling.)

Lola Nidora contemplated on a solution. “Ano kaya kung i-block ko na rito sa telepono si Jake?” (What if I just block Jake on my phone?) Bossing Vic found the calls grating too. “Wala naman sa timing yung tawag eh.” (His calls are ill-timed.) Donya Tinidora pondered on the timing of the calls too. “Puede namang tumawag off the air. Bakit on the air pa tumatawag?” (He can call off the air. Why does he have to call on air?)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Bossing Vic agreed. “Oo nga.” (Correct.) Donya Tidora had other plans at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ba’t di nyo na lang kasi ibigay ang number ko?” (Why not give my number instead?) Senator Tito agreed with Lola Nidora’s suggestion. “Tama. I-block mo.” (Right. Block him.) Bossing Vic quickly greeted the grannies upon seeing them. “Hi, Lola.”

Lola Nidora had another phone call after the Sugod Broadway segment at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Alden! Divina! Nasan ba kayo? Tapos na kaming mamigay ng regalo dito.” (Where are you? We’re done distributing prizes here.) Divina replied. “Sige po. Pupunta na po kami diyan, Lola.” (Okay. We’re on our way, granny.) Lola Nidora egged them to hurry up. “Halina kayo rito.” (Come over here.) Alden vouched for Divina. “Sige po, Lola. Ako na po ang bahala.” (Okay, granny. I’d handle this.)

Bossing Vic had to verify. “San ba sila nanggaling?” (Where have they been?) Lola Nidora replied to Bossing Vic. “Sa mall.” Now that they have returned to the Broadway Centrum for the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding performane. Alden asked Divina. “Ready ka na ba?” (Are you ready?) Divina is set. “Yeah, I’m okay. Good luck sa performance mo.” Lola Nidora herself is agitated. “Bilisan nyo na.” (Hurry up.) Alden had to assist Divina first. “Takpan ko muna mata mo ha?” (I’d cover your eyes first.) Divina’s eyes got covered real well. “Uy, teka. Wala talaga akong nakikita.” Alden covered Divina’s eyes with his right hand around her shoulder. Lola Nidora wished Alden good luck. “Ikaw na ang bahala, Alden. Good luck.”

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

A violin playing Thousand Years was heard in the background of the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Donya Tinidora was half-singing, half-humming to the tune. Boss Joey had to ask. “Wala bang lyrics ito?” (Doesn’t it have any lyrics?) Senator Tito himself was sarcastic. “Ang linaw ha?” (The lyrics are so clear.) Alden stopped and uncovered Divina’s eyes. “Op, wait lang. Papatunayan ko na sa yo na seryoso talaga ako. Ready?” (Please wait. I will prove to you that I am serious.) Divina sits down.

Alden started with a little disclaimer. “Inaral ko talaga to ha?” (I really studied this well.) Alden plays “Thinking Out Loud” while the Spogify Finalists sing in the background. Behind Alden at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode are 3 ukulele players. They included Alden’s ukulele mentor, Pat. Divina liked Alden’s performance. “Alam mo, ang galing mo. Seryoso. Ang galing mo.” (You know, you’re great. Seriously. You’re great.)

Alden then revealed at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Teka. Hindi pa ko tapos.” (Wait. I’m not yet done.) Divina asked him. “Ano na naman?” (What is it this time?) Alden admitted to Divina the kind of practice he inputted “Hindi lang ukulele ang inaral ko. Meron pa. But wait. There’s more. Double trouble po, lola.” (I learned not only the ukulele.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden sat in front of the keyboard beside a K-hon player and a couple of cellists. Spogify Finalists accompanied Alden as he played the keyboard to the tune of Sam Smith’s “Stay With Me”. Donya Tinidora was humming at the background loud enough for Bossing Vic to sing along too. Both of them are a little clueless with the lyrics though. Alden took on the song’s last line in his ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Won’t you stay with me? Coz you’re all I need. Coz love is clear to see. So darling, stay with me.”

Divina was more than pleased at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Grabe ha? Hindi ako na-orient dito sa piano.” (Damn! I wasn’t oriented about the keyboard part.) Donya Tinidora then exclaimed. “Sasagutin na yan.” (She will say yes.) Bossing Vic was game to chant along. “Sasagutin na yan.” Donya Tidora was positive about a yes. “Oo na yan.” Bossing Vic repeated his offer to Alden and Divina. “Sabay na kayo.” (Get wed with us.) Alden, albeit nervous, asked Bossing Vic to slow down. “Relax lang, Bossing.”

Lola Nidora didn’t like the rushed behavior of her sisters. “Bakit naman sasagutin? Unang condition pa lang yan.” (Why say yes? It’s just the first condition.) Donya Tidora thought that Alden has fulfilled 2 conditions in one performance at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ate, dalawa yung pinag-aralan niya.” (Elder sister, he learned 2 instruments.) Donya Tinidora agreed. “Dalawang condition na yun.” (That makes it two conditions.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden took Lola Nidora’s side at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Hindi po. Kasi naniniwala naman ako na pag may gusto talaga, may paraan. At lahat ng paraan, posible, kapag totoo ang nararamdaman.” (No. Because I believe that if you want to, there is a way. And all ways are possible if the feelings are true.) Lola Nidora found it hard to catch up on what Alden said. “Alam mo, huli ako ng dating. Ulitin mo nga ang sinabi mo from the top.” (I was a little late. Will you repeat what you said from the top?) Alden checked if he heard Lola Nidora right. “Po?” (Pardon?)

Lola Nidora wasn’t serious though upon saying it. “Joke lang. Alden, hijo, natutuwa ako sa yo, ano? Talagang napagtiyagaan mong mag-aral ng instrumento. Napatunayan mo na ang inspirasyon ay nakakatulong upang makagawa ng mabuluhang bagay. Maganda yan.” (Just kidding. Son, I am happy about what you did, huh? You really exerted the effort to learn how to play instruments. You proved that inspiration helps to do worthwhile things. Looks good.) Alden thanked Lola Nidora for the appreciation at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Salamat po, Lola.”

Divina was pleased at the one-two punch performance that Alden prepared for the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Hindi ko talaga alam na may pa-keyboard ka pa. Alam ko yung ukulele lang. Pero alam mo ang galing mo, kaya thank you. Kasi di mo alam kung gaano ako kasaya rin. Na nagaral ka talaga para may patunayan sa kin at sa mga lola. Kaya maraming salamat.” (I really didn’t expect your keyboard stint. I only know about the ukulele. But you were great, so thank you. You have no idea how happy I am too. That you really practiced in order to prove something to me and to the grannies. So thank you very much.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Alden happily asked upon hearing Divina. “So tayo na?” (Does it mean a mutual understanding?) Donya Tidora screamed just at the thought of the at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Lola Nidora glared at Alden again. Alden clarified himself. “Tayo na kasi kanina pa tayo nakaupo.” (I meant that we should stand. Because we’ve been sitting since awhile ago.)

Alden didn’t follow any of the playing tips that Donya Tinidora taught him prior to the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. And Senator Tito was happy about it. It somewhat ruffled Donya Tinidora. She then played the keyboard and the ukulele herself. She even solicited for requests. “Ano gusto nyo?” (What do you want?) Bossing Vic then replied. “Gusto namin ng katahimikan. Ang ingay mo eh.” (We want silence. You’re so noisy.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Lola Nidora then asked Alden. “Ulitin mo nga yung tinugtog mo kanina.” (Play that tune again.) Alden sat in front of the keyboard “Teka po, naka-off.” (Wait. It’s turned off.) Donya Tidora laughed hard at the discovery. “Naka-off pala yung piano nung tumutugtog ka!” (So the keyboard was off when you were playing.) Donya Tinidora had a ready alibi at the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. “Ayoko nang maingay ang tugtog ko.” (I don’t want noise while I play.) Lola Nidora then proved that the keyboard is for real. “Para makita yung totoo.” She ended up tapping the keys close to her.

Alden sang a few lines while playing. “Won’t you stay with me?” Lola Nidora then asked Divina to accompany Alden in his ALDUB EB Pre Wedding performance. “Divina, kumanta ka nga.” (Please sing.) Donya Tidora predicted. “Album na yan.” (An album is next.) Donya Tinidora was more career options in mind. “Puede na tayong mag-concert.” (We can have a concert soon.)

ALDUB EB Pre Wedding
Source: Eat Bulaga Facebook Page

Divina’s congratulatory remarks were almost endless. “Congrats. Tapos na yung unang condition mo. Good job.” (Congratulations. Your first condition is accomplished.) Alden could only thank her so much. “Thank you.” The truck horn honked off ending the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode. Bossing Vic found the ending to be abrupt. “Yun na yun? Tapos na yung unang condition?” (That’s it? The first condition is now done?) Boss Joey had to remind him. “Isa lang yun. 2 to go pa.” (One down. 2 to go.)

What could the next condition be? Tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB EB Pre Wedding episode replay alongside the Bridal Shower for Pauleen Luna and the Bachelor’s Party for Bossing Vic Sotto.

Detailed recaps usually work especially when recalling certain events that could have impacted future episodes. Like our official Facebook page and following us on Twitter would help to keep you updated with the episode recaps found here at The Philippines Web. Who knows how many Easter eggs are hidden in plain sight? We’d be expecting your likes and retweets after following us on social media.

ALDUB Share The Love: Play Some More

[ALDUB Share The Love Featured Image from Eat Bulaga Facebook Page.] The ALDUB Share The Love episode opened with Donya Tinidora talking to Donya Tidora. She wasn’t present at the ALDUB 27th Weeksary episode. Donya Tinidora slightly blamed her for being absent on the previous episode. “Ikaw kasi. Kung saan saan kasi nagpupupunta.” (It’s your fault. You’ve been going elsewhere.) Donya Tidora summarized the reason in a way she could. “Nag-dysmenorrhea ako.” (I had dysmenorrhea.)

ALDUB Share The Love

With the first even ALDUB Library officially opened at the ALDUB 27th Weeksary episode. Donya Tidora asked Donya Tinidora. “Nung high school ka, anong ginagawa mo sa library?” (When you were in high school, what were you doing at the library?) Donya Tinidora’s answer at the ALDUB Share The Love episode was predictable. “Pag wala akong assignment, andun ako sa library.” (Whenever I don’t have any assignment, I am at the library.)

Boss Joey de Leon can’t help but ask Donya Tinidora at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Yung Xerex, binabasa mo?” (You read Xerex?) Donya Tinidora did not directly answered if she read Xerex or literature within the same genre. [Xerex, short for Xerex Xaviera, was known for Philippine erotica published at local tabloids serially.] But she hinted upon reading short stories. “Yung wakasan kasi, walang ‘Itutuloy’.” (Short stories don’t end with “To be continued”.)

To avoid going into detail regarding the stuff she read at the library. Donya Tinidora returned the question to Donya Tidora. “Nagbabasa ka rin?” (Do you read too?) Donya Tidora shared her library memories too. “Oo. At saka maraming boys. Hindi masyadong kaguwapuhan. Pero tutulungan ka sa assignment.” (Yes. And there are so many boys. They are not that handsome. But they will help you with your assignment.) Donya Tinidora got the idea that Donya Tidora hinted at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Yung iba nagliligawan sa library. Kung gusto nyong magligawan, dun kayo sa bangko. May SAFE dun.” (Other folks flirt at the library. If you want to flirt, go to the bank. There’s a SAFE there.)

ALDUB Share The Love

Lola Nidora then arrived at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Sakit ng balakang ko.” (My hip is in pain.) Donya Tidora asked. “Bakit? Malayo ba ang biyahe?” (Why? Was it a long trip?) Lola Nidora almost broke character in her reply. “Oo. Kaya di ka sumama eh.” (Yes. That’s why you didn’t come with us [to Lumban, Laguna].) Donya Tinidora supported Lola Nidora’s statement. “Ikaw kasi. Umupa ka sa matrapik.” (It’s your fault [Paolo]. You rented [an apartment] in a traffic-infested area.)

Later, both sisters noticed Lola Nidora teary-eyed again. Donya Tidora asked her elder sister. “Bakit naluluha ka na naman?” (Why are you tearing up again?) Donya Tinidora tried to lighten up the situation at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Panong di luluha yan? Sinundot mo ang mata mo.” (How will she not end up teary-eyed? You [Lola Nidora] poked your eye again.) As the Kalye’s Angels brace themselves for Bossing Vic’s wedding. Lola Nidora’s memories got her emotional again.

Donya Tinidora didn’t pretend at knowing Lola Nidora’s paid still evident at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Bakit hawak mo na naman ang diary?” (Why are you clutching to your diary again?) Lola Nidora explained. “Eh kasi may dinaluhan tayong bridal shower at saka bachelor’s party. Naalala ko mga naging bahagi ng love story ko.” (When we attended the bridal shower and the bachelor’s party. I remembered snippets of my love story.)

ALDUB Share The Love

Everyone then remembered the men Lola Nidora mentioned at the ALDUB EB Tamang Panahon special episode. The intelligent Alberto [the monitor then showed a photo of Alberto a.k.a. Wally Bayola’s face imposed on Albert Einstein’s photo]. Then Ferdinand, a fling of Lola Nidora that Donya Tidora approved of. [The monitor then showed a Wally’s face imposed on Ferdinand Magellan’s photo.] Bossing Vic can’t help but quip at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Lola, napansin ko yung mga boyfriend mo dati, kahawig mo.” (Granny, I noticed that your boyfriends looked like you.)

Then Lola Nidora mentioned Antonio at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. Boss Joey can’t keep from commenting. “Pag nakatuluyan mo si Antonio, puro mura ang aabutin mo diyan.” (If you ended up with Antonio, you’d get a lot of cuss words.) [The monitor showed Wally’s face imposed on Antonio Luna’s image.] Only one ex end up looking different. It’s Anselmo. [A B&W photo of Alden was used.]

Lola Nidora remembered Anselmo again. “Si Anselmo. Siya ang pinakatinutulan ni Mama. Siya yung the one that got away.” (Anselmo. He’s the one that Mama objected the most. He’s the one that got away.) Senator Tito then asked Lola Nidora. “Siya talaga nagustuhan mo?” (He’s the one you really liked?) Boss Joey then asked at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Tinanong mo ba siya kung nagustuhan ka niyan?” (Did you even asked him if he liked you too?) Lola Nidora said yes. “Oo naman. Crush ako niyan.” (Of course. He has a crush on me.)

ALDUB Share The Love

Remembering him made Lola Nidora cry again. Her sisters tried to comfort her at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. Donya Tinidora even mentioned Miguel, the man that Lola Nidora ended up marrying. “Ate, wag ka nang umiyak. Kaya nakilala mo si Miguel. Kundi mo siya makikilala, wala sina Dora at Duhrizz.” (Elder sister, stop crying. This is why you met Miguel. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have Dora and Duhrizz.) Bossing Vic was amazed at how almost everyone in Lola Nidora’s life had one face. “Bata, babae, lalaki. Iisa ang hulma ng mukha.” (Kids, women, men. They all have one face.)

Lola Nidora hasn’t stopped crying at the ALDUB Share The Love episode when Divina arrived with Alden. It got Divina worried. Donya Tinidora thought that Lola Nidora would repeat her relationship history from the top. But she didn’t. Lola Nidora then tried to appease Divina. “Yung ibang alaala dito sa diary ko. Kaya naiiyak ako.” (It’s some of the memories here in my diary. Hence the tears.)

Alden tried to cheer up Lola Nidora. “Lola, subukan ko po kayong tugtugan.” (Granny, let me try to cheer you up.) He then played a few of the strums he learned as of the ALDUB Share The Love episode. He already knew snippets of Sam Smith’s “Stay With Me”. It lasted, based on Alden’s estimate, 30 seconds. He also tried to play a snippet of Jason Mraz’s “I’m Yours” on his ukulele. He sung along to his ukulele too to make sure that he’s in tune with what he’s trying to play. Later he explained. “Madali lang i-memorize. Maiksi lang.” (They’re easy to memorize. Short ones.)

ALDUB Share The Love

Lola Nidora was somewhat appeased. Divina could sense at the ALDUB Share The Love though that Alden is still struggling. “Aabot ka ba? Unang condition pa lang yan.” (Can you make it [this Saturday]? It’s just the first condition.) Alden is optimistic that he can make it. “Pag magkasama tayo, lalo akong nai-inspire tumugtog.” (Whenever we are together. I get inspired to play more.)

Shortly after Alden played the ukulele. Lola Nidora’s phone rang. “Hello? Yes. For awhile.” Lola Nidora then handed the phone over to Divina. Divina then talked on the phone. “Hello? Jake. How’s Singapore?” Jake’s voice is not heard. But Divina hinted that she saw the IG photos that Jake posted. Turns out that she and Jake are already following each other on IG. Alden’s mood soured at the ALDUB Share The Love episode.

Alden’s mood was evident on Divina especially upon knowing that they still update on each other through Instagram. Divina explained. “Nangangamusta lang naman si Jake. Dapat nakilala mo si Jake.” (Jake is just asking how I am. You should meet Jake.) Albeit bitter. Alden wished that he could meet Jake too. “Sana nga po nandito ako.” (I wish I’d be here [once he returns].)

ALDUB Share The Love

Divina heard what Alden said at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Bayaan mo. Papakilala kita pagdating niya dito.” (Don’t worry. I would introduce you once he comes back.) Alden turned his attention to Jake instead in hopes that he’s watching the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Jake, respeto naman oh!” (Jake, have some damn respect!)

Lola Nidora then tried to calm Alden. “May nobya naman yung Jake. Andito naman kaming mga lola. Di ko kukunsintihin yan.” (Jake has a girlfriend anyway. We, grannies, are here anyway. We will not tolerate such behavior.) Donya Tidora pledged at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Ako ang bahala kay Jake.” (I’ll handle Jake myself.)

While Divina hasn’t said yes to Alden yet. Senator Tito commented. “Ang ke Pedro, ke Pedro.” (Whatever is due Pedro remains with Pedro.) [It’s an idiomatic expression pertaining to “ownership”.] Alden was inconsolable before the grannies went to their Sugod Bahay errand.

ALDUB Share The Love

The grannies were done with the Sugod Bahay errand at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. But Alden is still upset. Divina was consoling him. “Uy, ba’t tahimik ka pa rin? Ano? Galit ka na naman?” (Why are you still quiet? You’re mad again?) Alden downplayed his feelings. “May iniisip lang ako.” (I’m just preoccupied.)

Divina thought it’s about the practice of musical instruments. “Okay ka ba? Hindi lang naman para sa akin yun eh. Para sa yo rin. At para mapatunayan mo sa mga lola na kaya mo.” (Are you okay? This is not just for me. It’s also for your own good. And that you may prove to the grannies that you are worthy.)

Alden just let it out without looking too mad at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Kailangan ka bang tawagan?” (Does he really have to call you?) Divina addressed the elephant in the room. “Nagseselos ka?” (So you’re jealous?) Alden can’t say. He’s not yet Divina’s boyfriend as of the ALDUB Share The Love episode. Divina had to explain to the KalyeSerye commentary panel. “Nagseselos lang po kasi. Kinukumusta lang naman business namin.” (He’s just a little jealous. He [Jake] is just asking about the business.)

ALDUB Share The Love

A DUBsmash exchange ensued in an effort to diffuse the conflict between Alden and Divina. Lola Nidora was then reminded of her sweetheart. “Naalala ko tuloy si Anselmo.” (I remembered Anselmo.) Everyone then remembered the bridal shower and bachelor’s party that the Eat Bulaga crew will attend the next day. For the sake of everyone that is clueless on what a bridal shower or a bachelor’s party is. Lola Nidora explained at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Yun ang party na ibibigay sa babae at lalaki na ikakasal.” (It’s the party thrown in honor of the woman and the man about to get married.) They used the term “Bachelor’s Party” instead of “Stag Party” to indicate that it’s a wholesome event to be televised.

Divina then remembered which party they should go then. “Sa bridal shower po, puede po tayo dun. Sa bachelor’s party po, di po tayo puede dun.” (We can attend the bridal shower. We can’t attend the bachelor’s party.) Lola Nidora then gave instructions to Alden at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Ikaw ang pumunta sa bachelor’s party.” (You go to the bachelor’s party instead.)

Since Lola Nidora had been mentioning Anselmo . Donya Tidora and Donya Tinidora then asked their elder sister. “Ano ba ang laman ng diary na yan?” (What does that diary contain?) Donya Tinidora was a little more demanding this time at the ALDUB Share The Love episode. “Ibigay mo na sa amin. Magulang din namin ang may ari niyan.” (Give it to us. Our parents owned it too.)

ALDUB Share The Love

Lola Nidora wasnt’ fazed. “Basahin nyo. Anong nakasulat dito? SECRET!” (Read. What’s written here [on the cover]? SECRET!) Donya Tinidora doesn’t find it sensible. “Bakit? Pangalan ba ng magulang natin, Victoria?” (Why? Is our mother named Victoria?) Lola Nidora feared losing the diary again. The diary first appeared as tool for blackmailing against Alden during the early months of the hit KalyeSerye before the riding in tandem stole it. Lola Nidora still remembered the trauma.

Lola Nidora insisted on keeping the diary’s contents a secret. “Malalaman nyo ang laman nito pag puede na.” (You will learn of the contents once it’s okay.) Donya Tinidora brought on the guilt trip. “Sa ‘yo na nga binigay ang mansion. Pinabayaan mo. Tapos ayaw mong pakita sa amin yan?” (They gave you the mansion. And you neglected it. Now you won’t show that [diary’s contents] to us?) Lola Nidora didn’t like Donya Tinidora rushing her. “Sandali. Nauuna ka eh.” (Wait. You’re getting ahead of me.)

ALDUB Share The Love

Everyone, including Alden and Divina wanted to know the truth about Anselmo. And why even as a widow, she couldn’t get over Anselmo. Lola Nidora then relented. Ito ang isa sa mga paborito ko. Ikukwento ko sa inyo. Ang kwento ni Anselmo.” (This is one of my favorite stories. I will relay to you. The story of Anselmo.) Before she could even begin, the the truck horn honked off. Ending the ALDUB Share The Love episode on cliffhanger.

How essential is Anselmo in shaping Lola Nidora’s character today? Tune in to Eat Bulaga. Monday to Saturday at noontime. Like Eat Bulaga’s official Facebook page to catch the ALDUB Share The Love episode replay.

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